First, let's look at the first point. Because of an appointment with Jia Baoyu's former alliance of wood and stone, Lin Daiyu came down to repay Shen Ying's kindness in serving the marquis. From the beginning, Lin Daiyu came to return tears. This directly labeled Baodai's love as a tragedy. At the same time, Lin Daiyu in A Dream of Red Mansions symbolizes a free pursuit of love and a hidden meaning of breaking through the shackles of feudal ethics.
Second, Lin Daiyu's personality is particularly sensitive. Relying on others, although he is very talented, he lives very carefully. Because of the requirements for love and Baoyu, it will be particularly bitter when you can't get it. To some extent, it is also a manifestation of insecurity and lack of love. At the same time, because he is a talented woman, he has his pride. Therefore, unlike Xue Baochai's attitude towards people, he is more alienated. This will make the following people feel that he is unreasonable and difficult to get along with. On the one hand, because of Jia Baoyu's identity, Baoyu's wife needs to be able to guard the house to some extent, so it seems that Baochai will be more suitable than Daiyu.
Third, under the bondage of feudal system and feudal thought at that time, no matter family background or temperament. From the perspective of interest, everyone in Jiafu will basically choose a good marriage, and Xue Baochai has a very loving mother to plan for her. But Lin Daiyu is alone. Even if grandma loves him, it is impossible to override the interests of Jia Baoyu and Jia Fu.