The first time I heard about "Dangerous 13" was at the 4th National Education Walk. There is a sharp contrast between the image of Teacher Wang Binbin and the content she talks about. I was very impressed. "The girl with lipstick who longed for love", "the girl who was slapped three hundred times", "the girl who was addicted to sex" and "the boy who committed rape" are all shocking stories told by the beautiful, generous and intellectual teacher Wang Binbin. A sharp contrast. The protagonists of the story are not very old. They were almost 13 years old when the accident occurred. It is like a cursed age, which makes people feel distressed.
I heard "Dangerous 13" again when I attended Zhang Wenzhi's writing training class during the National Day in 2020. During that training class activity, Binbin and I happened to be assigned together and became roommates, living in the same room. The training activities are very intensive, and writing tasks have to be completed every day. It can be said to be high-intensity learning. But we hit it off so well that we seemed to have endless topics to talk about. In addition to studying, we spent both nights talking long into the early hours. Talk about studying and what you have been doing. During the chat, I learned the story behind "Dangerous 13". In order to interview these children, Binbin sometimes risked his life. When I listened, I felt a little worried about her, but more of a admiration for her. Binbin said that "Dangerous 13" has been written into a book. She promised that after the book is officially published, she will give me a signed copy.
In March 2021, "Dangerous 13" was officially published, and Binbin also couriered a signed book to me as promised.
The book uses 9 typical cases to explain the psychological characteristics of adolescent children for parents and teachers. In addition to stories and interview records, each case also includes three sections: Binbin’s observation and analysis, advice to parents, and psychological construction suggestions. It not only analyzes the whole story, but also summarizes the common characteristics, so that readers can Be inspired by these cases, draw inferences from one example, and then adjust your own education methods.
This book focuses on the sensitive and diverse psychological process of children in the special 13-year-old period, reminding everyone where to focus and what to do to help them successfully overcome the crisis. Looking at the sad, angry and heart-wrenching stories one after another, listening to the facts or the secrets hidden in the hearts of the children during interviews, I felt mixed emotions. Maybe the behavior of the child in the case is a bit extreme, but the psychological process hidden behind the extreme behavior is also typical of most children. After hearing such cases and reading Teacher Binbin’s analysis, I believe that ordinary parents and teachers can be inspired to better accompany their children or students.
At any time, prevention always takes less time and energy than treatment. For children under the age of 13, parents and teachers are the people who have the most contact with them and have the greatest influence on them. Therefore, in addition to the children themselves, the educational concepts, education methods and life conditions of these two types of people are closely related to the healthy growth of the children.
How to deal with children from single-parent families? After Binbin's observation and analysis, in addition to advice to parents, she also made three suggestions to teachers, one of which is:
"We must actively help children develop their strengths, create a suitable environment, and use words of affirmation and support. The attitude helps children overcome low self-esteem and actively encourages students from single-parent families to participate in various activities organized by the class society. Regularly organize some activities and competitions in the class that can help develop their individual talents, such as singing, reading, composition, calligraphy, painting and other competitions. By carrying out such activities, we provide these children with a stage to show themselves and regain their self-esteem. For children with organizational skills, teachers can let them take on the most important tasks in the activities, so as to cultivate and enhance their sense of responsibility and self-confidence. "(P77)
Binbin is one of the practitioners of life-oriented education. Her concern for children is more about their life status and their life growth. Perspective cut. I specially excerpt this suggestion, mainly because it reminds me of the "five management" and "double reduction" activities that we are now vigorously promoting and implementing.
The five-point management focuses on students’ sleep and physical fitness, students’ homework and reading, and mobile phone issues that cause headaches for parents and teachers. The focus of double reduction is on the management of homework and the standardization of extracurricular tutoring. The two activities focus on and guide the whole society from the source at the national level to help children become physically and mentally healthy people.
The two activities this time are not just a matter of chance. The managers have made great determination. Now many online subject tutoring institutions have issued announcements and have stopped teaching activities and are gradually refunding tuition fees. The school has also conducted homework management, and strives to improve the accuracy and quality of homework while reducing the amount of homework. The use of after-school tutoring solves the problem of parents tutoring homework and children studying until late at night, which affects sleep and parent-child relationship. In after-school tutoring, many schools also offer a large number of interest groups and group activities. In addition to daily singing, calligraphy, painting, etc., sports activities such as basketball and track and field, various musical instrument classes such as ocarina and African drum, and various technology groups such as aircraft models and architectural models also enrich the children's extracurricular life and expand their Possible paths to success.
The two activities have been implemented for some time and can be said to have achieved initial results. Many parents are no longer anxious and the smiles on their children’s faces have increased.
I just read a tweet - "After the "double reduction", it is said that the C position of the square dance will be replaced..." The children shown in it are due to the reduction of homework and mobile games. control and have more spare time. A large number of children appeared in the outdoor square to compete with their aunts on the stage. Children in some communities formed a cycling team to exercise together. Some children, in groups of two or three or five, play simple finger games and chasing games together... The activities are different, but the smiles on the children's faces and the energy radiating from their bodies are impressive across the screen. People look at it and feel happy.
These two policies directly reduce parents’ anxiety and free up children’s time from the national level and the social level. However, due to the implementation of these two activities, the workload of ordinary teachers has also increased a lot. A teacher who has no leisure time, a teacher who tightens the strings all day long, a teacher who is full of pressure, and an anxious teacher will have a greatly reduced sense of happiness. It is difficult for a teacher without a sense of happiness to bring true happiness to children.
The good news is that with the implementation of after-school services, in some places, teachers have implemented flexible commuting. Time freedom can give teachers a greater sense of freedom, consciously improve work efficiency, and arrange things around them. However, teachers’ happiness must be improved from the source. In addition to increasing wages and benefits, it is also important to reduce or adjust some tasks.
Some departments and activities like to be crammed into schools and assigned to teachers. Can the relevant departments be responsible for handling these tasks that have nothing to do with teaching? There were also meetings of little significance. Is it possible to prevent teachers from having to travel hard, or put down their teaching work and go to the gathering? It only takes a few minutes for the teacher to take a look at some meeting points, some work priorities, and send a group message. If something can be solved in a few minutes, don’t ask the teacher to spend one or two classes or a whole morning or a day to get involved.
Can you differentiate between the teacher’s instructional design? There is nothing wrong with new teachers who have just come in and carefully design and write detailed plans. Many veteran teachers are already familiar with the key points of the textbooks. Can they not use special lesson plans and just simply mark them in the book? Pay attention to their level and only ask them to submit two or three instructional design reviews each semester.
How many of the teaching summaries submitted by teachers every semester have been carefully read by leaders? Maybe sometimes I don’t even turn over it. Can it be changed to a summary written by the leader for subordinates to read, and a teaching summary written by the teacher for parents and students to read? When a person feels that what he does can be seen, it will be more meaningful and valuable. When the person doing that thing is more likely to have a sense of pleasure and accomplishment.
In a row of books, you can quickly find "Dangerous 13" at a glance because the book belt is yellow. This is a color to which humans are particularly sensitive, a color of alertness, and a color that fits the theme of this book.
This book is on the recommended list of good books to read in the summer of 2021 by Fujian Xinhua Bookstore. It is worth reading by every parent, every teacher, and every adolescent child.
To eliminate the "13-year-old danger" from the source, the five regulations and double deductions are effective. It would be better if we could pay more attention to teachers and reduce their burden.