Hemingway: "You China people are really hardworking people."
Secretary: "What?"
Hemingway: "Whenever I pass the street in the morning, I can often see a sign on the roadside saying' Morning' to remind people who pass by to work not to be late."
out-of-control
Hemingway took part in the "Mandarin Speech Contest", and his opening remarks were as follows: "Ladies and gentlemen, I have to apologize to you first. I can't speak Mandarin well. I have the same relationship with your language as I do with my wife. I love it very much, but I can't control it. "
Braised donkey
When Hemingway first set foot in a restaurant in China, he called steamed stuffed bun "newspaper". The waitress really patiently explained, "Newspapers are sold across the street, and daily newspapers and evening papers are readily available."
I want to eat jiaozi, but it's a pity that the "sedan chair" comes out of my mouth, and the waitress falls into the clouds.
To the waitress's bewilderment and even anger, he ordered "braised pork" and claimed that it was his favorite dish in China. Seeing the waitress look unhappy or even angry, Hemingway quickly showed her the menu. The waitress realized that he wanted to eat "braised ribs".
Very good, even better.
Shortly after Hemingway came to China, he could only speak two Chinese words: "very good" and "better".
One day, a clerk said, "I want to take two weeks off."
Hemingway said, "Very good."
The servant said, "Because my father is dead."
Hemingway said, "Better."
It's nothing.
Hemingway held a staff meeting: "People in China call things' things', such as desks and chairs, televisions and so on. But living animals are not called things, such as insects, birds, beasts, people, etc. , so you and they are not things, and I am naturally not things! "
simple meal
At a banquet held for Hemingway, the Chinese representative politely told him that when a light meal was prepared for him tonight, the foreign man looked at the table full of delicacies and said in surprise, "If this is a light meal, it is really a shit meal."
I lost my appetite all night.
Chinese is great.
Hemingway said to the translator, "Your China is wonderful, especially in writing. For example:
"China defeated the United States" means that China won;
China defeated the United States, which means that China won.
In a word, victory will always belong to you. "
Beautiful everywhere.
Hemingway didn't know the China people's "where! Where! " This is a self-deprecating word. Once when he attended a wedding, he politely praised the bride as beautiful, and the groom on the side said on behalf of the bride, "Where! Where! " Unexpectedly, this foreign man was shocked! So he used China's straightforward words: "Hair, eyebrows, eyes, ears, nose and mouth are beautiful!" As a result, the audience burst into laughter
Mathematical Chinese
Hemingway came to China and named himself Zhang, a China. For a foreigner, it is really not easy to write a complicated word "Zhang"-and it is cursive.
Surprised, I couldn't help asking him. He said, "Nothing. I just wrote the number three and thirteen quarters in one stroke. "
Dizzy!
The new meaning of the word "kiss"
Hemingway studied Chinese. While studying the word "kiss", Hemingway asked a question: "Kiss means" don't "and" mouth ". How to kiss without moving your mouth? "
Someone thought for a moment and smiled and replied, "China people are more reserved, and' not talking' means' not talking'.
Can you talk when you kiss? "
Wei what
Hemingway's wife came to China and took a China name Wei. One day, the couple met a friend for a walk. After a while, they exchanged greetings.
Friend: "What's your wife's name?"
Hemingway: "The surname is Wei."
Friend: "Wei what?"
Hemingway: "Why? Why is the surname Wei? "
All kinds of "juice"
Once, I tested Hemingway's idiom ability: "Rack one's brains".
The result is:
Rack one's brains, milk, juice and soup.
Ha! "You really racked your brains and didn't come up with' racking your brains'."
difficult position
Although there are many jokes that make me laugh, it is gratifying to see foreigners trying to learn the culture and language of China. So I encouraged, "Your Chinese level has improved rapidly." He loudly responded to my China courtesy: "jam, jam (flatter me, flatter me)".
In a scenic spot in the north, a southerner shouted "My child, my child fell into the lake ~ ~". A passer-by immediately jumped into the lake and got only one shoe.
When Marley went to see a doctor, the doctor called him Manet.
The chemist called him Ma Yin.
Call him Ma Bing when taking medicine.
What is even more ridiculous is that during the injection, the nurse exclaimed, "Why is this patient called horse meat?"
Ancient poetry reflecting the homophonic characteristics of Chinese characters
Two apes cut down trees in the deep mountain, and the little monkey dared to look (sentence)
How does the old beast solve the problem (hoof)-solve the problem?
