If you get hurt, you won't get better at once. Any wound takes time.
It is self-deception to say that you are not injured when you are obviously injured. You can't escape. You should learn to face it. Although it is hard to face, it will make you cry again and again, but you are treating your wound.
Of course, don't deliberately face it, let the scab break away naturally, and don't always expose it. We should try to avoid things related to it, such as changing the environment. If we can't avoid it, then face it and cry.
By the way, you are very poetic, but don't write such things, at least not until you adjust your mentality. Do more exercise, do some concrete things, get in touch with real people and have more rest.