"Be cautious in being alone" means being able to consciously abide by various moral principles when living alone without supervision. Shendu is an important concept in Confucianism. Shendu pays attention to the cultivation of personal moral standards and values ??the integrity of personal conduct. It is the highest state of personal style. The word "Be cautious about being alone" comes from "Wenzi Jingcheng Chapter": "A sage is not ashamed of his scenery, and a gentleman is cautious about being alone." It means that a sage is not ashamed of his own figure, and a gentleman is cautious about being alone. The saint is kind and the gentleman cultivates himself. This is the embodiment of the realm of life. It seems simple, but it is actually not easy.
King Luo Bin wrote in "Yinghuo Fu", "A gentleman has the right to enter a dark room and not deceive." So later generations gradually evolved into the saying that "a gentleman is careful to be alone and does not deceive the dark room." If a person can be "cautious and independent", even if he does not reach the realm of a saint, he will definitely be among the gentlemen.
Because it is difficult to be "cautious in independence", it is especially valuable to be able to do it. Maybe everyone has two completely different personalities, one in front of everyone, and another when alone in a secluded room. In front of everyone, they are shining and talking, but when they are alone, they are slovenly and indulgent, and there are so many flies and dogs. Therefore, in the teaching tutorials, on the one hand, we pay attention to the children's performance in the group and in the classroom; on the other hand, we must understand the children's dynamics at home. Listening to his words and watching his actions will reveal a complete personality expression.
However, Shendu’s restraint on people is more of a moral level and a high degree of self-discipline. I once tried that my reading and writing efficiency during self-study in the classroom is very different from my efficiency at home. When a person is alone, his attention is often distracted, and he unconsciously moves his cell phone, looks through things, and is in a daze, and time often passes by. So, how does an individual move from self-discipline to a state of caution and independence step by step?
First, aim high. To have noble aspirations and interests, that is, a person's personality should be unified, not divided, not duplicitous, not duplicitous. Be open and aboveboard in dealing with others, and don't be a gentleman in front of others and a villain behind your back. With such value pursuit and spiritual orientation, we can make the right choice no matter what situation we face.
Secondly, you should cultivate yourself in silence. Indifferent and clear aspirations, tranquility and far-reaching. Without a peaceful mind, there is no bright future. In this chaotic and fast-paced era, in this noisy information space, we can quietly be alone, talk to our souls, have a book, a cup of tea, watch the clouds roll and relax, and watch the flowers bloom and fall. What a beautiful artistic conception it is. ah.
When there is something to do. A self-disciplined person must know what he wants to do. What should we do during this time of solitude and meditation? Whether you are reading, writing, practicing calligraphy, growing flowers or watching fish, you must be aware of it. If you are aimless and follow the reins, and gradually develop the habit of being free and loose, you will inevitably develop bad habits.
Some people say, "If you are satisfied with things, your heart will always be at peace, and when you have no expectations, you will be self-sufficient." This is a mentality of contentment and happiness. And I want to say that people who can be "cautious about being alone" will have a high moral character, because being cautious about being alone is really a state of life in which one has to look up to the top of a mountain.