Lotus root and lotus root, (why do I get a couple)
Apricots don't need plums (fortunately, they don't need media)
A dog gnaws at a river (monk) bone-Su Shi
Poems on Dongpo of Flowing Water (corpse)-Fo Yin
Su Shi-the first spring of Xiangyang family.
Go beyond it (Fish) Celebrate the Good Man-Fo Yin.
He Danshang (monk) on Shiguta
Embroidered in front of the beauty hall (scholar)
Confucius was born on the weekend of the week.
Light dance (martial arts) began in Hanzhong (light dance: lightning; Hanzhong: the sky)
Lantern cage lights, paper (orange) shells used to be just windproof.
Drum drum, tangerine peel can't knock half (summer)
Lotus (pity) son is bitter in heart.
Pear-shaped (separated) intra-abdominal acid in children
A joke about homophonic features of Chinese characters
Geographical name correlation
On New Year's Eve, my brother took two overseas Chinese students home for dinner. One is cheerful and the other is more formal.
During the dinner, the cheerful classmate smiled and said to us, "He is from Myanmar, so he is shy." Then raise your glass to toast everyone, raise your head and drink it off, and then say, "I'm from Yangon."
The headmaster is angry.
At the school affairs meeting at the end of the semester, the headmaster was furious at the inefficiency of personnel management. He said, "the person in charge of the director's business is not sensible; The consciousness of personnel management is not strong; Not an official! "
Rural conference
At a meeting in the village, the village chief said, "Rabbit, shrimp, don't burn melons, pickles are too expensive." Comrades and villagers, don't talk. The meeting is over now. The host said: "Sausage paste melon for pickles." (Now, the head of the township will speak. The township head said, "Rabbit, shrimp, today's meal.
Two-part allegorical saying reflecting homophonic features of Chinese characters
Mother's Sisters-Suspicious (menstruation)
The crib on the stage-No (Bucheng)
The whip on the stage-overweight (fake horse)
Fire in Kannonji-Miao (Temple Disaster)
Monkey Sun sits in the golden hall-unlike Ren (a man).
Birthday Shooting-Same tune (gun)
The birthday girl plays the pipa-a cliche (playing)
Wheat straw fire-blowing economizer
Horse racing in the alley-topic (hoof)
The charm of drought worships hag-the best (essence)
Damn bamboo shoots outside the garden-nephew (student)
Men don't beat their wives-it's a blessing (husband and wife)
A scholar writes poetry-he has two hands (the first one).
Bald man takes off his hat-the first name (Ming)
It's just right for a girl from He's family to give it to Zheng Jiazheng (Zheng Heshi)
Abdominal rowing-expert (navigation)
Measuring Rice with a Turtle Cover —— What Sound (L)
It's sad to pull the beard-modesty (pulling the beard) is excessive (crossing the river)
Ring the bell and pull it into the air-fantasy (ring)
Catch bees and eat honey-Tian (sweet) is shameless (stinging)
200 yuan peanuts-you have to refute (peel)
Peach in both hands-reasonable (gift)
Buy camels at Huguo Temple-There is no such thing (city)
Zanthoxylum bungeanum is caught in the rice crisis (rice)
On the homophonic characteristics of Chinese characters in couplets
1. Lotus (lotus seed) has a bitter heart and pear (liver) has a sour stomach.
2. Living in a pagoda, watching Kong Ming (Zhuge Liang), but resenting Jiang Wei (Jiang Wei), I find it difficult to travel (Lu Bu).
3. The bird is in the cage and the heart is in the nest (Cao Cao). Hate Guan Yu (Guan Yu) instead of Zhang Fei (Zhang Fei)
4. In the two-boat race, rowing speed (Lu Su) is not as fast as sailing (climbing).
5. A hundred schools of thought contend that Di Qing (Di Qing) is more difficult than Xiaohe (Xiao He).
6. You get lotus roots from lotus roots, but if you have apricots, you don't need plums or media.
7. Confucius was born in Zhou (Zhou), and dance (martial arts) began in Hanzhong.
8. The history of the pen is lingering, although it is not famous; Hong En is powerful, don't try to serve the country and become an enemy!
Shi Kefa, Hong Chengchou.
Harmony poem:
Wentingyun
A candle at the bottom of a well keeps Lang Changxing from going. (candle indication, expired)
Linglong dice Anhoudou, what do you know about bone acacia?
Zhi Zhu's Ci Liu Yuxi
The willows in Jiang Shuiping are green, and I can hear the songs on the Langjiang River.
Rain in the east, sunrise in the east, said it was not sunny, but it was still sunny. (Sunshine-Affection)