Philosophy contained in prose: You are unhappy because you can't stand living.
No matter how complicated and difficult the world around us is, we should protect your inner tolerance and gentleness. I hope you can meet your unknown and beautiful self. Before that, you should tolerate others and be treated gently by the world. Before that, you should treat the whole world gently.
165438+ In October, there was a heavy snow in Beijing. Ginkgo biloba is still yellow, the leaves are still green, persimmons are still hanging on the branches to warm our eyes, and the Chinese rose is covered with a white cloak made of snowflakes, suddenly changing into a stunning look. On the weekend afternoon, my girlfriend made an appointment for afternoon tea. When I got into the car facing a large snowflake, the driver waiting downstairs was talking to someone else. Listen to the tone is very uncomfortable, let his tone stiff and angry. I sat in the back seat and waited for him to hang up. I asked him to open the back window first, and then I excitedly raised my mobile phone and photographed the snow-covered street.
When I turned to ask the master to close the window, I found him looking back at me. I smiled: in the early morning, WeChat friends circle screened all kinds of snow scenes. If I don't send some, it's like I'm not in Beijing. Then, I saw him smile, start the car and drive slowly to my destination. On the way, he talked to me about the Imperial City and the Forbidden City in the snow, and his tone became gentle and pleasant, which was completely different from just now. Beijing becomes Peiping when it snows, and the Forbidden City becomes the Forbidden City when it snows. Even if the mood is extremely bad, you can pass on the beautiful scenery and happy people, so that every heart can lighten the burden, tolerance and warmth of life.
What kind of person you are, what kind of person you will meet, anxious to meet anxiety, impatient to meet hot, hypocritical to meet pretend, uncertain to meet more unreliable, gentle to meet more gentle. One day, I went to the movies with my friends and passed a tea shop. When the waiter said I needed ice and half a sugar, I was attracted by the words of my colleague next to me. The two chatted happily and forgot that we had to pay the bill with money. I don't know what I said. Anyway, the cashier smiled happily. Finally, when she turned her attention back to us again, I said the request for milk tea. After leaving with milk tea, my friend said: With you, my temper will get better. The absent-minded waiter just now was angry before I changed my clothes, but you just said it calmly. I said: first, we are in a good mood to drink a cup of milk tea, and no one can destroy it. Second, the waiter smiled very happily. We were in no hurry, and there were no customers waiting behind, so we gave her time to be happy for a while.
People often ask: Why are all the beautiful things in your eyes? Yes, even though I have entered some of the most difficult moments in my life, when I can't stand it, I still have to get through it. Hope is the last beauty in my eyes, and tolerance is my strength to get out of the night. Be tolerant of those close to you, and strangers don't need to care at all. Sometimes tolerance is affectionate, sometimes tolerance is understanding, sometimes tolerance is letting go, and sometimes tolerance is disdainful. We are surrounded by all kinds of unhappy people who complain that they are full of energy, not that they can't live, but that they can't live well. You have to ask why, and make sure that it's all someone else's business. Except yourself, the whole world owes you. The most destructive thing about negative energy is that you never know how to reflect on yourself. The reason why you are unhappy is that you are not tolerant, and the reason why you are not gentle is that you have never had true love.
Franklin said: If virtue can be chosen, please choose tolerance first. Only in today's materialistic society, virtue is being ignored and abandoned by more and more people, and even if tolerance is chosen, many people simply don't understand it and it is useless. As a result, money, fame and fortune are everywhere, laughing at poverty instead of prostitution. Selfishness and numbness are easily distorted, but hate is more enjoyable than love. For some things we don't understand, we have no right to interfere and blame, but to learn to respect people who are different from us and understand the difficulties of others. And respect is a tolerant character. Tolerance is a noble character in front of strangers. Tolerance is definitely not blindly bearing the burden of humiliation, but the compassion of life wisdom in the face of cruel reality, which inspires others and themselves. I am tolerant because I am grateful.
