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2: Wrong. In the first sentence, there is nothing horizontal in the blank of 246 words, so in the next sentence, the position of the word Qiaoshuixi is even and even, but the word Qiaoshuixi is also even and even.
3. Three tones: Listening to Western Qin, the rhythm is gentle. You can't use it like this in modern poetry. This is a taboo.
4. Remedy the mistake: making drunken wine by folding flowers is just a dream in life.
Pingping Pingping Pingping Pingping Pingping Pingping.
When Qin brewed the drunken fairy wine, the word Pingsheng should be used, but after using the word "Xusheng", the position of the dream word must be remedied by Pingsheng, but the dream word is Xusheng, which the landlord may not understand.
5. According to the original poem, the 23 rd sentence has not lost its adhesion, but if the second sentence is leveled, it is necessary to pay attention to losing its adhesion. It is suggested to change the first sentence.
I only see these, and I can add others.
The landlord's writing style is still good, and he has expressed his thoughts. The refinement of characters needs to be improved. Let's go