What is "good"?
First of all, understand what is "good". Take the Bible as an example. God promised to bless the best, but man chose the second best. For example, Isaac is the son promised by God, and Ishmael is the result of human choice, not what God promised. Although Ishmael can also make Abraham have descendants, it is the second best from God's point of view, and Isaac is the best.
For example, the land of Canaan was promised to Israel by God, while the land of Bashan east of Jordan was chosen by Israel. Although Bashan is rich in water and grass, it is not what God promised. From God's point of view, Canaan is the best and Bashan is the second best.
There is a problem here. "Excellence" is not what people think is good, but what God thinks is good. "Excellence" is not necessarily "spiritual+secular blessing", nor is it a list of conditions such as "five good men" as the world says. Of course, God's blessings are all-round, because all the blessings come from God. God loves us, and he is willing to give us the best wishes, including material blessings. However, there is also a question of sovereignty. God has absolute sovereignty. He can give it to us or not. He can show his glory through your wealth, or through your poverty and lack of money. Therefore, it is not impossible for us to ask for all blessings, including material blessings, but we should respect God's sovereignty, as Jesus said, "Please … but don't follow my wishes". Jesus set an example for us. We'd better follow Jesus' example, respect God's sovereignty in everything, understand and obey God's will.
How to get "goodness" from God?
Believe in God, and build your confidence on God's promises. God has many promises. He promises to help us and provide all our needs. Believing in God is infallible, even when he is on the road. When you say "I can't do it", your attitude should be "do it well" first. You must have a correct attitude and a willing heart towards God, and the Holy Spirit can help you do it.
Let god take power and obey him. Only in this way can you understand what God's will is, and only in this way can God interfere in your affairs.
Everything depends on God, and everything thanks to God. God takes the second best, and what God really wants to give you is the best. Therefore, only by relying on God can you experience the power of God and meet the goodness that God has prepared for you. Only by thanking God for everything can you overcome all the situations and the pain of failure.
Paying attention to what God values, what God values and what people value are often different. God values human heart, responds to God's attitude, humility, honesty and trust. People often value looks, appearance, temperament, speech, education, work treatment, material conditions and so on.
Only by adjusting your values to what God values, can you meet the "good" God has prepared for you, and you can recognize the "good" God has prepared for you.
People's favorite styles often become idols. God doesn't want us to worship idols. God wants to break our idols, so we will be lovelorn and fail. In a sense, the failure and frustration in marriage mate selection is that God is training us. If we are willing to learn the style of the Lord and bear the yoke of the Lord, then God will make a shaping work for us through the single period, and God is willing to give him to us as the "best" that suits us best.