Sometimes I feel depressed, not necessarily the kind of sad worry, sometimes just because of the trivial life and the loneliness in the crowd. The world is noisy, everyone is in a hurry, and the smiling face seems to have become a shape. Anger has been hidden in the corner of my heart, either out of control or making my heart numb to indifference. There are always some sober souls who stick to their own direction, and there is sunshine in that sadness, so eventually you will be warmed up slowly. Life is impermanent, and our feelings should be warmer. Regardless of gains and losses, we have come and gone, and we have all suffered. Gentleness is the last decent thing to stick to. Besides smiling, I am gentle because I love.
In the vast sea of people, everyone has loneliness and hardship, joy and smile, and each has its own misfortune and happiness. Life is a necklace worn on trivial days, dazzling in the window, colorful in the hands and beautiful around the neck. Only those who know how to appreciate, cherish what they have and are good at changing will be favored by fate. Don't say you can't do it without trying. The beginning of life is good. It's not that life has changed you, but that you are willing to fall. The loss of female charm is due to their own boredom and laziness in thinking. If they love others, they just want something for nothing. If they love themselves, they will be conceited as long as others tolerate them. You have never been tolerant, and your unhappy face is numb and ugly. You simply don't understand that behind gentleness is patience and hard work, so that you can have the power to infect others and make the world a better place.
Even if the world around you is complicated and difficult, protect your inner tolerance and gentleness. I hope you can meet your unknown and beautiful self. Before that, you should tolerate others and be treated gently by the world. Before that, you should treat the world gently.
Life will never live up to those happy and beautiful lives. If you are tolerant and gentle, you won't have to calculate and compete, and you will be rewarded by your own fate.
Philosophy contained in prose: life is relaxed and infinite, and life is happy.
There is no limit to life. You can live happily and happily. Mentality represents a person's mental state. As long as you have a good attitude, you can maintain a full mood every day. If you have a good attitude, you will be very lucky. Cheer up and good luck will come naturally. Remember to have a positive attitude in everything. Once you lose him, jump out. Learn to adjust your attitude. With a good attitude, work has a direction. As long as people don't lose their way, they won't lose themselves The quality of mentality lies in the timely adjustment and cultivation at ordinary times and the cultivation of habits. People living in this world should look on the bright side, be far-sighted and open-minded, and believe that everything will be beneficial to me. There are always more ways than difficulties, so there will be no water that can't flow out, mountains that can't be moved, holes that can't be drilled, and karma that can't be built.
People who live happily must have a good attitude. A philosopher said well, since reality cannot be changed, then we have to change ourselves. Changing yourself is to adjust your mentality. How to adjust your mentality; The author believes that there are three points that are crucial. Not too much. Desire is endless. The higher the desire, the greater the contrast and the easier it is to get out of balance once it is not satisfied. Don't attach too much importance to the idea of comparison. If you keep comparing yourself with others, you will be "more angry than others." If we compare the treatment with laid-off workers, the income with peasant brothers, and the contribution with advanced figures, our mentality will be balanced and our grievances will naturally disappear. Learn to forget. Don't dwell on the past, let bygones be bygones, so that you can get rid of many troubles, feel comfortable, have a good time and live a happy life.
Learn to be quiet, immerse yourself in your heart, and slowly reduce your desire for things. Always zero yourself. Every day is a new beginning. there is no age limit. As long as your desire for things is properly reduced, you will win more chances. To say the least, it is natural to be content with being a man, ignorant of things and dissatisfied with learning. This is not only his transcendental realm of life, but also a mirror to test our mentality. We might as well take a photo often to see if our mentality has been adjusted. When you are upset, you can drink a glass of white water, play a soothing light music, close your eyes and reflect on people and things around you. You can slowly lose the idea of a new future, which is a kind of rest and a kind of calm thinking. Keep your mood and know the rules of life.
