A nurse pushed the door in, pulled out the needle inserted in her mother's arm, tied it on several infusion bottles, stopped infusion for her mother, and pushed the infusion hanging rod to the wall.
She finished all this silently, without any explanation, and turned to leave.
This means that the hospital has completely given up.
Eldest brother watched her unplug the pipe and asked me with red eyes, "Sister, is it really useless?" Say that finish, tears came out.
I also shed tears and went to hug him without saying anything.
In fact, everyone already knows the answer, but no one wants to admit it until the last moment.
Mother has been dying for more than two days.
When I was in a coma, I called her in her ear. She could hardly open her eyes, and she looked dazed and confused, as if she had come back from a far place, and it took a lot of effort to remember who she was.
Later, when I called her, whether it was "Mom-"or her name, she didn't have any conscious response.
She seems to be on her way, and no one can call her.
At the last moment, the hospital was ready for the joint department to carry out the dying rescue, that is, to cut the trachea for ventilation and put on various instruments and equipment to artificially prolong life, but I refused.
My mother suffered a lot, so why worry about the conscience of us living people and get the peace of her old man's house before she dies?
Later, I heard the nurse say behind her back in the bathroom: "... the girl in her bed ... ……XX was fine and didn't let her save her. Hey, it is also a sin to rescue again! "
Breathing difficulties and dying with a loud breath brought deep despair to the family.
Ears, a small tape recorder, a solemn hymn, I don't know if she can hear it, I just want to help her soul rise and go where she yearns. ?
2.
I was hurried back by my dad's phone call.
He called me first to ask if I was busy and had time to go home. Near the end of the year, I want to go back in 2008, so I have no plans.
Two days later, he called again and said, "Your mother misses you very much. Can you come back? "
This phone call is very unusual. You know, at that time, parents usually tried to persuade foreign children not to go home and work in peace, just for fear that their children would spend money.
After receiving this shady call, I realized that the situation was serious, so I asked for leave from the leader and flew back.
My brother took me home first. Dad was at home and told my mother that she had been in hospital. Maybe she has terminal cancer and will have surgery tomorrow.
I was stunned, stunned. I imagined all kinds of situations, but I never thought it was like this.
My mother is in good health. Every morning, she gets up before dawn and goes to the river to exercise. Tai Ji Chuan and Tai Chi Sword are like one day all the year round, and they seldom catch a cold all the year round. When I was at home, she laughed that I caught a cold easily and my health was not as good as hers. How do you say upside down? Impossible, I doubt it.
"How did you get this disease?"
They said the illness came suddenly. First, one leg feels uncomfortable, and it hurts a little when walking. Later, it became more and more painful and I couldn't walk. I went to the hospital for a check-up. It's a malignant tumor, and it's developing rapidly. Now it has metastasized to the brain and cancer cells have been found. Have an operation tomorrow and see how hopeful it is. There is little hope unless there is a miracle.
"Does my mother know?" I asked.
"I know a little, but I didn't tell her everything."
I am extremely shocked, but I still have to go to the hospital to see my mother at once. I gathered my emotions and went to the hospital. I still haven't reacted. I always thought there should be a miracle. ?
3.
I opened the door of the ward and saw my mother half lying talking to her roommate, her face flushed. Seeing me come in, she immediately smiled and introduced to her roommate, "My girl is here!" "
She is a cheerful person and smiles everywhere she goes.
My family lived on the fifth floor, when there was no elevator. Basically, as soon as she enters the corridor, you will know that she is back, greeting her neighbors while walking, and laughter spreads from the first floor to the fifth floor.
She saw that I wanted to sit up, and I helped her. She said, "I'll do it myself." I feel that she is strong and has a good figure.
I really have a feeling that we will go back a few days after we first came here.
But this is not the case.
Her face is rosy because she will have an operation tomorrow. She just lost a lot of blood. In fact, in malignant tumors, white blood cells have dropped very low, and it is often necessary to inject the specific drug "Shengbaixin" to raise white blood cells.
I haven't seen my mother for a while, either. I met her and talked affectionately.
My uncle's house is near, and he came from other places to help take care of my mother before me.
My mother and brother are very close.
My uncle is considerate and everyone takes turns to do things, but he doesn't think the ward is pessimistic.
However, the situation took a turn for the worse the next day. ?
4.
Early the next morning, my mother was carried into the operating room. Before I went in, I said to her in her ear, "Mom, you are really popular. You have a good personality." She smiled too.
The operation lasted eight hours. The doctor said, open the abdominal cavity, the tumor is full, ask the family members for advice, do you want to have surgery. My dad means, can you do it or not? You can't give up treatment.
Many years later, as the father of traditional Chinese medicine, he discovered the anti-tumor effect of Ganoderma lucidum. He said many times, "didn't your mother know at that time?" If I had known this, it would be effective to sprinkle Ganoderma lucidum powder in the abdominal cavity to inhibit the spread of tumors. " He may also regret his surgery, which made my mother suffer so much, but it didn't work.
