Ghosts knock at the door in the middle of the night, and passers-by want to die.
If relatives and friends in Luoyang ask each other, they will say that I have gone to America.
Mochow has no bosom friend in the future, and the sea is full of flowers.
Living is a hero, and dying is love.
I advise you to drink one more glass of wine. There is no one on the road.
Peacock flies southeast, I'll chase it.
Go out and laugh, (come back depressed)
The conference semifinals dared not go south to herd horses, so they had to go north to resist Japan.
Clear water produces hibiscus, game-writing protocol washes silver gun.
The desert is lonely and straight, and it bends when the wind blows.
Pick some and don't forget to add the best to us.
2. Adapted from Mulan poem Haw Fu Haw of Chen She Uprising. Mulan flies a plane. What kind of plane is she flying? Boeing 747!
Ask the woman what she thinks and what she remembers. The woman is also very thoughtful and has no money to buy a plane. Last night, she saw the military post. She needed bombers and 12 planes, but she couldn't afford a rack. Grandpa doesn't have much money, and Mulan doesn't have gold or silver. She is willing to buy steel and build an airplane from now on.
I buy drawings in the East City, screws in the West City, glass in the South City and iron sheet in the North City. I said goodbye to my parents and stayed in the old garage at dusk, but I didn't hear the female voice called by my parents, but I heard the sound of iron rubbing. I bid farewell to the hangar and went to the barracks at dusk. I didn't hear my parents calling for a female voice, but I heard the general shouting hahaha.
Wan Li flew a plane, but he never turned off the mountain once. The hot air spread to the wings and the sun shone on the glass. The general was scared to death, and the soul of a strong man had already flown away.
Flying into the sky, the son of heaven is lying in a hospital bed. The director turned twelve times and gave them a slap in the face. Khan asked him what he wanted, but Mulan didn't want to go into the cell. I want to fly back to my hometown.
When parents heard the girl coming, they picked up the machine gun. As soon as Sister A heard that Sister Mei was coming, she raised her hand and raised her gun. I heard that my sister was coming, so I sharpened my knife and turned mentally retarded. I opened the cabin door, hid in my plane, took off my wartime robe, put on my flight suit, put on more grenades, and put on a machine gun outside. When I went out to bury the bomb, my relatives and friends were surprised: after twelve years, I didn't know Mulan was crazy.
The madman pedaled on the ground, the idiot closed his eyes, and they walked side by side. Who can say I'm not normal?
3. Funny sketch adapted from the first grade classical Chinese: Going to school Liu: Going to class, going to class.
Jia: Class, class, hurry up. Liu: Hello, monitor.
Jia: Hello, I heard that there is a new head teacher in our class, who is still a woman. Liu: No matter whether it's a man or a woman, drive her away when she comes.
Jia: Yes. Sister: Hi, how are you two?
Jia Liu: Good morning! Elder sister: You're here so early. Hey, have you heard that there is a new head teacher in our class? Jia Liu: I know, I know, I already know.
Elder sister: Yes, and it's a woman. Jia Liu: I know, I know.
Elder sister: Why don't we fuck her later? Give her a nickname.
Liu: Not bad, not bad. That's a good idea. What's that nickname?
Elder sister: it's called morning glory. Liu: Morning glory, too vulgar, too vulgar, too vulgar.
Jia: How about this? Let's call her old hen. Elder sister: Ah, old hen.
Jia: Yes. Liu: Bird flu is particularly serious now.
Also, dare to call an old hen. Elder sister: That's what you should call it! Jia: That's it, Liu&; Sister: OK, OK, OK, OK, OK.
Jia: Good idea. Will you cheer later? (pointing to C) Sister: I won't scream.
Jia: Then your name is (pointing to A) Liu: Me neither. Jia: Then if you don't scream, neither will she. Who screams? Elder sister: Er, yes, Lao Ji will come in a minute. Tell her to call.
She is the best in our class. Jia: Well, good idea, good idea.
Liu: Good idea. Jia: Ji, Ban, Ban, Ban.
Ji: I'm coming. (Singing) ~ ~ What are you laughing at? Never seen a beautiful woman. Jia: Er, er, Lao Ji.
Ji: Yes. Jia: There is a new head teacher in our class.
We nicknamed her old hen. She will come later. You can scream.
