The Reader is so popular that I haven't seen it before except the issue of Yu Xiuhua.
My family has always had the habit of reading aloud. From my husband to me and my son, reading aloud is really a spiritual enjoyment. Besides, I'm busy reading and writing, so I haven't read it.
When I visited Weibo two days ago, a video read by poet Yu Xiuhua was on the cover, with a crooked posture. I clicked on it out of curiosity.
Yu Xiuhua's sincere and hard-working voice slowly flowed out and read her poem "For You".
Every time I finish reading a sentence, I will be so tired that I stagger. Every poem is her inner cry and the crystallization of her feelings.
This poem is dedicated to those who she once liked and more people who will come into her life in the future.
It's touching that such a crooked person has struggled to read a poem.
Tears came down, and I was moved by the poetry of Yu Xiuhua's life. She is a person who writes poems all her life and finds the meaning of life with her majestic imagination.
02
Yu Xiuhua became famous as early as 20 15. What made her famous was her poem Sleeping with You Across Half China.
This poem became popular in the circle of friends and made her famous all over the country. She entered the public's field of vision with the attitude of "a poet with cerebral palsy and a peasant poet". Her collection of poems, The Amazing World, broke the publication record of poems.
At that time, she received so much attention and quickly became an "internet celebrity", more because of her bold poetry, which was a novel combination of "Cerebral Palsy and Poet".
After the novelty and gimmicks, how many people really want to know the people behind the poems?
To understand her life deeply, there are several words that can sum up her first half life, namely "cerebral palsy", "marriage", "poetry" and "divorce".
Before she became famous, her life was "crawling in the mud" as written in the early poem Impression.
Because of the birth reversal, resulting in congenital cerebral palsy, Yu Xiuhua was unable to move and almost lost the ability to control his destiny.
She is smart and studious, but her hands and feet are not as sensitive as ordinary people. Her hands are trembling, she stutters, and she walks unsteadily, which makes her extremely inferior and very concerned about the eyes of people around her.
In the second year of high school, she suddenly went home with a schoolbag and proposed to drop out of school. The reason is that the teacher gave her 0 points for "scribbling". She burned all the books, completely giving up the idea of studying.
But I didn't expect that more blows and insults came one after another in life, and there was no chance for her to breathe.
03
Yu Xiuhua, 19 years old, was arranged to get married by her parents just after dropping out of school, and wanted to find her a living support.
The other party is a son-in-law from Sichuan, older than her 13 years old. At that time, she didn't know what marriage was or even having children.
Twenty years of married life has brought her endless humiliation and made her full of doubts about marriage.
Her husband once said to her, "You are disabled, I am normal, and I am much more noble than you." I used to hit her, pull her hair and hit the wall.
He doesn't like her disability. Except for going home for the New Year, he works outside the home for the rest of the time, and his income has never been given to his family. It is conceivable that he later had another woman.
When her son was two years old, Yu Xiuhua filed for divorce for the first time, but when the words came out, her mother was the first to jump out and object because she was worried about her No Country for Old Men.
Since then, there has been no communication between them. In Yu Xiuhua's eyes, home is just the place where her husband spends the New Year. Even during the Spring Festival, in order to avoid quarreling, they don't sleep in the same room.
After becoming famous overnight, she made a big decision. At the end of 20 15, she ended her marriage of more than 20 years. At this moment, Yu Xiuhua has been waiting for 20 years.
For twenty years, she hated marriage, denounced her husband, and tried to maintain the legitimacy of this relationship under the persuasion of her parents.
In order to be free, she gave all the royalties of 6.5438+0.5 million yuan to her husband and promised to build a house for him.
She said, "In my life, I have never had any dreams, and I have no hope for life. If you must name one, it is divorce. The best thing about luck and glory in these years is divorce. "
"I have since entered my favorite lifestyle. Yes, I like this quiet day without quarrels and suspicions: a day alone. "
05
She has never had love, and she has always longed for love, but she has never got it.
She can only wait, waiting for one day, spring blossoms; Waiting for the man of my dream, for him, she can "sleep with you halfway across China".
In The Reader, Dong Qing asked her why there are so many love poems in your poems. Her bright answer is to make up for the deficiency.
"My physical appearance does not conform to the male aesthetic. When a person really loves me, I will immediately shrink back. "
Yu Xiuhua is sober about reality.
"A man in his thirties, when he is married, has to give birth to children for others. Don't even think about it. Successful men in their forties will find girls in their twenties, which is the general trend. What's the use of a man in his fifties? Do I still play erotic? " She said.
For her, love is more of an imagination and a comfort to loneliness.
Here's Yu Xiuhua's poem "For You" for everyone. May we all be in brave enough to love.
for you
yu xiuhua
A simple teahouse,
I like you as you are.
Your beard,
My tossing and turning face made me sad last night.
What I want to bring you is,
I lost almost all the way.
Except for the withered spring scenery outside the window
After meeting you,
You've always loved someone else,
one by one
I have no right to be jealous,
I can only escape again and again.
So I've been alive,
To wait for you to die.
When the crowd dispersed,
When the flame of your soul turns to ashes
I love you.
I want to hold you.
Leave your eroded body in the world.
I forgive you for hurting me again and again for them.
Because I love you.
I also have the heyday of desire,
There are many nights, and my body and mind are broken.
But I have never exiled myself.
I hope my body is as clean as my heart.
Even so,
I didn't come to see you.
When she read aloud.
Dong Qing's eyes were full of tears.