(2) Assessing your communication in this step, ask yourself the following questions: What are you satisfied with? Under what circumstances do you feel psychological pressure on communication? Who would you like to keep in touch with most? Who do you like to communicate with the least? Do you always keep happy communication with most people? Do you often feel that your meaning is not clear? Do you often misunderstand others and realize that you are wrong afterwards? Do you keep in touch with your friends often? Are you often too lazy to write or call people? Answering the above questions objectively and seriously will help you to know who your communication with is the best and who your communication with needs to be improved.
(3) Assessing your own communication style In this step, I mainly ask myself the following three questions: Under normal circumstances, do you communicate actively or passively? Do you pay attention when communicating with others? Is the information sufficient when expressing intentions? The communicative situations of active communicators and passive communicators are often obviously different. Research shows that active communicators are more likely to establish and maintain extensive interpersonal relationships with others, and are more likely to succeed in interpersonal communication. Maintaining a high degree of attention in communication helps to understand the psychological state of the other party and can better adjust their communication process according to feedback. No one likes talking to people who are always looking around and absent-minded. When expressing your intentions, you must pay attention to making yourself fully understood. If the information such as words and actions in communication is not sufficient, it will be impossible to express clearly; If there is too much information and redundancy, it will also cause discomfort to the information recipients. The most common example is that you accidentally stepped on someone else's foot, so saying "I'm sorry" is enough to express your apologies. If you continue to say, "I really didn't mean to, and someone squeezed me, I somehow lost my footing ..." This kind of verbosity is disgusting. Therefore, complete information without redundancy is the best way to communicate.
(4) Formulate and implement the communication plan. Through the first few steps, you will certainly find out where you have shortcomings, so as to determine where to focus on improvement. For example, if the scope of communication is narrow, it is necessary to expand the scope of communication; Ignore contact with friends and need to write and call; If communication initiative is not enough, you need to take the initiative to communicate with others and so on. Make these into a step-by-step communication plan, and then put your own plan into action, which is reflected in the specific little things in life. For example, if you feel that your communication range is narrow and your initiative is not enough, you can stipulate to greet two strangers every week, such as asking for directions and chatting. Don't be shy, no one will make fun of your initiative, on the contrary, the other party may appreciate your courage! When making and implementing the plan, we should pay attention to the principle of gradual progress, that is, we should not set too high demands on ourselves, lest we fail to achieve our goals and dampen our enthusiasm. After the small requirements are realized and consolidated, they will put forward higher requirements for themselves.