When I opened the book "Persistence, a Habit that can be formed", I suddenly realized. I don't want the so-called chicken soup to tell me to stick to it. What I want is for you to tell me an operable methodology. I can accept other people's stories you instill, but you have to guide me how to do it.
Only when I saw this did I understand why I saw so much chicken soup. I understand all the reasons. Why is it still not good That's because no chicken soup will ever tell me how to proceed from reality and improve myself in a down-to-earth way to reach new heights.
What is this book about? First of all, the author also uses a shocking story contrast to illustrate how much "compound interest" benefits will be brought by insisting on this small move, that is, the effect of insisting on doing one thing is also great. We have seen too many such examples. The author puts forward a small point, that is, persistence itself can become a part of our daily habits, just as the author said, "Almost all your practical actions, or at least 95%, are made up of. In other words, when the body learns an action, it can react easily without thinking or effort. This is a habit. If we make what we need to do a part of our behavior habit, then our brain will naturally follow the set habit program to promote a behavior.
The author also explained that although everything has two sides, in our brains, there is no difference between good habits and bad habits, which is the difference in preferences we give to habits according to our own needs. No matter what habit it is, as long as the brain learns this programming in the process of repetition, the body will remember this action, but we can guide the generation or development of habits according to our own consciousness.
For human beings, it will be more comfortable to stay in a fixed state, and change will be regarded as a threat. This is especially obvious for children, especially in the sensitive period of order. They demand a fixed position, or a fixed procedure, or a fixed appearance for everything, such as a bowl without horns, everyone must sit in his own position, and the door needs to be opened according to the procedure set in his mind, and so on. All these reflect that children's persistence in habits is relatively strong, which also reminds us that on the road of parenting, it is really necessary to formulate a safe, sustained, stable and consistent life law for children. All kinds of parenting books have mentioned this point. It is necessary to establish the rules of children's life as soon as possible, which is a necessary condition for children to feel safe.
Then why do we often give up halfway when trying a new thing, and there is only a "three-minute fever"? This is because our body will feel threatened when accepting new things, and the natural body will naturally make reflective resistance and try to restore the established procedures. The author calls it "habitual gravity".
Does this mean that we can only keep the existing brain programs unchanged? Of course not, we can form a new habit through methods and input a new program instruction to the brain consciousness.
So how to form new habits? The author pointed out a clear methodology to us, which is the dry part of this book.
In the process of habit formation? We will go through the following three stages:
1. Resistance period: I want to give up immediately.
2. Unstable period: affected by scheduled events or other factors.
3. Burnout period: getting bored gradually
The first is the first stage: the Anti-Japanese War.
42% people will fall down early at this time. At this time, the obstacle effect of "habitual gravity" is so great that we need to bite our teeth. The key point of this stage is three words-hold on, as long as you hold on, you will win. You don't need to care about whether the quality of the completion is not good enough or not, as long as you keep doing this action, you have succeeded.
So what should we do? One is to start with "toddler", and the other is "simple record". You don't need to set a lofty goal. From a baby's small step, as long as he learns to stand independently, he has succeeded. In addition, new things should be easy to use, easy to understand and the rules must be very clear. At this stage, relax and it doesn't matter if you can't complete the set goals. The key is to keep doing it every time. That's all that matters.
As for the record, just keep it simple and stick to it every day. Recording tools can be electronic files, comparison books or various ways. Now let's reflect. I insisted on keeping accounts at the beginning and gave up in a few days. Maybe I think the more detailed the record, the better. On the contrary, it invisibly gave me the illusion that it was difficult to keep accounts, which made it impossible to do it after a few days.
Then there is the second stage. Unstable period.
Next, 40% people will give up at this stage. At this time, the determination of "accustomed to gravity" to maintain the status quo will be exerted from time to time, and with the improvement of the threshold for reaching the standard in the second stage, the actual motivation for completing one thing will be somewhat insufficient. At this stage, we are most vulnerable to overtime or emergencies, or some extra temptations. Then "establishing a sustainable mechanism" is the most important thing for us to get through this stage.
So, how to establish an effective sustainable mechanism?
First, model, turn the habit you want to cultivate into a ceremony completed at a fixed time, put everything in a reasonable and fixed position, and establish a synchronized action schedule. Refine to when to start doing it every day, how long to finish it, how much to do, and where to do it. The premise is that this place or time requires as few interruption mechanisms as possible, and there will be no random accidents.
Second, set up exception rules. If there really is an unexpected situation that conflicts with the plan, allow yourself to make appropriate adjustments and set up "exceptions" to keep the plan orderly and not make yourself feel guilty.
Third, set a continuous switch. The author provided the 12 customs clearance password to help us continue. We can constantly combine these passwords in the process and match a set of customs clearance passwords that are most suitable for us.
The third stage: burnout period
Coming here is a staged victory, but unfortunately 18% of people still lost in this link. The author tells us that our original program is fighting to the death, and the old and new habits are entering the final tug-of-war. The reason for our failure in this part is not the quantitative burden given to us by new habits, but that we have entered a period of psychological burnout. Can you give yourself some new tricks to make yourself active?
12 continuous switch can be used at any stage, as long as it suits you. With regard to how to use these 12 customs clearance codes freely, the author used a whole chapter to introduce the specific use methods and methods of various continuous switches, some of which are really familiar, as if they had been used before. These 12 passwords are tips to help us clear customs. With these tricks, we won't be lonely on the way to fight monsters. Loneliness can produce a sense of emptiness, and it is necessary to have something new to stimulate occasionally.
The author tells you that you are not fighting alone, and failure is nothing to be afraid of. You can do it by mastering the right method. Everything in the world can be traced back, including sticking to the habit itself.
Send a failed case, insist on punching in, and fall into the second stage, haha, I intend to use this method to start to regain this habit.