Me: Got it, there is something wrong with my communication method. My child was mildly depressed before, but now he is much better and his mental strength is much stronger. I asked the child if he needed my help? He said: I don’t know, I don’t know. Even if I ask Dr. Chen, he won’t go. The child's father also made it clear: Don't correct the font, it can't be corrected.
Teacher Zhang: Well, there must be a reason for this situation. From your description, you only see things in your eyes, not the child as a person, so you only care about the child's physical appearance. There is no contact, psychological understanding and support, so you have to start from this aspect in the future and work hard. He has some problems. What is the reason? You have to look for it at the root. What happened to him? Sometimes we listen more to the child's voice and ask more about what happened instead of asking why, why not, why not? The child said: Then I don’t want to write it well. Have you blocked every sentence?
(These words are so familiar, Teacher Zhang got the true message from Dean Wang)
Teacher Zhang: We are not looking for Dr. Chen, but we are asking: Is the child willing? When the child is willing, we will look for it. If the child is not willing, then we should improve the child's ability to ask for help in life, instead of you directly telling him: Then let's go to such and such an expert? Even children are disgusted by such parents. How is it possible that he will go to whomever the parents tell him to go to?
Me: What’s the reply from the teacher?
Teacher Zhang: You can seek truth from facts, you say: Teacher, to be honest, I have had a headache and been anxious about this matter this year [crying]. I have also tried to communicate with my children, but it has not been effective. Not big. When I received your text message, my first reaction was that I was very moved. I think you have never given up on your child. Teacher, take a look. Do you have any other suggestions? Because in the past, my method was to talk to him and noisy him, but it didn’t work [crying]. Do you have any suggestions? Then I will implement it at home and see how we can jointly promote the progress of our children?
When the head teacher tells you about your child, it means that the head teacher values ??our child. He doesn’t care about anything and gives up. Are you anxious again? Then if our child does have a problem, think about it and the teacher ignores you every day, are you crazy again? So we ourselves don’t have the ability to communicate with teachers. When the teacher talks about us, we don’t know what to do and we panic, so every time the teacher talks about the child’s problems, we reply when we should, seek truth from facts, face the problem head-on, and then unite with the teacher. Teachers know children best. When it comes to learning, no teacher understands children. We may only know about the child’s life, family, and what he is like in school. That’s all the teacher knows best! We shouldn’t panic no matter what questions the teacher sends us, we just want to unite the teachers and make them a team so that together we can achieve success for our children. This is our goal.
(At this point, I was completely convinced, so I opened my heart completely, communicated with Teacher Zhang, and talked about the child’s previous psychological emotions, etc.)
Finally, Teacher Zhang suggested that I talk to the hospital in the morning Stay connected for a long time. If there are such harsh words and emotional excitement, the child will not be willing to consult. Generally, parents have to consult one-on-one.
After communicating with Teacher Zhang, I communicated with my lover on WeChat about this writing matter, because my lover came back from Beijing to take the star and could not go home.
My husband summed up two principles:
1. The words can be scrawled, but they must be seen clearly by others. This is the bottom line.
2. The structure and layout must be certain Beautiful, from left to right, top to bottom, don't write randomly. Let others see the process clearly.
There are also the following questions:
My son’s questions are not scrawled, but the layout is confusing, making it difficult to find the beginning and end. When answering questions, he likes to start from the middle every time, and the words are relatively small. Big, as he writes, he finds that there is no space, so he just randomly finds a place to write, and the more he writes, the smaller he becomes. There are also problems with children:
He is conceited in details and inferior in the overall situation. This is what causes him currently The reason why he is falling behind further and further.
Solution:
You let him take the paper home every day, and then when you are in the messy area of ??the paper, tell him that he can’t see clearly, and ask him to tell you from beginning to end. Once per night. For example, the child said: The inability to finish the writing is caused by a weak grasp of the knowledge points, the thinking time invested in the question is too long, or the overall grasp of the paper is not good (easy first, then difficult, don’t stay on the difficult questions). The reasons for difficult problems in mathematics, physics and chemistry , because he did not attend extracurricular classes, did not preview himself, and did not practice the question types in private. On the one hand, he was not familiar with the knowledge points, and on the other hand, his knowledge level was low (meaning that the question types exceeded his teaching schedule, and he needed to learn something in advance )
A bit arrogant, but lacking in hard work and diligence.
I sent these to Teacher Zhang to see. Can I praise my husband so much that he is a teacher? It’s the truth. I didn’t pay much attention to my husband’s opinions and suggestions before. When Teacher Zhang said this, I felt so stupid. Teacher Zhang also suggested that when you say “our son”, you can’t say “your son”. Accept it all, I am the cause of all problems.
So, today I changed my name to "our son", changed my husband's WeChat name to "my dear", and said to my husband: My son's problem must be solved by my dear husband, I will implement it, and we can work together. They worked together to catch their son and lift him up. From today on, I will chase you again.
my dear replied: big smile.
Thank you to Teacher Zhang and Teacher Alian for your guidance and help. I am on the road to spiritual practice...