Anyone who has studied calligraphy knows that only the front end of Tibetan can write excellent works with amazing brushstrokes. The same is true of being a man. You don't have to be too sharp-edged, which may be in line with China people's implicit and modest thoughts.
Sometimes Zeng Guofan is too sharp-edged, so he is envied everywhere and assassinated everywhere. Even Emperor Xianfeng doesn't trust him. 1February 857, his father Zeng Linshu died of illness, and the court gave him three months' leave to go back to Jiangxi to lead the troops to fight after the leave expired. Zeng Guofan's request to seize power was rejected, and then he went to ask Emperor Xianfeng to intercede, saying that he was scared day and night after returning to his hometown. He thinks that he is not a talented person and is in a position where he can't display his talents. If he wants to be filial, he can't repay the kindness of the emperor. If he wants to be loyal, he cannot thank his parents.
Emperor Xianfeng was well aware of Zeng Guofan's tentative tone, but he still insisted on not giving power. At this time, Jiangxi's military affairs have improved, so he pushed the boat with the tide and approved: "Jiangxi's military affairs have gradually improved, that is, Chun' an has become clean. You should keep the ceremony for the time being and wait for orders." If the fake play is really done, Zeng Guofan is really in distress situation.
In addition, Zeng Guofan has to bear the pressure of public opinion from all sides. This time Zeng Guofan left the army to attend the funeral, which was disloyal. Later, he used his comeback as a weight and demanded real power, which was quite different from the image of Neo-Confucianism advertised on weekdays. Therefore, it attracted all kinds of accusations and criticisms and once again became the center of public opinion. Wu wrote to Zeng Guofan that "he was buried in his mother's house and was ordered by the DPRK to stop the blockade of Hunan, so he made a brave move."
Ceng Gong's deeds are so violent that everyone knows that they do whatever they want, not those who benefit from it. Today, the thief is unfair, the army is not short of interest, and it is still hoped that it will be finally made. Zeng Chenggong can't live without a heart. He has a heart, not a slander, and everyone knows it. ..... In the memorial, he was often accused of not filling in the official title, and his mind was clear, which was unusual. "Wu's outspokenness embarrassed Zeng Guofan.
In the case of internal troubles and foreign invasion, Zeng Guofan lost sleep. After a period of introspection since the Enlightenment, Zeng Guofan has made great changes in his cultivation, and he is no longer sharp-edged in dealing with people, but has become increasingly harmonious.
Wisdom is useful, not small. The most difficult weakness for people who are eager for success is to show that they don't pay attention to time and occasion, are conceited and don't know how to bend and stretch.
Zeng Guofan's way of life, knowing how to bend and stretch, is also learned from lessons and experiences.
Later, Zeng Guofan believed that people should not be self-righteous, should not be self-centered, should be competitive everywhere, and should not give others the opportunity to show off and show off, otherwise others will soon resent him, and the possibility of future cooperation can be imagined.
As the old saying goes, "Lucky people talk less, impetuous people talk more." The meaning of this sentence is that people with good ideological cultivation have concise language and do not comment indiscriminately; And impetuous people, gushing, have nothing to say.
Zeng Guofan used his own experience to test the shortcomings of being too strong. He said that when a person is alone, he doesn't talk much; When I get along with my relatives, I seldom talk. But when you are with friends, you talk a lot. If you happen to be with friends of the opposite sex, you will talk more. When you want to express yourself, you will be inspired, and when you talk about your pride, you will dance. A boaster originally wanted to show his advantages, but at the same time, he also exposed his shortcomings. He only knows how to immerse himself in his own fun, regardless of other people's feelings. Therefore, Zeng Guofan not only often checks whether his words and deeds are too vivid, but also reminds his current friends to pay attention.
It can be seen that when dealing with people, indirectness is often better than directness, and less words are often better than more words. Soft but not rigid is the motto of communication.