Xie, whose surname is Liu, was later renamed Xie by his father-in-law. He is an ordinary miner in Xinzhuchun Company of Henan Coking Coal Group.
The neighbors didn't know Lao Xie's original name for a long time, and they always regarded him as Xie Jia's son rather than a son-in-law. After all, even a son can take care of the elderly like him.
Neighbor Yu Naixiu recalled Lao Xie taking care of his father-in-law: in summer, he carried the old man outside in the shade for air, and then carried him home. Go back to the sun in winter, and then go back to the house. "Even my own children don't run back and forth all day."
My father-in-law has been paralyzed in bed for nearly 18 years, taking care of my mother-in-law and silly brother-in-law for more than 30 years. Lao Xie's work is much harder than his neighbors saw.
Thirty-three years ago, Xie Xiang, his wife who had been married for one year, developed postpartum fever 40 days after giving birth to her daughter. Incomplete medical and health conditions at that time could not save his wife's life. As the eldest daughter, his wife entrusted her parents and younger brother to Xie before her death.
The situation of the father-in-law's family is also not optimistic: the mother-in-law is basically unable to work because of emphysema and other diseases, and the only brother-in-law is born stupid and can't take care of himself. Only my father-in-law works in Jiaozuo Coal Mine more than 300 miles away. Plus the baby daughter, the burden of taking care of this family can be imagined.
In order to comfort her mother-in-law who lost her beloved daughter, Xie choked back her grief and promised the old man with tears: "Mom, I will never leave you, take care of you and take care of you three."
My mother-in-law, who is now over 80 years old, said frankly, "At that time, I was always afraid of smart children. That is to say, if one day we leave, our family will not be settled."
In order to reassure Xie Laotou, he changed his surname from Liu to Xie. Changing one's surname is an important event in the countryside, so the family held a family meeting and discussed it until midnight. "Did you change your surname or not?" The family disagreed for bitter's future.
"Let's talk about it later. I can't leave their family under such circumstances. " Lao Xie doesn't talk much, but he is a man with ideas. In the end, everyone still couldn't beat him.
Changing the surname is only the first step, and the more difficult thing is behind.
1979, my father-in-law was hospitalized after a sudden stroke. Xie tries his best to take care of his father-in-law, and there are other patients to accompany him, but Xie can only bear it alone. Sleep on the cold concrete floor of the ward at night.
Now talking about this, her mother-in-law Feng Jihua's eyes are full of tears. "In the twelfth month of winter, Lianger lies alone on the cold floor of the ward every night for three months."
My father-in-law's life is saved, but I will stay with my bed from now on. Although I was in trouble before, my father-in-law helped me support me; Now, this pillar has fallen down! The life of four people in the family needs his care, and the burden of life is all on Lao Xie.
Lao Xie decided to send her 5-year-old daughter to her hometown to be taken care of by her old mother and brother.
The mother in her hometown couldn't bear to watch her son in his twenties live like this, and let Lao Xie's third brother persuade him to go back to his hometown. "Go and call Liang Er back. He can't always be like this. He will have to marry another daughter-in-law in the future. "
Liu Yansheng, the third brother, said, "I found my brother's residence in the city, and I cried when I saw them living in a shabby house not far from the public toilet. Even my life as a farmer at home is better than that. "
Bitter didn't go back with third brother. "Elder brother, you can see, I want to come back here who cares? People always have a little conscience, and it would be too heartless for me to go back. " The words of thanks left Third Brother speechless.
My father-in-law was lying in bed, his limbs stiff. According to the doctor's advice, Xie should exercise his limbs every day. At first, the old man couldn't stand the pain and would scold him. Xie Yan Xin always smiles and says, "Dad, what do you sound like?"
Under the careful care of Lao Xie, after more than four months, my father-in-law was able to walk around the yard with a stool. Xie keeps in mind the doctor's instructions and often turns over and puts talcum powder on the old man. Carry the old man out in the sun for several hours every day.
