I remember one year during the Spring Festival, when I returned to my hometown, my aunt showed me the room where my father used to live in the old house. I looked through the dusty paper on my desk, and there were letters my father wrote with others when he was young. My father's handwriting was very special, and I could see at a glance that there were graffiti paintings, and finally I knew why I only drew birds since I was a child, because that graffiti paper was full of birds. Finally, I turned to a notebook, wrote down some formulas and poems, and turned to the cover, which read: Go all the way in the world and see all the scenery in the world.
So I finally understand why my father took me wandering around for many years, so that I went to three cities in a primary school. When I looked at these, I felt very subtle, because my father was not my father at that time, and I was still swimming in the dark; You're just looking at a peer of a different age, but that person turned out to be your father in the future.
Dad and I both have a characteristic of talking a lot. Basically, he is a humorous man, which has been inherited a little. Therefore, where our father and son are, people generally don't want to interrupt, because they want to listen to us chatting all over the world.
When I was a child, I was full of chivalrous feelings, and I especially wanted to join the Beggars' Sect. Every day, I felt uncomfortable without holding a heel stick or a bamboo pole in my hand, and I didn't have the courage to start a day. Later, my mother couldn't stand it, saying that blind people are like you, holding a stick every day. Hearing this, Dad found some boards from the utility room and got me a wood blade. At that time, I was very happy and thought Dad was awesome.
It is said that when I was a child, I was gifted in all aspects. In primary school, teachers of all subjects asked me to join his interest group. Later, I didn't attend because I begged my father to send me to learn martial arts. When I remembered this one day many years later, I asked my father how I learned to learn martial arts when I first learned it.
Dad said he went to two classes, and when he got home, you found that you didn't fly like Qiao Feng, so he refused to go.
Nevertheless, my father had great expectations for me because of what I won as a child. That he made up his mind to discipline me strictly. Even so strict that our class teacher talked to him personally and told him the story of "pulling out seedlings to help others".
But as time goes by and I grow up, my father's majesty as a father gradually loses its effect in my stubborn heart. I belong to the type of eating soft and not eating hard and erupting in silence. I silently do everything that is completely contrary to my father's expectations.
and because I suddenly left the familiar city and went to another strange place again and again, no one ever asked me if I would accept it or not, and my heart gradually became difficult for people to approach. So a boy from man show and a man from man show are getting farther and farther away.
There is a barrier between father and son, so there is only quarrel, indifference and mutual disregard. Even for one year, there were no more than five sentences between father and son.
At last, when I graduated from junior high school, my parents decided to let me leave home and go to Haikou to go to school by myself. I left with disgust for my father and endured the loneliness of being unaccompanied. Facing the sea, I felt even more lonely.
On the Mid-Autumn Festival in my first year of high school, I sat in the dormitory and watched my classmates pack their things one by one and go home for the holidays with their parents. I sat on the lawn alone that night and couldn't help but miss my parents. Obviously far away, you can often pull back the distance from your heart.
I remember some words my father once said to me, the days I spent fighting with my father, and the fact that my father took pains to talk to me about being a man just because I stood and peed. At that time, my father always told me that one day you would understand.
gradually, disgust and contempt turned into miss, regret and understanding of dad. Later, I wrote a letter to my father, and my father wrote me back soon. After reading the letter, I felt that my heart had been broken for many years. I knew that there were some words that we couldn't say to each other. Then one day, a strange woman called me and told me that she was my aunt. I vaguely remember that my father had such a sister, and my father asked her to come and see me. My aunt is very kind to me, and she is almost meticulous, which makes me feel friendless no longer. My aunt told me that she always knew I was here, and dad couldn't really leave you alone outside.
I was silent at that time. Maybe this is man show's father's love.
Dad doesn't look old, so that I always feel that Dad is not old. Only that day, when I saw my father chatting and laughing with the employees in the factory, the wrinkles around his eyes folded up layer by layer, as if they had risen overnight. At that time, I looked at my father carefully and found that the man who was laughing and smiling was always ten years younger than his actual age, and his eyes lost the look that had always been in my impression.
I recall that three years ago, my father told me in front of me that he planned to leave Chongqing and return to Guangdong. At that time, although I hadn't returned to Chongqing for a year, I still felt that it was a familiar and loving place, as long as my home was there. I shook my head and said I would never come back this time. This is the first time I have been so tough about leaving another place.
after a while, my father said that our generation pays the most attention to falling leaves and returning to their roots. When people are over half a century old, they will always fall leaves and return to their own places. At that time, my father looked at me, and I saw a little pleading in my father's eyes. I remember what my sister told me. Dad is a man who likes to run around, but he has never separated the family. Suddenly, my heart is sour. It turned out that so many years have passed. You are no longer the high-spirited teenager, but a tired father who wants to go home and is afraid that his son won't.
You are always waiting silently in your heart, waiting for your son to turn around and find your love, figure it out with your heart, and understand each other with you, waiting for "one day you will understand."
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