But in that case, who dares to give up treatment?
When I was carried out from the operating room after the operation, I was deformed and had no strength. I was soaked in a pool of water, sweating like a pig in a hospital gown, and collapsed to the ground.
Several of us carried her to bed together. No urination, catheter and urine bag.
Then, the surgical wound is too big, and after the anesthetic fails, there is only endless pain and people have no strength.
My mother has always been a very strong person and has never heard her complain about being tired. She can carry everything by herself. At that time, she complained to me: "This is to beat people to death. When will it end? "
I can only go to the nurse again and again to ask for Demerol.
The nurse said that Demerol has side effects and is addictive.
I said, that helps, at least the patient feels better.
The patient is extremely sensitive to his illness. Basically, the great pain after the operation and the reaction of the doctors almost made my mother lose her will to survive. ?
5.
My mother told me that she wanted to eat soaked cowpeas. That's probably asking for exposure before people die.
I searched all over the streets and lanes, but I didn't find pickled cowpeas, only pickled cabbage. She was a little disappointed and wanted to lose her temper, but she didn't.
In fact, not long ago, she pickled a large jar of eggplant and leek at home as winter rice and told me to scoop it out for my neighbors to eat, saying that it would go bad if it was soaked for a long time.
She always helps others and doesn't want to bother others. I think this is the last request she made to me. I didn't satisfy her!
Why don't I have someone look for it?
We are too used to the efforts of our elders to satisfy us and don't know how to be considerate of our elders.
A good classmate of mine heard about this situation and contacted me to say that he would come to the hospital to see my mother. I didn't expect my mother to be so quick, so she was polite and didn't let me come.
Go back to the hospital and tell my mother that my classmate XX is coming to see you, but I didn't let him. My mother listened and wanted to say something, but she didn't say it.
Regret afterwards: Why didn't I let him visit my mother? It is not too much trouble for others, but it is a great comfort for those who are about to say goodbye to this world, isn't it? How precious the fate between people is!
I really owe two people. ?
6.
I never thought that my mother would die so early. My mother just turned 50 and I'm 26.
I thought she would live to be over 70 at most.
Actually, my mother is in poor health. It is true that she won't catch a cold. This is a good result of years of exercise, but as soon as she got it, she became seriously ill.
She suffered from severe eye disease, uveitis, and almost lost her sight at the worst. At one time, her eyesight was only 0. 1. When people passed by her, she couldn't see who it was.
At that time, we were young. My father sold the stamps he had accumulated when he was young and took his mother to Hangzhou and Shanghai to see a doctor.
Later, my eyesight was preserved, but it was only 0. 1-0.3.
In this way, my mother still uses her spare time to buy food every day and send it to the elderly at home.
She bought good food in the morning and ran for two days after work. Once she went to her mother-in-law's house, she put down her food, and once she went to her mother's house, she put down her food. Take care of both sides
She suffered from lupus and had her tonsils removed. I remember going to the hospital to see her once when I was a child. She just had her tonsils cut and the cotton wool in her throat was red. Then what milk therapy, hormone therapy, people get fat.
Before that, she was a good singer and dancer. She has a good sense of music and accurate intonation, and can listen to any song. When I was in primary school, I found that she had a thick collection of hymns, and the score was very simple. "Amen-"always ends with such a sentence.
This is a light of sympathy for her miserable life. Thank god!
My voice is a little hoarse when I cut my tonsils, and I don't make much noise when I sing. The song can't be sung, so she goes to the river to exercise every day. She can learn any boxing and fencing as soon as she learns it. She carries a tape recorder and plays boxing music. She played in front and a group of people followed her. On a holiday, I followed her to Baita Mountain for exercise and followed them to study. One of them said, "Look, you are not as soft as your mother." I rolled my eyes angrily. I don't want to play so soft. I will never take part in their square dance again. But it really convinced my mother.
She suffered a lot in her life, physically.
I sometimes wonder how she ate all the hardships at home by herself.
Later, I studied the arrangement of family system with the German psychologist Mr. Hellinger. He once said: "The child who is sick and most painful at home is the one who loves most."
She always suffers before she enjoys it. If she stays like this for a long time, others will take it for granted and stop thanking her.
What she bears seems to be that she is willing to put the cause and effect of the whole family on her shoulders and put their karma on herself. And her situation at home is like being alone without allies.
No one can stand such an environment. I tried, but I couldn't stand it and had to leave far away. ?
7.
What do you mean, she's alone Because the relationship between the two in-laws is not harmonious
As we all know, Chinese marriage is not the combination of two people, but the reorganization of two families, and it is whether the two families can accept each other.
My grandparents' intellectual family came from bureaucrats in the old society. Once, my grandfather was beaten into a "ghostly", and my father was not allowed to go to college because of this, but his pride remained. My grandparents' family is an ordinary citizen's family, and their knowledge is a little shallow. At that time, my grandfather was exiled to Xinjiang.