The doctor who treated his father-in-law said, "Lao Xie (Xie's father-in-law) has been in bed for 18 years and has no bedsore. It's really rare, thanks to his son-in-law. "
Bedridden patients often have dry stools, so Xie Yan Xin put on gloves and dug up the old man bit by bit. I heard that the skin of winter melon and the rhizome of grass can induce diuresis and relieve constipation, so he went to dig in the wild and boiled water for the elderly every day.
My father-in-law's monthly sick leave salary of more than 60 yuan can't support the whole family of four, so Lao Xie took the time to go to the brick kiln in the nearby countryside to do odd jobs to make money to supplement his family. In order to save a few yuan for vegetables, he also planted rape on the garbage dump and ate it cold when it was tender. The elders eat while frying, and then squeeze it into oil to eat.
One of the traditional Chinese medicines my father-in-law eats is scorpion. In order to save money, Xie followed the doctor's advice and took dry food to the mountain more than forty miles away from home. On the first day, he found more than half a catty.
1983, Xie replaced his father-in-law and became a worker in the first mining area of Zhucun Mine.
I got paid in the first month of work. Xie, who was never willing to spend money indiscriminately, bought a radio for his father-in-law to relieve boredom.
Loneliness is the most unbearable thing for people lying in hospital beds for a long time. My father-in-law likes to listen to martial arts novels, so Xie borrows novels from the library and reads them to his father-in-law when he has time. From 18, he read hundreds of novels to his father-in-law.
From 65438 to 0989, my father-in-law got liver cirrhosis, and it was terminal. My mother-in-law knew the difficulties at home and advised Xie not to send her husband to the hospital: "What an old man!" "
Xie, who has always been obedient to her mother-in-law, resolutely disagreed: "It's a life anyway. No matter how poor you are, you can't wait to die at home. Come on, who am I? " Xie borrowed 1000 yuan from his hometown to take his father-in-law to the hospital.
1August, 996, my father-in-law left. Xie said to his father-in-law, "Don't worry, Dad, as long as I have my own food, I won't let my mother and Yan Niu (my brother-in-law) starve."
"As soon as a bitter arrives for dinner, he looks for Yan Niu. How many roads did he run for this, but he never bothered Yan Niu. " Stupid brother-in-law about the same age as Lao Xie often runs around alone, and Lao Xie always calls him back before eating. Neighbors are aware of this, but also helped the bitter a lot, saving a lot of heart for the bitter.
Brother-in-law can't take care of himself, so Lao Xie is patient. My brother-in-law's nails are always neatly cut. Although my brother-in-law is stupid, he will say, "My brother Liang is the best."
My father-in-law left safely, and my 82-year-old mother-in-law was in good health, while Lao Xie's health went from bad to worse. Xie suffers from severe hypertension. In order to save money, he heard that soaking peanuts in vinegar can lower blood pressure. He took 13 years and had to be hospitalized for cerebral hemorrhage in 2003.
The old woman looked lovingly at her white-haired son-in-law and said, "This house is like an egg standing on a pole. Without it, it would have been broken. "
The mother-in-law said that she had a bad temper and sometimes quarreled with her son-in-law, but the son-in-law kept smiling. "She never makes me angry and never says anything awkward. At that time, some people gossip that I can't count on my son-in-law, but I rely on my son-in-law! "
A poor father is also rich.
Lao Xie said that the person he is most sorry for is his daughter Liu Bianying. Speaking of her daughter's almost blind right eye, bitter and always cheerful, she was silent. ...
No matter rich or poor, parents in the world have the same feelings for their children. To take care of her father-in-law, Xie left her five-year-old daughter at home. Not cruel, but he really has no choice.
As far as I remember, she didn't wear new clothes before 16 years old. 16 years old Before the Spring Festival, my father went home to do business. For the first time in her life, she asked her father for money and wanted to go to the village with her sisters. Her father took 5 yuan money out of his pocket.
16 years old is the flower season for girls to love beauty. Some of the sisters who went together bought new clothes for the Spring Festival, and some went to buy all kinds of cosmetics. However, Ying Ying's sweaty 5 yuan money was afraid to buy anything. Finally, she bought a box of rouge with 2 yuan money.
