Everyone is inseparable from death when he is born. It is not until the day we die that we truly become one with it.
When I was five or six years old, I was already afraid of death. But when I think about it carefully, I don’t know what I’m afraid of. When I was a child, I grew up in a rural area. There lived an old woman living alone next door. Everyone called her "Qi Po". Her face is the embodiment of aging, with wrinkles all over her face, and all the hair that can be seen on her body has turned gray. She died when I was five years old. Qi Po's daughter came to the door and cried in mourning. She cried so hard that her voice became hoarse. But Qi Po couldn't hear her anymore. As a little girl, I stepped on the edge of the coffin and saw her lying motionless inside. I couldn't tell that her back was hunched.
Later, when I was seven or eight years old, I watched an old woman from the house next door being placed in a red coffin from the upstairs of someone else’s house. Except for the loss of a crying daughter, the scene was different from that of that time. The Qi Po is very similar. At this time I became more afraid of death. That coffin is just big enough for one person to lie in. How uncomfortable it would be to be suffocated after closing it!
Whenever I talk about the topic of "death" with people around me, some of them will change the topic, and some will say with a smile, "Hey! You've been talking about 'death' since you were so young." , as if talking about death also involves seniority. We just ignore death too much and end up being hit in the face by it. No one ever dictated that death only happened to people who were old or in a hospital bed.
Therefore, Montaigne wrote in his essay: "Isn't it a bit absurd to worry about such distant things now? How is this absurd! The old will die, and the young will die."
One day, death and farewell will come at the same time.
Every time I think of death, what follows is the sadness of farewell. Several times, I wanted to discuss this topic with my family. I find that almost everyone is trying to avoid the topic, "What's there to discuss?" Perhaps it is precisely because death will cruelly separate people who love each other. In addition to fear, there is also hatred.
No matter what feelings we have for it, death will come to everyone sooner or later, and so will farewell.
Death stalks each of us like a ghost, and sometimes looking back at it is not a bad thing.
We can get rid of many worries by learning to think about death. When I was in school, I didn't finish my homework, failed in the exam, failed in the college entrance examination, failed to apply for my choice, had to make up for the exam, etc. These are just like hateful curses lingering in my mind. After work, we fail to do what our superiors tell us, clients are dissatisfied with the plans we make, we don't get along well with colleagues, we face unemployment, etc., which makes us who are struggling become even more powerless and insignificant. After finally starting a family, all kinds of trivial problems in life came one after another. When we realize that one day death will definitely keep us away from these troubles, will we feel that death is not as scary as we imagined?
When you are no longer afraid of death, what other terrible things are there in the world? Study, work, and life will gradually make us forget to think about death. The trivial things in it push everyone forward. As we walk, we don’t even remember the reason for moving forward. Maybe there was never any reason.
Many people have said this to me, "What can I do? Life is pushing you forward like this. Sometimes you want to stop and take a rest, but everyone around you is moving forward. , How dare I stop!"
This makes even fewer people stop in their hurry. Some people think that they have "died" a long time ago, and they have become numb from working hard for life, while there are many people who always think that they are still far away from death. They think that they can wake up from bed every day and continue to live. and work; a small number of people take time to think about "death" and live and work with some motivation; only a very small number of people often think about "death". After thinking about it, they no longer escape from it and are no longer afraid of it. It gives you the courage to do what you really want to do. As Montaigne said, "Death can relieve all pain, how stupid it is to worry about death!"
Why don't we often think about "death"? Since elementary school, everyone has been pushed by various expectations. "College Entrance Examination", a single-plank bridge that will be stepped on by millions of troops, people are taught to "go to college", "do a big career", "become a high official", "make big money", "find a stable job" and "buy "Buy a car and a house", "Get married and have children", "Live a wealthy or stable life", "Retire and provide for the elderly", "Bring up grandchildren"... After completing these, where should we go? Should we just sit and wait to die?
Montaigne: "Everything you experience is asking for life. This is actually damaging life. What your life is constantly creating is death. When you are alive, you are in death, because When you are no longer alive, you are already dead."
When people understand this, will they still live and work busily and aimlessly? Doesn't anyone want to get rid of these constraints left by who knows who and do something they really want to do? Whenever someone chooses not to accept those constraints, someone will definitely come over to persuade them in various ways, and even "suppress" them mentally.
"What will you do if you don't work?", "If you don't get married and don't have children, then what are you doing in this world?", "If you don't buy a house, where will you live in the future?",...
In fact, if we came to this world simply to do these things, then everything would be simpler. But does this simplicity make sense? Who can tell what these mean? To whom does it make sense? More and more people are discovering this, so people are constantly asking questions about this, and people are constantly looking for the answer to this question. What is the answer?
Montaigne said: "No matter when your life ends, it is always intact. The purpose of life lies not in its length, but in how it is used. Some people live a long life, but barely live it. Live well while you are alive. The long time you live depends on your wishes, not on the number of years you live. But do you ever think that you will never reach the place you are going to? , which road has no exit?
Aren’t all things in the world aging with you? At the moment of your death, how many people, animals and creatures are also there? Die forever!"
Do you have the answer in your heart now? Don't you still have the courage to find or speak out loud the answer that has been hidden in your heart for a long time? If not, your heart is already strong enough not to be defeated by anything, including "death".