Ji: I don't call. Jia: Why? Ji: You always lie to me. Every time I speak, you shut up.
Jia: No, I won't lie to you this time. Liu & Sister: Yes.
Jia: We screamed together. Jia & Sister: Mm-hmm.
Ji: Don't lie to me this time, A stream &; Elder sister: OK, I won't lie to you this time. Call together.
Ji Hao, let's scream together. Jing: Hello, I'm the new head teacher.
It is said that the students in this class are particularly difficult to teach, but I am very caring and I will influence them with my love. Hello, classmates! Liu Jijia & Elder Sister: Old.
Ji: Hen. Jing: Which classmate scolds the old hen, please step forward.
(ABC steps back together) Boys and girls, please stand up. Ji: Yes.
Jing: Classmate, you can stand firm. Ji: Teacher, the ground is uneven.
Jing: Little classmate, why do you call me an old hen? Ji: I won't tell you Jing: I have confidence and patience.
Students, please go to the office with the teacher. Ji: What for? Jing: The teacher invites you to eat chocolate.
Ji: Really? Jing: Really, come on. Ji: Yes, let's eat chocolate.
Jia: Eh, this is called old hen eating chocolate? Sister: Yes, I know where we are called. Liu: Exactly.
Kim: I'll treat you to chocolate, Dove and Di Chin. Eat and eat. You are full. (Come out) I never punish students.
Son, you can come out now. Ji (singing) Jia: Hey, what's wrong with you? Laoji
Sister: Ji, are you all right? Ji: The teacher hits people. Sister Jia Liu: Come and have a look.
Liu: Well, are you badly hurt? Jia: Do you play hard? Jing: Next, the teacher will give you 1 class. Come on, boys and girls, please stand up. Ji: Why me again? Kim: I'll establish an online contact with you. Who can answer, please raise your hand to answer.
Please listen carefully. The first part is: Nantong North Tongzhou, and North Tongzhou can be north and south. Who can answer this question? Okay, you're the only female classmate? Liu: East pawnbroker, West pawnbroker and East pawnbroker are things.
Kim: Well, that's a good answer. Who else can raise their hands and answer? Little classmate, raise your hand and you can answer. Come on, please stand up and answer.
Ji: Answer what? Jing: Answer couplets. Ji: What couplets? Scene: The first part is: Nantong North Tongzhou, and the north and south Tongzhou can be north and south.
Ji: Boys and girls, boys and girls learn from men and women. Jing: It rhymes. That's a good answer
Please, can the teacher ask you one more question? Fragrant flowers are not red, red flowers are not fragrant, and they are rosy and fragrant. Ji: Farts don't stink, farts don't ring, and serial farts stink.
Jing: Monitor, don't fart. Ji: Good people, thank you.
Jing: What kind of students? E: Monitor, look, the celebration is coming. What programs have our class prepared? Jia: What we prepared for the teacher was recitation. Jing: Let's recite one first.
Jia: First of all, we recited the works for the teacher. In the spring morning, I woke up easily.
Liu: Birds are singing everywhere around me. Sister: But now I remember that night, that storm.
Ji: The roof is going to collapse. Kim: (d) You have changed. Will you change? Kim: Who taught you that? Ji: The monitor taught me.
Ji: Why do you always hit me? Jing: I made a mistake as soon as I found you? Jia: Teacher, please stop fighting. The headmaster is here. Kim: The headmaster is here.
Sister Jia Liu: Lao Ji, run. (end).
4. Adapted from classical Chinese sketch script, the martial arts of candlelight, retired from Qin Shi Time: 630 BC Location: Qin Jun Daying in the south of Surabaya. Character: Candlewick Wu, Qin Bo, bodyguard [curtain rises] (bodyguard pulls open the curtain and bows) bodyguard: Your Majesty, Zheng Guo Candlewick Wu asks for an audience.
(Qin Bo stops writing, looks up slightly and thinks) Qin Bo: Xuan. (Guards go out, candlelight enters) The power of candlelight: (Bow) See Qin Bo.
Qin Bo: (majestically) No ceremony. The power of candles: Xie Qinbo.