My father was very angry when I got home. This is also the first time she saw her father angry. After dinner, her father called her to him and said, "Jenny, we can't compare with others." The flowers can't be spent. "
Liu Bianying said: "At that time, I didn't fully understand my father's words, but I still blamed him in my heart. Fathers who work outside can always buy some new clothes for their children during the Spring Festival. Why is my father so stingy? "
When Bian Ying 18 years old, there were a group of children playing in the village at night. A stone was hitting Bian Ying's right eye, and no one could find out who was injured in the darkness. Mother Xie Fenxiang (stepmother) took her to the village for inspection overnight. The doctor said that the eye injury was too serious and he had to go to a big hospital for treatment. The next day, I checked in the five senses hospital of Jiaozuo Mining Bureau. The doctor said I needed hospitalization.
Mr. Xie told the doctor that he didn't have enough money on him and would go through the hospitalization formalities tomorrow.
At night, when I got home, the smile that I often hung on my face disappeared. After supper, he shut himself in his room. Ying Ying can be heard outside, and her father is sighing inside. In the memory of becoming an Englishman, no matter how difficult it is, my father always smiles. This time, he is really too difficult.
The next day, my father sent Bian Ying home. When getting on the bus, her father suddenly asked her, "Connie, do you hate me?" Bianying shook his head evenly. It is because of this hospitalization deposit that Bian Ying lost the best treatment opportunity. So far, Bian Ying is almost blind in her right eye.
In Jiaozuo, I ate my father's simple meals, looked at the furniture given to my father in the mine, and felt the dilemma of sharing a room with an old man, a paralyzed man and a stupid man. Bian Ying said, "I know my father doesn't want to treat me. He really can't get a hospital deposit of several thousand yuan! "
From then on, Bian Ying began to understand her father. Now that she has become a mother, she gradually understands her father's difficulties.
"He is so difficult that he has never enjoyed anything." Speaking of his father, Liu Bianying's eyes are red.
Father didn't give Britain much material satisfaction, but more spiritual words and deeds.
1994 The 22nd of the twelfth lunar month is the wedding day in England. Mother Xie Fenxiang prepared the dowry early. On the afternoon of December 21st, my father came back. He called Bian Ying to his side and said to her, "Ni, a good girl doesn't care about dowry. When you get married, I have nothing to give you. I'll send you a sweater book with two poems I copied. "
Bian Ying took the book without cover from his father, only to see it neatly written: "Although Rhizoma Coptidis is bitter, it is sweet under the root of the tongue after drinking;" Saccharin water is sweet, but it becomes bitter when used too much. It fully shows that there is sweetness when there is bitterness, and sweetness and bitterness are linked. If you are willing to suffer often, you can always be sweet. "Another song wrote:" Economy is the foundation of happiness, and waste is the seedling of poverty; " Production is like a cash cow and savings is like a cornucopia; Be thrifty about food and Man Cang, and spend a lot of money at the bottom of the warehouse; Remember hard work and be thrifty. "
Two simple and simple life truths are Lao Xie's experience in hard life. Bian Ying said that these two paragraphs are family heirlooms.
Love with your heart.
After his wife died, relatives introduced Xie to a new person. When the other party hears about the situation at home, they either feel too burdened or don't understand. In this way, Xie spent 10 years alone with his father-in-law, until Xie Fenxiang, a fellow villager, appeared.
"Everyone in the village knows him. He is so kind to his parents-in-law, and certainly not bad to me. I feel comfortable in my heart. " Xie Fenxiang explained why she married Lao Xie. Married to a reliable and conscientious person, Xie Fenxiang is down-to-earth in his heart.
After marriage, Xie Fenxiang took care of children, served the elderly and farmed in her hometown in Hua County, and Lao Xie took care of her father-in-law in Jiaozuo. Every once in a while, Xie Fenxiang goes to Jiaozuo's home to unpack and wash the bedding for the whole family.
Looking back, from marriage to taking care of her sick husband in Jiaozuo in 2003, Fenxiang said that she had been with her husband for less than a year. Lao Xie always tells her: "I take care of my parents-in-law, you take care of my parents and set an example for my children."
