I grew up in Fuzhou. From the beginning of being sensible, I felt that my life was not good, and I came from bad karma. Because when I was two years old, my father died in a reform-through-labour farm because of the Rightists. I have never seen my father since I was a child, and I have never called the word "dad". After dad died, his family was destroyed. My mother later left my father's house with my sister and me and gave my brother to my uncle. During the Cultural Revolution, my sister went to the countryside, my mother was sent to the countryside, and I lived in the city. Then my mother remarried. I have always felt sorry for myself since I was a child. I don't know why there is one more person in this world who nobody cares about. I remember playing in the street with my brother when I was three years old and being abducted. /kloc-when I was 0/2 years old, my blood was only half that of normal people! I am anemic because of severe malnutrition. I was very bitter and poor when I was a child, but I knew from an early age that the greatest pain in life is that there is no love! So I long for the warmth of my family. I remember once my grandmother came from the countryside and saw my miserable appearance. She said to me, "Son, you can't choose the nest where you were born, but you can build it in the future!" Unexpectedly, this sentence, in my young mind, has had a tremendous impact and brought me hope for life. I began to want to change my destiny, and I want to build a happy family for myself! 1975 after graduating from high school, China didn't go to college. I was assigned to a textile factory as a female worker for three years. 1977 after the resumption of the college entrance examination, I studied for the exam while working, and it took me two years to be admitted to Fujian Forestry College. Four years after graduating from college, I was assigned to work in a remote mountainous area. I prepare for the exam while working. I took the exam for two years and was admitted to the Northeast Forestry College as a graduate student. Two years later, I got another chance to study abroad. I remember I wrote to tell my mother that I was going abroad, and she wrote back and said, "Don't be whimsical! For generations, no one in our family has been abroad, and no one has been abroad; Our family has no money to support you! " She doesn't know that I got a full scholarship from the Canadian government, and the boss knows that I have no money, and even the round-trip ticket is ready for me! In this way, I went to Canada to study without spending a penny. 1986, flying from Beijing to Canada for the first time. At that time, I thought to myself, I am a thin little girl. In order to change my fate, I can go from the south of China to the north, and from the east of the world to the west! I think, the earth is only so big, as long as I work hard, there is nothing I can't do! I am really proud of myself, thinking that my fate has changed now and I can create a happy and beautiful future for myself! But my family background, deep in my heart, branded a deep sense of inferiority: my brother only went to the third grade of primary school, and my sister didn't graduate from junior high school. I was looked down upon by everyone since I was a child. Therefore, I feel inferior and proud. Besides, I didn't know until I went abroad that there are many talents behind this world! Many people are from famous universities. What am I? I stayed in Canada for ten years, got a degree, got a job, got married and had children. Ten years later, our family moved to America to pursue the "American Dream". My husband works as an engineer in the largest communication company in America, and I do scientific research in the largest pharmaceutical company in America. Two years later, we bought a villa and finally realized the "American Dream", with a house, a car, a ticket, a hat and a son. I think I finally built a beautiful nest for myself. 1986 I didn't hear the gospel when I went abroad. 1987, a foreigner showed the movie The Life of Jesus to several international students. After watching the movie, I secretly made a firm prayer: Lord Jesus, I am willing to open my heart, accept you as the Lord of my life and follow you from now on. But later, I put the Lord Jesus aside. Because I am busy with my studies, I have no time to go to church or study the Bible. Moreover, I feel that I have gone abroad and I am doing well without the help of the Lord Jesus. It was not until 1993 that I began to go to church for help because of the setbacks in my life and gradually got to know my God. I was baptized on 1997. Because I work in America, I have to drive for a long time every day, and I often see serious car accidents on the road. I think, if I die in a car accident, I must go to heaven and never go to hell! The Bible says that believing and being baptized will be saved! I think so, but I haven't been baptized yet. I'm not sure if I can be saved, so I asked to be baptized. Abroad, there are only two baptisms in a year: Easter (April) and Thanksgiving (165438+ 10). But I can't wait. I'm afraid that if something happens and I die, I won't be able to go to heaven. So the time when I was baptized was very special. It was August of 10. After being baptized, I feel at ease. I think: if I die, I will go to heaven, which is very beautiful; If I am alive, my nest on the ground is also good! I think I have everything I should have in my life, and I am very satisfied. Just believe in this god. When you need him, pray; When the prayer is answered, you will think: this god is really smart, useful and not bad! When prayers are not heard, you will think: Is there really a God? If so, will he care about me? You see, there are so many priests, preachers, brothers and sisters who love the Lord, and they are too busy to take care of God! What am I, a layman, not a descendant of the righteous? How can God care? Therefore, although I have accepted Jesus as the Lord of my life, I am still the real master. Because when I pray to God for something, I don't even know where God is. Therefore, although I go to church on Sunday and usually take part in group study, I have not established a personal intimate relationship with God. Therefore, if you have any pain, you should swallow it yourself, and if you have any burden, you should carry it yourself. You don't want to trouble God, and you don't believe that God will help me.