Learn self-mediation, everyone has a set of self-outlook on life, some people live happily, while others are surprisingly disappointed with life. In the final analysis, it is a matter of mentality. There will always be many sudden disasters in life, which will make people suddenly fall into a state of loss, anxiety, mania and even despair of life. It is not difficult to see that with the progress of society and fierce competition, people's various pressures have increased. If this pressure exceeds a certain load capacity, people will have extreme emotions and the consequences will be unimaginable. Personally, I think that if people can find an outlet for themselves at an appropriate stage, they will gradually eliminate such mental pressure and let you move towards a more brilliant road. So how can we reduce such negative emotions and face the world optimistically?
Learn to take care of yourself. Only by caring for yourself can we have more energy to care for others. If you have enough ability, you should try your best to help those who you can. Then you will get some happiness. Helping others and being kind to yourself is also a way to relieve stress. Only when you face life with sincerity, love and personality will your life be more exciting and competitive. There is no need to envy others, and there is no need to envy others. Many people always regard themselves as bystanders because they envy others. The more so, the more they will fall into the abyss. You have to believe that you can do it as long as you do it. Be happy with your progress, big or small. Do simple and complicated things, do simple things seriously, do serious things again and again, and strive to be the best.
Learn to adjust your mood and try to look on the bright side. Many people are anxious like ants in hot bricks when they encounter something. It is precisely because of a poor grasp of emotions that simple things are complicated and complex things are even more difficult. In fact, as long as we grasp the key of the matter, we will be able to handle every detail with ease. When you encounter something difficult, calm down and think about how to do it well. The more you think about the bright side, the more you think about it. Under no circumstances should you look down on yourself. Even if the whole world doesn't believe in you and looks down on you, you should believe in yourself, because I believe that if you like yourself, more people will like you. If you want to be yourself, you will, as long as you want to work hard to achieve it.
Be a quality person, treat and cherish the people around you, and try not to hurt the language. Even if you meet someone you don't like, try to make a detour and find a reason not to hurt yourself. This will not only make you feel bad, but also make the scene more embarrassing. Cherish everything around you now. Love life, absorb new nutrients every day and think differently every day. Learn to put yourself in others' shoes, try to find new things and satisfy the novelty and mystery of the world. Remember, keep an optimistic attitude every day. When you encounter troubles, you should learn to make yourself happy and be strong and confident. So you should keep a good attitude, look at the world with gratitude, look at the world with heart, regardless of gains and losses, and learn to find all touching things around you. Attitude determines the state. Only by maintaining a good attitude can we make ourselves happy.
The quality of mentality lies in the timely adjustment and cultivation at ordinary times and the cultivation of habits. People living in this world should look on the bright side, be far-sighted and open-minded, and believe that everything will be beneficial to me, and there will always be more ways than difficulties, so that there will be no water that cannot flow out and mountains that cannot be moved, and there will be no holes that cannot be drilled and businesses that cannot be built. Desire is endless. The higher the desire, the greater the contrast and the easier it is to get out of balance once it is not satisfied. Mentality is a person's mental state. As long as you have a good attitude, you can maintain a full mood every day. If you have a good attitude, you will be very lucky. Cheer up and good luck will come naturally. Remember to have a positive attitude in everything. Once you lose him, jump out and learn to adjust your attitude. If you have a good attitude, you will have a direction.
People who live happily must have a good attitude. On the road of life, we should learn to be kind to others and ourselves. Being kind to others can make life go further; Be kind to yourself to make life moist. No matter who you are kind to, it's actually a warm current, and love is delayed. Finally, it is applied to others, Hui Ze herself. When times are good, think about being kind to others. Self-control, showing people peace; What has been achieved shows humility; I'm happy to show my calmness. Even if you don't have such a high level, at least you can be neither arrogant nor impetuous, nor show off or exaggerate. Kindness, sometimes, is a kind gesture and a gentle attitude. Being broad-minded doesn't mean that you can pretend to be a few, but that you can pretend to be a few others. The land of spinning horses and accepting countless others must be the kindest heart in the world.
