Feng Feng
Jun Jian/Transcript
The wish of transforming the garage into a piano room has finally come true. Thanks to the great help of Huang Hongchang, his wife and children, I now have a quiet piano room. How grateful I am that Bodhisattva Wei Tuo arranged to send the Huang family to help me! At the same time, I thank Guanyin Bodhisattva for her blessing, which made this one-armed Mr. Huang completely safe during his help. How risky it is for him to use the chainsaw table with one arm!
The floor is nailed. I washed and dried an old carpet given to me by Mrs. K, and spread it in this piano room. I made a small bed out of some old boards, and put an old sofa and an old table in the room, which actually looked like a room, except for the piano.
That piano is about 8 to 9 years old. I bought it from a company. I'm not studying music. How could I buy a piano? Besides, I can't play the piano at all, and I can't afford it.
this incident is also a very coincidental miracle.
I have always liked music, especially classical music. When I was a child, I dreamed of studying musicology and composing music, but my family was poor and I didn't have the environment to go to college. (Editor's Note: Feng Feng often dropped out of school or transferred to another school because of fleeing in his childhood. Even so, he often advanced placement and was admitted to a university in Guangzhou at the age of fifteen. However, he dropped out of school because of war and other reasons. Since he was in his teens, he had to work on his own to earn a living. I don't even have a chance to study practical skills, let alone talk about music. Life is pressing, and it is not bad luck to find a job to support yourself and support your mother. How dare you expect to learn composition and piano? Who dares to imitate Beethoven, Bach and Chopin? Ask yourself, there is no music cell!
But I've always dreamed of owning a piano, which I've always dreamed of since I was a teenager until I became an adult. Every time I go to the auditorium of any school and see that grand piano, I envy it. I have to touch the keys, even though they are locked, and I have to touch the lid. In Canada, I rarely work in big companies, and I have no interest in those dazzling department stores. I'm simply afraid to visit the company. Every time I go, it's just to buy necessary daily necessities. No matter how busy I am, I always go around to the piano department to "admire" those pianos and touch the keys whenever I have the chance. I am so envious!
"Do you want to buy a piano, sir?" The foreigner shop assistant asked me and woke me up from my dream.
"ah!" I shook my head with a blushing smile. I know people also see that I am poor and can't afford a piano, which makes me even more embarrassed. "No, how can I afford it?"
then I left in shame. I knew that the clerk had just come to drive me away. A piano, the lowest price is three or four thousand Canadian dollars! How can I afford it? People see through me. I am so old that I like to touch the beautiful piano in the shop like a child. How embarrassing!
But I often envy a piano in my dreams. I often dream that my hands are pressed on the keys of the piano and I can't make a sound. I am so anxious that I even cry. Look at the keys again, it turned out to be a blank sheet of paper. I woke up very disappointed, and my tears were still there. I know, I have no musical talent. I wish I could stay hungry in this life. Don't dream of being Chopin again!
Without piano assistance, I still taught myself some introductory books on music composition, and it took me more than a year to write a 2-page symphony bit by bit. Needless to say, this is a graffiti work by an amateur, who thinks that he has written a symphony full of national colors in China, and that he will become China's Kacha Dorian. In fact, there are many mistakes and nothing like it.
I remember that year, I got up the courage and took this symphony to visit Mr. Davis, the conductor of Vancouver Symphony Orchestra at night. I was full of hope that he would give me a chance to play, or at least give me some advice. Unexpectedly, the great conductor only opened the first page and read two lines, then he laughed and satirized me.
"what's this?" His words, still in my ears, stung my heart: "Is it a pinyin game?"
"It's music". I remember I blushed and replied in a panic: "I made a symphony by myself!"
"You have no genius at all!" Mr. Davis said seriously, "You are hopeless! You are not the material for composing music at all! Take my advice, son, and give up your ambitious dreams! Go home and do something else! I think you have absolutely no musical talent! "
I know there is no musical genius, just as I know there is no literary genius. But I'm not convinced. I want to shape myself. I taught myself to compose music for several years, and within a few minutes, I fell from the clouds and fell miserably.
