Are these practices effective?
1. Punishment.
This is a common method used by tiger parents. Beating and cursing, starving, driving out ... how to make children suffer? Is it useful? Maybe, but its negative effects may far outweigh the significance of persistence.
I know a friend who has been learning the piano under the pressure of his parents since childhood and has been insisting. He played well and won some prizes, but he never played the piano again as an adult. He said that when he saw the piano, he would think of the painful experience of being beaten and scolded by his parents.
I wonder how his parents felt when they saw today's result.
2. Preach.
This is the most common way for parents, especially mothers. They will cite examples from all over the world to convince children how important persistence is. "Look at Lang Lang and Jay Chou. They can achieve today because they can persist in playing the piano." "Look at Deng Yaping, who is so short, but because he can persist, he has played invincible all over the world and won one world championship after another." ... are these sermons useful? Unless you say these people have children's idols. Otherwise, the child may not buy it.
3. The next set. Some parents are far-sighted and have long thought about how to treat their children. Do you really want to learn piano? Ok, you write a sentence, "I will insist on not giving up, and I will not give up when I encounter any difficulties." Write it down and sign your name. Again, mom and dad recorded this sentence.
Isn't this a difficult move? When the child wants to fight the church, take this thing out. The child is dumb and eats coptis chinensis, and the pain can't be said. The problem is that when children find that, as you said, you should insist on doing certain things, such as exercising, but they can't do it because of the wind, rain and cold weather, and they can't get up in the morning and evening, they will say, "You can't insist on it yourself, why should I insist?"
What can parents do for their children's persistence?
1. Give children the choice and probation period.
One is to give children the right to choose. If you want children to learn something that is not their own interest, it is difficult to stick to it. Even if you insist, it is difficult to learn well. After all, interest is the best teacher, and children are motivated to stick to what they are interested in.
Second, give the child a probation period. When my child was in the first grade of primary school, I heard a friend's child playing the piano at a friend's house. They thought it was nice and said they wanted to learn. My mother and I were very happy, so we sent her to an interest class. In order to practice at home, we went to the music store and bought her an old piano, which cost more than 7000 yuan. Who knows that after studying for only a few months, I don't want to learn, and it's useless to persuade. Later, this piano became an ornament at home. This incident made me realize that children are easily interested in new things and easily transferred. Don't take it as a long-term or lifelong goal because of a temporary interest, and easily invest a lot of money and energy. It is best to give the child a probation period. After a period of probation, when you find that your child's interest is getting stronger and stronger, and you also have the talent and development potential in this area, it is not too late to invest a lot of energy in careful training.
What should I do when my child's interest is in trouble and he wants to give up? Yuzuru Hanyu, the father of the Japanese ice prince, taught us a good lesson. Because learning to skate is tiring and boring, Yusheng once said to his father, "I hate skating a little." I don't want to go on. I want to learn baseball. " Yu Sheng's father said: "If you really hate it, it is ok to give up. We will make an appointment for a period of time, during which you will try baseball to see if you prefer baseball or skating. If you finally choose baseball, then dad will support you. After a period of trial, Yusheng felt that he was more suitable for skating. Because it is the result of the child's own experience and choice, he works hard and can persist.
2. Create an environment for children.
The first is to find a study partner for your child. My daughter swam in primary school and once told us that she didn't want to learn any more. Later, we found that it was cold at that time, and few people learned to swim, especially people her age. She felt lonely and bored. Fortunately, a big sister came after their swimming class, and they had a good chat. She really wants to go again. Unfortunately, this girl graduated from junior high school and went to high school. Her daughter has no companion and wants to give up. This time we thought of one of her classmates, so we contacted her parents and invited him to join the swimming class. In this way, the child has another partner, so don't mention things that don't want to swim. "One person walks fast, a group of people walk far", loneliness is too difficult to persist, especially for adults and children. So it is very important to find a study partner for children.
The second is to create conditions for children to see. Ding Junhui's father, Ding Wenjun, is self-employed. He took his children everywhere to see billiards directors since he was a child. He also resisted the pressure of family and society, and let the school allow Ding Junhui to study only Chinese and mathematics, study for half a day and practice for half a day. After that, he gave up his original business, opened a golf room and sent Ding Junhui to Shanghai for professional training during the holidays. For the development of his children, he moved his family to Dongguan and let Ding Junhui play in a billiards city. Even sold all the houses in Yixing, my hometown, and let Ding Junhui play ball. After Ding Junhui became famous, he took his son to England to study snooker. In order to cultivate him, he almost lost everything. It is precisely because of the good environment created by the father for his son and the continuous learning and growth at a new starting point that Ding Junhui can persist so well and achieve today's achievements.
The third is to let children constantly experience a sense of accomplishment. The father in the Indian film "Wrestle, Dad" is to let his daughter win one victory after another in the competition with male wrestlers and experience a great sense of accomplishment. Finally, the daughter persisted all the way until she finally succeeded.
3. Be a role model for children.
Parents are the best teachers for children. The best way to make children insist is for parents to set an example. I don't know if you have noticed that there are very few people in the world who can persist in doing one thing 10 or 20 years. Whether it's hobbies or learning a skill, most parents spend three days fishing and two days drying their nets. After three minutes of heat, you will give up unconsciously when you encounter various difficulties.
I am no exception, such as learning calligraphy, learning English, learning musical instruments, and none of them persist. In order to exercise, I have chosen many forms of exercise before, such as running, playing Tai Chi, and practicing the lion's roar for a while, but none of them persisted. Because these sports methods have certain requirements for the weather and environment, if it is windy and rainy, you can't stick to it.
Finally, I found the most suitable exercise method-standing pile. I get up at five o'clock every morning to practice. I persisted for several years and now it has become a habit.
My daughter has rhinitis. In order to let her get up and run in the morning, I started running twice a day in the community some time ago. No matter whether it's windy or rainy, no matter whether my daughter comes down or not, I insist (running in the garage when it rains). I found that as long as I persist well, I don't have to say that the child can persist.
Persistence is the most important and difficult thing in the world. Whether a child can become a persevering person depends on how parents treat their children and themselves.