Xie Fenxiang and her ex-husband have a son and a daughter, plus the daughters of Lao Xie and his ex-wife, and a daughter of her and Lao Xie. The composition of this big family is very complicated in the eyes of others, but the family gets along well and the days when they are not rich are also very harmonious.
Lao Xie owes too much to his wife and children, and Xie Fenxiang and the children don't care. Fenxiang and Lao Xie's brothers take care of their parents at home and do their filial piety for Lao Xie. Life in the village is not bad.
"The villagers think bitter will laugh no matter how hard it is, and I can't give him a shame. I want to live a good life. " Xie Fenxiang is as strong as Lao Xie.
"Lao Xie never says anything comforting, but he has this home in his heart." Xie Fenxiang said. Every time he goes back to his hometown, Lao Xie does everything he can to help his wife as soon as he enters the door.
The new house has just been built, with no doors and windows and no dry walls. Xie Fenxiang moved in with her children. Xie listened to the neighbor who went to town and asked him to take a message to his wife: "Don't put your bed by the wall, lest adults and children get wet and get sick."
Simple language, simple love, family support each other and understand with heart.
● There is joy in suffering.
Life is bitter, but the heart is not bitter. After more than 30 years of hardships, there is joy in suffering.
Lao Xie is a clever man. Whenever he has time, he helps his neighbors weave baskets with plastic strips. Neighbors all praised him for making better baskets than those in the market.
Lao Xie likes Henan Opera. When his father-in-law was alive, he listened to the radio with his father-in-law in his spare time. In the evening, the voice of my father-in-law humming Henan Opera to the radio often comes from Xie Jia.
Lao Xie loves calligraphy. A notebook, he writes with a blue pen first and then a red pen, and a notebook is used for two.
Poverty has been with Yan Xin for more than 30 years. 1983 after work, life has improved, but the retirement salary of Yan Xin and his father-in-law adds up to only 100 yuan, which is the living expenses of two old people taking medicine and injections and the family. Every month, he saves 10 yuan vegetable money, keeps digging wild vegetables and picking up sweet potato leaves, sweet potato stalks and cabbage sticks. Self-preserved 10 kinds of four-season side dishes have become his three meals a day.
In order to save some money from his mouth to treat two old people, Yan Xin forgot the taste of bananas, apples and even watermelons for more than ten years from his father-in-law's illness to his death. As for the clothes of Yan Xin and his family, he has never bought them in a store. 4 yuan spent six years wearing a pair of plastic sandals and 10 wearing a shirt. When it gets dirty during the day, he washes it at night and wears it the next day. In order to save a few dollars, every time he sees his father-in-law, he takes his father-in-law to a hospital more than ten kilometers away with a cart.
In order to save money, Lao Xie opened up a vegetable field in the pump room he saw, and several kinds of vegetables were planted in the small vegetable field. His wife looked at his densely planted rapeseed and said that he planted it too densely. Lao Xie smiled and said, "This is what you don't understand. You can eat it when you are young. " Older ones can be mixed and eaten; When rape blossoms, it can be fried and eaten; Finally, the seeds can be squeezed to eat. This is a small green bank! "
As for Xie's family situation, the workers learned from the side that Lao Xie never mentioned family matters in class, and he gave the impression that he was very happy every day. Yan Xin has been working for more than 20 years. No matter what position he is in, he does, loves and is good at it. His work has never been dragged down by his family. 1autumn of 992, my father-in-law was hospitalized for one month. Yan Xin goes to work during the day and goes to the hospital to serve his father-in-law at night, which does not affect his day's work.
During a home visit, Zhao, the leader of the unit's labor union, was surprised to see the situation of Lao Xie's family: a house of more than 10 square meters, two beds made of wooden boards ... Zhao made up a jingle to describe the situation of Xie's family at that time: "There are old and young people in the world, sick and disabled under them, a fool looks up to heaven, and his heart will be soft."
After coming back, the leader talked to Lao Xie and offered him relief money, but he refused. He said, "I live my own life. If I am good, I will not compare with others. Many people are in trouble, not just my family. "