I still remember that night, I braved the snowstorm and walked home through the ice and snow with sad tears. After walking many miles, I stepped over the magnificent bridge. Cars sped in groups on the driveway, and the dirty snow splashed on me. The neon lights in downtown Vancouver sparkled, and the symphony orchestra played Beethoven's Symphony of Destiny in the palace-like Queen's Theater. Under the bridge, there was dark sea water, reflecting lights and floating ice everywhere. At the other end of the bridge, there are thousands of lights. I cried all the way, and I almost threw myself into the cold water under the bridge. However, my mother is still waiting for me to go home in the house where we live. How can I commit suicide because of failure? I must go home! I woke up from my dream. I don't dream of genius anymore! I must take caring for my mother as my only job!
but how painful my heart is! I want to tear up my music and throw it under the bridge, but I can't bear it. I cried all the way in the heavy snow and wanted to go home. I know I'll never be a composer. Half a century ago, Kacha Dorian of Armenia was too poor to take the train and walk to Moscow in the heavy snow. This rural youth, who can't read or read the staff, dreamed of entering the Moscow Conservatory of Music to study composition. He actually got what he wanted, and later became a great composer of national music, and wrote many symphonies of Armenian national style, including the Slave Symphony, which brought Armenian national music to the world. A song, Sabre Dance, shocked the music world. How I wish I could be like him! I dream of introducing China folk music to the world, but I have no talent! I failed!
That painful memory still comes to my mind from time to time. I have long given up my dream of composing music. However, I still dream of a piano.
why do I still want a piano? Because, I still love music, I know I am not a musical genius, and I have narrowed my dream. I only hope to make some artistic lyric songs of Buddhism. I only hope to compare music with the sublime songs like Ode to Our Lady or Hallelujah of American Catholicism, and at least I have to write some decent lyric songs of Buddhism! I feel that the Buddhist Brahma is really beautiful, but Buddhism lacks artistic lyric songs, and people who study music simply don't bother to make it. Few people in the Buddhist circle pay attention to this issue. I think I should afford a share of this kind of work!
I deeply feel that although I only write simple songs, I also need a piano. Yes, I dare not dream of being the second Kacha Dorian. I only dream of writing some lyric songs of Buddhist art. I need a piano! However, how can I afford to buy a piano for four or five thousand yuan?
I prayed for avalokitesvara, and I know whether such a prayer is improper. I have never prayed for a bodhisattva for material desires before.
One day, I went shopping in a famous big company. I said I was embarrassed to go to the piano department again, but I walked into that corner unconsciously, envied the pianos on display again, and inevitably touched the keys again.
"What kind of piano does Mr. Wang want?" A gentleman-type clerk in his well-dressed fifties came to me and asked me politely, if I didn't see the name of the staff brand on his lapel, I would really misunderstand whether he was an English rich gentleman who came here for vacation.
"I can't afford it!" Embarrassed, I replied, "I just came to see!" "
"I have a piano that you can afford," he said. "It's old, about 8 years old. I can sell it to you for 25 yuan. Would you like to have a look?"
"ah! You can buy a piano for 25 yuan? " I was very surprised: "Where is it? Let me have a look! "
"It's in the corner over there," he showed me. "This was when a lady came to buy us a new piano yesterday, and she gave us her old piano at a discount. Our piano delivery man just moved it back this morning."
That piano looks like an antique. It's stupid and heavy, and its style is very clumsy. The keys are so old that they turn smoky yellow. No wonder he is willing to sell it to me at a low price.
"Give it a try," he said. "It's too old, but the sound is very good."
"I can't play."
"I'll play it for you." He sat down and played a piece of music. Sure enough, it sounded good, and it sounded more charming than the new piano.
"how's it going?" He asked me, "Do you like it?"
"Yes, but ..."
"I'll ask someone to replace all the piano discs for you," he said. "I'll also ask someone to deliver them to your home, and I'll ask Andhadhun to tune them for you. Everything is included in the price. What do you think? I'm giving you special treatment, you know? The charge for Andhadhun is 1 yuan, and the material fee for changing keys is 3 yuan, and the handling fee is 5 yuan. We only charge you 25 yuan now, which is a loss, which is equivalent to giving it to you. "
"Why are you doing this?"
"We have already made money selling the new piano to her," he said with a smile. "This old piano, sitting here, takes up too much space and doesn't look good. We'll get rid of it and sell it to you at a cheaper price. It's better to go to the garbage dump in Bidiu. As soon as I saw you come in, I knew that you wanted to buy a piano very much, but you were in trouble. Moreover, you obviously have some genius qualities. Maybe you will become a musician one day, so I decided to help you, or I can say that I have a little power to help you! "
"ah!" I was overjoyed and said excitedly, "Thank you! I buy, I buy! "
whether what he said is true or not, it's not bad to buy a piano for 25 yuan, put on a new keyboard, and package tuning and handling. So I bought this ancient piano, and the company kept its promise, replaced it with a brand-new keyboard, repaired the interior, and asked someone to carry it and adjust the tone.