In adversity, you should know how to be kind to yourself. Since reality cannot be changed, everyone will encounter ups and downs. The long river of life, some reefs and shoals, can not be bypassed. But no matter what happens, remember that if no one cares about you in this world, you should cherish yourself and no one cares about you, so you should care about yourself. Yes, if you can always be good to yourself, life will never fail. Kindness is essentially a kind of heartache. Essence determines a person's character, and a person who is distressed by others will also be distressed by the world. To be kind to yourself is to learn to forgive and not dwell on past mistakes; Is to learn to take a step back and not to struggle with unattainable desires. How much you can forgive and how much you can refund is actually how good you are to yourself. Being kind to yourself is actually to reconcile with yourself, have a good attitude towards life and look down on the world.
Philosophy contained in prose: Your primary responsibility is to make yourself happy.
1
After reading this unremarkable report, at that moment, I was really as shocked as being hit by a bullet? These four conditions are integrated into me, but I don't feel happy!
Why can't I feel happy? With this question mark, I went to observe the people around me and found that there are so few people who have happiness. One year, I took out my greeting card and looked at it. It turns out that "I wish you happiness" is the most common sentence. This may be the collective unconsciousness of China people, so I think forever is an auspicious word.
2
However, what is the essence of happiness?
The book Revolution of the Brain by Dr. Shigeo Haruyama of Japan says that when we feel happy, it is actually the physiology that secretes an endorphin, that is, happiness is the secretion of endorphins in the body. Morphine extracted from poppy is a kind of medicine, and its magic lies in that its molecular structure simulates endorphins on the physiological basis, so that you can experience a disguised and simulated happiness. When you feel really happy, for example, when you receive a college admission notice, if you take blood to check the biochemical level in your body, your endorphin level is very high.
According to Mao Xiong Chunshan's research, the secretion of human endorphins is surprisingly consistent with Maslow's "hierarchy of needs" pyramid theory: eating can bring pleasure, and people are happy on the physiological basis; Then, in the process of realizing the needs of security, love and dignity, with the secretion of more endorphins, you can feel your happiness; The most important thing is that when you realize yourself, endorphins reach a very high level, far exceeding the happiness brought by eating.
This combination of physiology and psychology makes me feel that being able to experience happiness is a process that needs training, perception and continuous improvement, because happiness is not innate.
three
I think happiness in the world comes from firm belief first.
Often go to colleges and universities to communicate with college students. What gives me the greatest feeling is that they are facing a very important problem? The establishment of outlook on life and values is what people live for.
My psychological counseling center is often interviewed by the media. My favorite question is: "What is the most frequently consulted question?" I said that if I knew this beige sofa in the counseling room, I would definitely hear the visitors ask "Why am I alive?" I think people are animals seeking meaning, especially young people. This question has been asked countless times.
In the past, we used to instill ideas, ideals or goals into our children from an early age, hoping to take root in his heart and become the coordinates of his life. But now I find that a person's goal must be established in his own psychological structure after hard exploration, otherwise, no matter how well-intentioned and earnest we are, it is really just an external thing.
In fact, everyone has set a goal in life long ago, because it already exists in your heart: from your childhood experience, what you love, respect, yearn for and struggle for has long been rooted in your heart, but it has been influenced by many secular things and complicated external influences, and even covered up. When a person begins to pay attention to his mental health consciously, he is combing his psychological structure, and then understanding the structure and system that has achieved the most important role in his heart.
Once in a lecture at a very good university, a student handed a note under the stage and said, "Teacher Bi, I want to ask you, I am young and beautiful, and I have such a good college diploma. If I don't find a rich man to marry myself, will it waste resources? " I think it is particularly important to have this kind of friend discussion when college students are confused and unable to find their goals.
four
In addition, I think the positioning of self-image is a very important part of the source of happiness.