Qin Bo: What brings you to my Qin Ying? Candlelight: Now Qin Jin's army is coming, ready to besiege Zheng, knowing that Zheng is going to perish. (Qin Bo smiles) The power of candles: (with a serious face) Dear Qin Bo, if it is really good for you to destroy our state of Zheng, then you will be in trouble! (Pause for a moment) But is it easy to cross the State of Jin and take Zheng on the other side as your boundary? Qin Bo: (touching his beard for a moment) What do you mean? Candlelight: There is also a state of Jin between Zheng and Qin. If Zheng was destroyed by the state of Jin, wouldn't it become the territory of this neighboring country? Your state of Qin is far from Zheng. Then how do you solve this problem? (Glancing at Qin Bo carefully, Candlewick Wu) All the soldiers came all the way to Zheng, only to increase the land for the State of Jin. Is it worth it? (Speed up) If the neighboring countries are strong, the national strength of your State of Qin will be weakened a lot! (Qin Bo frowned) Qin Bo: You sound reasonable.
The power of candles: (exulting) Xie Qinbo! If you are willing to give up attacking Zheng, I am willing to make our country the master of your Oriental Road. (Pause for a moment)-When the envoys of the State of Qin pass by, Zheng Can will supply the materials they need at any time.
I think, for Qin Bo, there is nothing to lose. Qin Bo: (thinking) Your suggestion is worth considering.
But I have an appointment with the state of Jin. How can I go back on my word easily? Candlelight: (unhurriedly) I don't know if you still remember that you were very kind to Kim, and Kim promised to give you a gift. However, don't you know that he crosses the Yellow River in the morning and builds walls at night? Now he wants to regard Zheng as the eastern border, and he will continue to expand the border to the west, which is bound to infringe upon the interests of Qin! Qin Bo: (with a scowl) Hum! Our state of Qin was damaged, and his state of Jin benefited. Damn it! (After pacing around for a while) Well, he is not kind, why should I keep my righteousness! Wu to the candle: So ... Qin Bo: I want to take someone home.
Does the promise between us still count? The power of candles: (excited but polite) Xie Qinbo! I'll visit you again another day and formally sign a Covenant with Qin Bo. I hope Qin Bo will allow me to see you then! (Both laugh) Qin Bo: Haha! All right! (The candle goes out gradually).
When I was in middle school, I found a spoof article linking ancient Chinese, but the website Baidu was not allowed to post it, and neither was the content. Please leave an email. Text: The gentleman said: Oh, let a man with spirit take risks in his favorite place, fuck a thousand songs and make a sound.
On the evening of 20061October 12, General Xiang Chong set off happily. Just as my fair lady has nothing to do with pleasure, she suffers from chaos and lack of sleep.
Take off your clothes and want to sleep, revealing your breasts. When a general is in his prime, he will leap forward in policy.
From the mouth, straight through the outside, not through the disease. She brushed the strings, twisted slowly, swept and plucked. On the other hand, she gradually heard the sound of water gurgling between the two peaks.
The woman was not happy either, so the general persevered and made great efforts, and her daughter surged, making a huge soup sound, ringing up and down, wailing for a long time and howling: "Alas! Ha ha! Ouch! Ha ha. How happy I am! What a pleasure! " The average shooter is no longer quiet, sitting there with his hands touching Yin Qi and sighing. The next day, the general reported to the first emperor, who called it energy.
Her daughter has less leisure in the second month and twice as busy in May. Her name ranks first in the list of musicians, winning her fickle fate.
If the guest has air holes, don't bend your fingers when you fly to gargle. The first emperor waved his whip to the east, saying, "One man can keep it, but ten thousand people can't force it!" Therefore, the first emperor and his daughter boarded the building.
His daughter gave birth to Ceng Yun, and she is still singing Flowers. The first emperor sighed: "It's not that chrysanthemums are preferred among flowers, but that there is no bloom!" Finally, you get a chrysanthemum.
However, the daughter is full of resentment, such as admiration. The first emperor hesitated, and she was worried about advancing and retreating. Her daughter is exhausted and doesn't know the heat. She was tired and tired, and suddenly it was windy and rainy, and the spring was harmonious. Fortunately, it's even awkward.
His daughter sobbed, "It's immoral to come and not go!" Therefore, if you want to tell the first emperor, the first emperor will be defeated and flee, saying, "Jade can be seen from a distance, not ridiculous." The reason is considerable. If the husband is a lady, so is the poet.
So be patient, do whatever you want, and go it alone for hundreds of years. This so-called relaxation is moderate and invincible.