Since then, I have owned a piano. Although it is an antique, its color is dark and ugly, but its sound is beautiful. The clerk of the company didn't lie to me. Indeed, the tone of this old piano is better than that of the new one. The first time I touched the piano key to play a song, I played Chopin's Parting Song halfway, but I couldn't stop crying!
Chopin wrote this mournful short song at the age of 17, which contains many feelings! I remember at the Kaohsiung Railway Station at midnight, I was alone, waiting for the midnight express to return to Taipei, and only a few passengers were taking a nap in the waiting room. Chopin's "Parting Song" was playing at the station, and there was no one on the platform. I was suddenly touched by the mournful music and couldn't help crying!
what happened many years ago is still in my mind, and I have been wandering around the world for many years! Only with my mother! Now I have a piano. My childhood dream has come true, but how clumsy I am that I can't play the works of Chopin, a seventeen-year-old boy. This is the difference between genius and non-genius! I remember once upon a time, when my first novel, Weixi, came out, a 17-year-old boy wrote to me from Taichung. He said, "I don't think you are a genius, you are definitely not!" (Note of the entrant: In fact, the million-word "Weixi" was unexpectedly popular after its publication. All kinds of praise, sound shock everywhere. For this reason, Feng Feng won the first "National Top Ten Outstanding Youth Award" organized by the Youth Chamber of Commerce, and the Philippine China Daily selected Wei Xi as the best novel in 1963. )
The teenager who will become a famous writer and dancer in the future is really right. I have no genius. I have been rated as no genius everywhere, which is undeniable. However, do people have to be talented to be qualified to struggle? I have no genius, and I still want to write. Maybe I will never be a composer. At least, I have to write some Buddhist art songs! The dream of genius, I dare not do it in this life, but the song of faith still lingers in my heart and will never be released!
years of rough blood and tears, where can I complain? I packed up my broken feelings and re-attached myself to literature and music. I am determined to write Buddhist music!
Of course, writing Buddhist literature is the first priority, and composition can only be put in the second place. I can only study the piano and the harmony and counterpoint necessary for composition in my spare time. Now that I have a piano, it is easier to learn composition.
after several years of self-study, I can finally play some simple songs in Chopin's works. Gradually, I can make some impromptu music myself. I gave up the high ambition of symphony, and I returned to simple and easy music. I am no longer ambitious.
At that time, I was working on "Empty Clouds", and I spent nearly five years on this novel, so that I never had time to seriously start my Buddhist music composition.
The piano room has been built, but the master's piano is still in the dark corner on the other side of the basement, and it has not been moved into the piano room. Naturally, I hope to move it in. I can't sit in the woodpile and play the piano forever!
what a big problem! Because the new floor of the piano room is two feet higher than the ground on the other side of the basement. This piano weighs over 8 pounds! How can I move it to the floor of the piano room? Even if I can find a few big men, I still can't move this behemoth! Mr. and Mrs. Huang said they would help me, but how could I have the heart to ask a one-armed man, a woman and a child to help me with such heavy work? I'm afraid that with the efforts of the four of us, it's just a dragonfly shaking the column. If I hurt their family, how can I live up to them? I must not let them move. I must find a way myself.
The piano has four small semi-rusted wheels, which can be pushed on the flat ground, but how can I push it onto a foot-high floor?
that night, I found some wrenches in the basement and put them between the floor of the piano room and the basement lowland to make a springboard. I tried to push the piano onto the springboard and then push it into the piano room.
the theory is right, but it doesn't work in practice. I can't push the piano anyway, let alone on the springboard, even on the flat ground. More than 8 pounds of tall and huge master piano can be pushed on the springboard. On the slope with an elevation of 3 degrees, more than 8 pounds will increase the gravity due to inclination, or will it be two to three times more? I can't calculate the mechanical equation, but I can imagine that this is a minimum gravity of one or two thousand pounds. How can I move it back?
I tried again and again, and tried my best to push the piano onto the springboard within two hours, no matter how hard I tried. I stood by the door, panting and tired, looking helplessly at the huge and heavy piano. It was late at night, and I was still worried about the piano.
"Wei Tuo Bodhisattva!" I was discouraged and prayed silently, "Bodhisattva Wei Tuo! Pray for you, give me some divine power, and let my disciples push the piano onto the springboard and into the piano room!