In the construction of college students' self-image, part of it is their "origin" (class): they suddenly gather together from various classes. Although the university is a relatively narrow and closed environment, it is also the epitome of the whole society. Therefore, how to treat one's non-selective birth class is a very important part of self-image. The other part is their studies, including learning ability, IQ and interpersonal skills. It all boils down to your own struggle.
However, there is a particularly important part, that is, external conditions? Looks
Once I gave a lecture on self-image and self-cognition in a university, and asked the students in the audience to answer: Have any of you ever felt inferior for your looks? And raised their hands in unison? Everyone feels inferior!
I didn't know how to react. I didn't expect contemporary young people to have so much pressure on their appearance.
Later, I quietly asked a girl if she had any inferiority complex about her looks, but I really couldn't find it. She is slim, with black hair like a waterfall, bright eyes and white teeth, and her skin is frozen. She is really a beauty.
She said, I have an ugly tooth.
I said, which tooth?
She said, the sixth tooth.
I said, thank you for telling me. Otherwise, I'll stand on the other side and look at you for a hundred years and I won't see that your teeth are broken.
She said, you don't know, but I know. I dare not laugh. I always sip my mouth and show only two teeth. My classmates all say how "cold" and arrogant I am. Actually, I'm just afraid that others will see the sixth tooth. When a boy pursued me, I thought, I have bad teeth, but he pursued me anyway. He must have ulterior motives, so he gave up several boys with good conditions.
five
I think that when a person can't accept himself and get along well with himself, he can't get along well with others. Because he is so critical of himself, how can he have sincere and good communication and relationship with others?
In fact, I quite appreciate a sentence in _ _ _ _ _: Accept the unchangeable part of you. We can make a list, such as class, appearance and defects, which we can't change, but what we can practice, make up and improve is what we can change.
In the face of something we can't change, everyone has different answers, and this different answer may have a profound impact on our lives. For example, if a person thinks he is ugly, he thinks he will not be happy at all. Since he is so ugly, what right does he have to be happy? One man said he was poor. Why can others be born with wealth, but he is born at the grassroots level?
Faced with all kinds of inequalities, I often tell young people that inequality is an organic part of society, and it is one of your bounden responsibilities to make it more equal.
First of all, you should abandon your illusions and accept unfairness, huge differences or birth defects. Then, for the parts that you can change, you should carefully analyze and find out your own advantages and disadvantages. If you have advantages, you must do it better. If you have shortcomings, you should make up for them. In particular, you should highlight your own advantages and show your radiant side. Because China culture is particularly easy to tell you what you can't do, for fear that you will forget your own shortcomings, and not many people will tell you what your own strengths are, so you should accept your own strengths and carry them forward.
six
There is a master in the psychological counseling center studying in the UK with a monthly salary of 654.38+0.2 million, but he describes himself as useless, which makes me very sad. I just know that whether a person accepts himself or not actually lies not in external conditions, nor in secular standards, but in measuring his own internal framework.
I usually don't leave homework for anyone after consulting, but I said that day, I will leave you an homework: before you come to see me next week, you should write your own 15 advantages.
He almost fainted and said, how can we find the advantage of 15? I can only find one or two at most. In this world, maybe only you believe that I still have advantages, my parents don't believe that I have advantages, and everyone doesn't believe that I have advantages!
I said, your boss at least believes you have an advantage, otherwise, how could he hire you with a monthly salary of 1.2 million?
He was suddenly dazed by this fact for a long time, and then said, Oh, I'll try.
So I think we should know our strengths, carry forward them and accept those things that cannot be changed. When you can be honest with yourself, you can be honest with the world? Only by letting go of your baggage can you go into battle lightly.
Feuerbach said: "Your first responsibility is to make yourself happy. If you are happy, you can also make others happy, because happy people only want to see happy people around you. "
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