1 m 65 has a graceful figure, although there is no trend of skinny beauty. Although the face doesn't look like a closed moon, it is also pure and lovely, especially a head of beautiful hair hanging over the shoulders, dark and dense, which is the extravagance of youth. I don't know if it is rational to describe my daughter like this, but there must be love in my words. In the eyes of a mother, the child is the most beautiful and the only one!
When writing these words, there is a mature breath pushing my sense of smell: my daughter has grown up! An adult daughter just went to college. Although it seems far from marriage, it is not far, just in the blink of an eye. But love should be in the present. Then I will talk to her about "love" today. And I want to talk about such a sensitive topic as a mother and an experienced person. Before speaking, I hesitated because I was worried that I could not achieve the expected effect, and I was even more afraid that my traction was not strong. But I still want to talk about it, without hesitation.
If you are faced with a blank sheet of paper, you can write as much as you want, your opinions and your reasons, but if there is a color on this blank sheet of paper that can cover the white, the result is self-evident. My daughter belongs to the latter. Although I don't want to be a blank sheet of paper in other aspects, I hope she is a blank sheet of paper from the point of view of love.
I know my daughter's emotional aesthetic tendency after I saw the photos of those Korean stars. To be honest, I didn't feel anything at first. Everyone has his own idol, especially children of the same age. But the later discovery puzzled me, and then I fell into a panic.
Kim Soo Hyun, Lee MinHo, Lee Jong Suk, Li Taiming ... It was through her that I learned these names, which were beyond my power. At first, all kinds of pictures were posted in different places, such as pencil boxes, textbooks, notebooks and schoolbags. Later, she hated TV dramas, but fell in love with Korean TV dramas. Of course, it is not the plot that attracts her, but the big-name movie star. It was not until she finally volunteered that she had to choose to learn Korean blindly. Although she obeyed the wishes of my husband and me on this important event, it was hard to hide her disappointment in her words, which showed that she was very sad. She also declared that if she was allowed to take an elective course at the university, she must learn Korean! After all, my daughter is still young and doesn't know the depth of society. The choice depends entirely on my preference. If it is for other reasons, I can understand, but for this reason, I feel a little decadent and empty and desolate. I thought that when she went to college, she would dilute these obsessions, but she didn't think it would get worse. Just look at her WeChat name "Li Taiming is my boyfriend" and you will understand everything.
These movie stars have penetrated into her daughter's life now. They covered her eyes like an invisible net, so that she could not see the farther direction; They are also engraved in her aesthetic tendency like stamps, and birthmarks cannot be deleted. I hope to believe that this worship is staged, not deeply rooted.
Aesthetic tendency is not a keyboard, there are so many orders and rules. I don't think of my daughter as my ideal self either. Once again, everything will fall into my will. But most importantly, these movie stars, I really don't think they are good. They look like Zhang Xiuqing's face carved in a mold and give me the feeling of being soft (such comments are personal, but they are true). The man in my subconscious should be Chen, tough, connotative and more like a man! Once I asked my daughter, "What do you like about them?" The daughter replied without thinking, "I don't need a reason to like it, just like my father likes you." I thought I had a lot of reasons to tell her about her emotional orientation, but she was impatient and disdainful. I know my words will be like sand in her ears, and she won't listen.
I just want her to get rid of the shadow of aesthetic tendency when she is in love. Of course, I don't insist, I just want to turn my experience into a light of enlightenment and bring her into Qingming.
My daughter used to have more than one boy confess to her, and sometimes her heart was excited or she cried. But I don't think this is even love, and the spring breeze can't blow the banner. Maybe yesterday was not suitable, but today is suitable. I think true love should start from college. So after my daughter entered the university, I conveyed my hope to her in a euphemistic or straightforward way.
Of course, the arrival of love can't be rehearsed. Love comes, you feel it, you will accept it gladly, but you can't go with the flow. People's feelings sometimes go wrong. In the process of getting along, a person's strengths and weaknesses will be reflected in the details, and will appear in an enlarged form in the communication with people. The choice depends on the priority of these shortcomings. If they are poor in character and weak in ability, they should be abandoned, otherwise, they should be taken in. I always feel that a person has no character and nothing; Without ability, you will treat yourself as a man in the future. If a man turns a woman into a man, then this woman will lose a lot of happiness as a woman. If it is something else, such as living habits, such as personality problems, these are not fatal, and many of them can be changed after time polishing, so don't care too much. As for the appearance, don't care too much, and you can't get stuck in the framework of Korean movie stars. In this way, you will miss a lot. Men, just look pleasing to the eye. You will live with a person in the future, not a face. If you are paranoid about the standard of the object of love, then the future happiness has been put to rest. Don't be too critical of others except character and ability. Think about your own problems, big or small, or even piles.
The premise of marriage is the rehearsal of love. Of course, if you can perform all your life without rehearsal, that's the best! But people don't just fall in love and get married. There are many variables in the process of love. To a great extent, love is a game. As long as the mentality is balanced, it is only a prelude to marriage, not to mention using the future years as a bargaining chip. So don't be afraid of failure, just refuse to fall in love. Enjoying the process of love is also a wonderful experience of life. You can see the sunshine and smell the fragrance. Perhaps, if you can't reach the finish line, there will be no scenery, but at least you still have the past, and these used to be fragments of your good memories. At least you can understand what kind of scenery suits you in the future. These conclusions, only if you have tried, can keep the lights on your love road and not be at a loss.
I have always felt that as long as I am in love, I have to invest, regardless of success or failure. I'm not worried about that! Daughter is a very emotional person.
Of course, I also want to tell my daughter that it is very important to have a relationship during college, but if you put too much energy into it, it will definitely affect your studies. After all, learning is your independent accumulation in the future, and it is also the capital of charm to some extent. I'm not worried about this, because I know my daughter is always awake at this point.
If you want to meet a good lover, you must be excellent first. The Excellence here is more about connotation than appearance. Kindness, gentleness and compassion, I don't worry about them. She has them all, and she can actively maintain them in her life and won't lose them. Some people say that personality determines your happiness index. My daughter's personality is still relatively easy-going, and everyone loves her, but her temper is a little urgent. She hasn't learned to hide her dissatisfaction, and sometimes she flies into a rage. This depends on the long-term tempering of life, and I don't have to worry too much.
In fact, I am most worried about the aesthetic tendency mentioned in the first half of the text. I have also observed my students and found that there are similar phenomena, but they are junior high school students, and their understanding is still in the stage of blindly chasing the wind. I can understand some crazy actions. But as a college student, if you are still so persistent, you really shouldn't. I hope she is just a form of infatuation, and don't take them as a yardstick to measure love.
It is often said by people around me that having a boy is more worry-free than having a girl. Boys can get married as long as they like, and girls have a lot to consider. I didn't agree with this view before, but now I have a deep understanding. Although my daughter is not old enough to talk about marriage, her anxiety is overwhelming.
When I started writing these words, I saw her head on WeChat, and the head of Korean movie star Lee Tae-ming was hanging in the light, so I sent her a WeChat: Don't let some people be your role models in love choice. If you only have one tree in your eyes, you will lose the chance to see other trees!