After reading Li Qingzhao again, I read that the poet lived alone in Hangzhou, Shaoxing, Jinhua and other places in his later years, and the evening scenery was bleak, so I felt sorry for the case. Especially when I think of when the poet died and where he was buried, there is no trace to be found, which is even more sentimental.
Li Qingzhao's wandering life began at the age of 44.
Li Qingzhao, who was born near Liuxu Spring in Jinan, was widely read since childhood. At the age of 18, she married Zhao Mingcheng, a former student, in Bianjing. After living in Bianjing for six years, Li Qingzhao, 24, and her husband were forced to return to Qingzhou's private life because of the struggle between the old and new parties in the imperial court. At the age of 25, Li Qingzhao named her house "Huilaitang" and renamed it "Yi 'an Jushi". At the age of 38, her husband went to Laizhou from Qingzhou, and then to Zizhou at the age of 42. In those days, the couple were in the same boat through thick and thin, and * * * enjoyed themselves by collecting lost ancient inscriptions.
The wind and cloud arose and the waves were sharp. After the change of Jingkang in 1127, Li Qingzhao crossed Jiangning with her husband, at the age of 44. A southern crossing became a turning point in Li Qingzhao's life. After crossing the south, Li Qingzhao not only began to have cracks in her relationship with her husband, but also suffered from running around for a long time. From then on, her weak heart suffered, and the gorgeous lyrics began to become miserable.
In February, 1129, Wang Yi, the ruler of Jiangning Imperial Camp, rebelled. Zhao Mingcheng, a magistrate of Jiangning, was so alarmed that he left Li Qingzhao, 46, and escaped by climbing a rope from the wall alone. At dawn, the rebellion was put down, and Zhao Mingcheng was dismissed by the court for dereliction of duty. In Li Qingzhao's view, the cowardly performance of her husband when he was in danger was understandable, but he ignored the life and death of his wife who had been caring for each other for 28 years and flew alone when the disaster came, but Li Qingzhao could not let go for a long time, leaving the first painful shadow in Li Qingzhao's heart.
in may 1129, Zhao Mingcheng, who was in guichi county, Anhui province, received an imperial edict to know Huzhou. Zhao Mingcheng left Li Qingzhao to take care of a large number of books and cultural relics brought by Nandu, and went to his post alone. In the scene of husband and wife's temporary farewell, Li Qingzhao recalled in "Preface to the Records of the Golden Stone" that Zhao Mingcheng "looked at the boat and said goodbye. I was so disgusted that I shouted,' What if there is a rumor that the city is in a hurry?' The halberd replied from a distance,' Follow the crowd. If you have to, you must first abandon the trench, the second clothes and quilts, the second scrolls of books and the second ancient utensils. Those who are the only so-called sacred utensils can hold them on their own and live and die. Don't forget them. " I rushed to the horse. " In the husband's mind, the life and death of his wife is not as important as those objects, which has caused unspeakable sadness to Li Qingzhao.
I got sick on the way to Zhao Mingcheng, and when I arrived in Jiankang, I was seriously ill. Li Qingzhao wrote in the Preface to the Records of the Stone Inscription that Zhao Mingcheng was "critically ill in paste blindness. I sobbed and couldn't bear to ask about the funeral. August 18th, so sorry. Take a pen and write a poem, and end it. There is no intention of selling shoes. " Amid Li Qingzhao's crying and bitterness, a 28-year marriage ended.
Li Qingzhao was 46 when Zhao Mingcheng died. Since then, Li Qingzhao has been wandering around like catkins caused by the wind, helpless, burdened with the great misfortune of the country's ruin and the death of her husband, walking alone in the vast world, only the songs of life will accompany her forever.
in 1132, 49-year-old Li Qingzhao remarried Zhang Ruzhou in desperation and loneliness. But soon divorced, and began to wander alone.
What kind of life did the poets of that time lead? "The phoenix tree stands in front of the door, and the yellow leaves dance in the autumn wind." Life is helpless, and the poet with a sad heart looks at his hometown from afar, but "a thousand worries are hard to send." Heaven and earth are long, why should I be alone? I always shed tears of vicissitudes of life, and drank the turbid wine until I "put the wine out at dusk." However, after "holding your head and waking up", it is still "misty clouds and sorrow forever"; Staring at the window, "gazing at the place, adding a new sorrow from now on"; I want to board a boat for fun, but I'm also afraid that the boat will not move and I will have a lot of worries ... The lingering melancholy clouds are constantly shrouded and rolling in the poet's heart with frosty hair. This scene, as Cai Wenji in the Eastern Han Dynasty sang in "Eighteen Beats of Hu Jia": "God has eyes, why don't you see me wandering alone?"
We talk about the civil service system in Song Dynasty because it greatly elevated the status of literati. However, under such a cultural atmosphere, we also heard the howl of pain from Su Shi when he was tortured in prison, and also saw the gaunt figure of Li Qingzhao wandering around alone.
during their journey to the south, Li Qingzhao and his wife carried a large number of ancient scrolls of gold and stone, but all of them were lost during their exile, and only the Record of Gold and Stone, which was soaked in their hard work, still exists. In 1134, Li Qingzhao completed the writing of Preface to the Records of the Stone, which was six years after her husband's death. The 51-year-old Li Qingzhao couldn't help crying: "Today's hands are as new as ever, and the tomb has been arched, so sad!" , "thirty-four years, suffering gains and losses, how much! However, it is natural that there must be something, and there must be some gathering. "
in 1143, Li Qingzhao, who was 6 years old, formally presented thirty volumes of Jin Shilu to the court. This is the crystallization of the couple's life-long struggle. Perhaps in Li Qingzhao's view, this is the work of the couple's name in history. But she didn't know that what really made people remember her forever was the few poems she left to future generations. Those poems soaked with blood and tears also established her position in the Song Dynasty.
The old and frail, lonely poetess, in the midst of war and turmoil, can only lift a pen full of sorrow and ink, write a sad and emotional elegy, and chat with * * *. In those days, absolute beauty, a talented woman with wine friends and poetry lovers, can only stand in the west wind and yellow flowers and express her bitterness and bitterness. There is no longer the interest of "returning to the boat at night", no longer the interest of "raising a glass and laughing until the tea overturns", only the heavy sadness of missing the past and falling alone.
However, Li Qingzhao is not completely depressed. With so many misfortunes, she will never show weakness: "Life is an outstanding person, and death is a ghost hero"; She is willing to die for the restoration of the Central Plains: "I am willing to send blood and tears to rivers and mountains to sprinkle a Y soil in Qingzhou." Poets who live at home and worry about their country, hate and frustration still reflect the strength and beauty of life, and constantly pluck the strongest sound of the string of life.