Different families have different ways and concepts to deal with things, but the biggest problem of China family is being reasonable and not loving. We must strive for a right or wrong between parents and family, so Ren can't close the case in the near future. The differences are getting bigger and bigger.
When I was a child, my grandparents brought me up and had deep feelings. I naturally stand on this side, and I don't allow my mother to speak ill of my grandparents and make my mother angry. How sad it is that the child conceived in October is not close to himself.
I don't want to embarrass them, but they must be embarrassed. what can I do?
In fact, the child's heart is the most sensitive.
Hellinger said that the child's spirit is half his father's family and half his mother's family. When parents are separated, the child's spirit is split in the middle.
That's true. If half discriminates against the other half, your spirit will split, and you can't be a sane child. As if in the endless night, and as if in the bottomless icehouse. I can't stand it, and I'm so ashamed. It is such a state of mind.
Why reason at home and distinguish right from wrong? Isn't it a great kindness to be at home? People entrust life and death to each other and have children together. Why should they care about right and wrong? What can't be solved under the premise of love?
Our country really lacks marriage and childbearing civilization. From the traditional culture, there is no systematic marriage and love civilization. Although there is a saying that "husband and wife quote Qi Mei", this is only a description of the ideal state, and there is no institutional support at all.
As long as there is no fundamental civilization, a civilized system cannot be regarded as an advanced civilization.
I think this is a serious injury to our traditional civilization. It is also the fundamental reason why this civilization has repeatedly failed to win an overwhelming victory.
The biggest darkness in a child's heart is that parents can't be one.
Parents can be imperfect people or imperfect parents, which are not fatal. As long as you love each other, this is heaven and a warm home. ?
8.
My mother has told me many times that she agreed to go out with my father and get married because she is compassionate.
At that time, my dad's family was already a "ghostly" with bad family composition, and my dad was introverted. But when my father chased my mother, he wrote her a little poem, which touched my mother and made her feel great sympathy and love.
I believe my mother is telling the truth. She is a soft-hearted and kind person.
She said that when my father took her home to meet her parents, my grandparents were very happy to see her.
But then, after I gave birth to the boss, they started to make trouble. For this reason, when my mother was pregnant with my eldest brother, she was in a bad mood and wanted to have an abortion instead of having this baby. As a result, my eldest brother got sick and almost died.
I grew up in my grandparents' parents, and the old couple loved each other. I was lucky enough to escape the troubles and misfortunes caused by my parents' face-to-face quarrel.
When I had a concept of the relationship between parents, it was already the senior grade of primary school. I go back to my parents' home once on weekends, but I often meet them and break up in discord. Sometimes you have to invite grandpa to judge right and wrong.
Both sides are my relatives, and my mother, as the weak one, obviously didn't get enough love and protection.
This made me feel alienated from them. Facing my parents, I can do nothing but watch.
However, children are parents' children after all, and you can't pretend to turn a blind eye; Your spirit can't be unaffected.
Later, after I systematically studied the concept of marriage and love in the Bible, I felt for countless times that people were not educated in the correct concept of marriage and love, which was the main reason for the marriage tragedy in China, Chichiwa.
People don't lack a lover and a love, but love from top to bottom. The river of love dried up.
Some people feel that fatherly love is seriously lacking, because your father can't inherit the complete love from his father, and he can't provide it himself.
In this way, it was passed down from generation to generation in want.
Throughout all the developed countries in the world today, there is not a country that does not put the relationship between husband and wife in the first place in interpersonal relationships.
This is both a secular mystery and a spiritual mystery.
God gives people rich love and blessings through family blood, and connects people's spirits through marriage.
These principles are clearly stated and repeatedly emphasized in the Bible. "People should leave their parents, combine with their wives and become one." This puts the importance of husband-wife relationship above parents and family.
Unfortunately, many people have never left family of origin, and they have maintained a more important relationship with family of origin than their own families. This kind of perversion is the main cause of family tragedy, so that your partner can't get the attention and respect that TA deserves.
"Husband, you should cherish your wife. Because she is with you and bears the grace of life, and she is weaker than you. "
"Wives, respect your husbands, because they are your heads."
These teachings are priceless.
If we can guide our marriage and family according to the principles of the Bible and cherish our family, we will have a happy family and a harmonious and healthy society.
9.
As children, we cannot judge our parents.
It is because of our parents that we are fortunate to be human beings and have precious lives. Parents' kindness to our life is extremely profound.
But if there is no continuous supply of God's love, all people will look for love in the details until they die. How pathetic!
God is love. Man lives not only by food, but also by God's word and his love.
God is our eternal spiritual pillar. Blessed are those who know this truth, so that they can break the curse imposed by the vicious circle and live in the abundant love of God.
Thank God, after going through the test, he chose me, and I hope he will choose you too.