According to the "Ba Jin Chronicle", when Ba Jin came to Shanghai to study in 1923, he published three short poems in "Women's Magazine". So I went to the Shanghai Library to check it out, and finally found this "Women's Magazine" Volume 9, No. 10, published by the Shanghai Commercial Press in October 1923. I carefully opened the slightly yellowed pages, and sure enough, in the poetry section at the back, I saw three poems signed by "Pei Gan" (Ba Jin's pen name): "Life", "Loneliness" and "Dark Night Boating". These three poems are very short, with only 11 lines in total, but they are a true portrayal of the thoughts and feelings of the 20-year-old Ba Jin when he first left his hometown of Chengdu, where he had lived for 19 years. He wrote in the poem:
Things that have not yet bloomed are in bud;
Things that are about to bloom are in bloom;
Things that have already bloomed are withered. Broken;
The flower passed her life quietly.
——"Life"
A pricked plum blossom died in the pot.
Her life was so lonely!
——"Loneliness"
Ba Jin was born in a large feudal family in the closed and backward Chengdu. What he heard and witnessed from an early age was the darkness of society, the corruption of politics, and the people in the big family. Fighting against each other, intrigues, feudal ethics and morals harm people. All this created a huge pressure, making the young Ba Jin feel depressed, lonely, and sad. "Life" is a description of his feelings. And "a pricked plum blossom died in the pot..." is reminiscent of the tragic experience of "Plum" in "Home", reflecting Ba Jin's deep sympathy for countless young men and women who are persecuted by feudal ethics. And disgust, accusation and resistance to feudal autocracy. He is unwilling to be lonely. He longs to break out of the darkness and leave this big family, which he calls "the authoritarian kingdom of darkness", to explore the truth and run towards the light. In May 1923, he and his third brother Yao Lin decided to leave Chengdu and go to Shanghai to study. "An ideal was waving to me in front, and my eyes were bright." "I saw a red light shining in the distance. I didn't know where the light was, but it pulled my heart, as if someone was guiding the way ahead." When the scenery of his hometown disappeared from sight, he spent a long time on the boat looking far into the distance, feeling emotional about the scene, and conceived the poem "Sail in the Dark":
It is dusk
Here In the vast river,
Where does our boat go?
The red light is far away,
Please come closer!
In this poem, Ba Jin takes the "distant red light" as a symbol of light and future, and as a symbol of life's navigation beacon. As he later said in the preface to "The Torrent": "I am still young, I still have to live, and I still have to conquer life. I know that the torrent of life will not stop, let's see where it takes me! "This poem just shows his positive attitude towards life.
After Ba Jin came to Shanghai, he and his third brother Yao Lin were admitted to Nanyang Middle School. When these three poems were published, he was in the second grade of Nanyang Middle School. Nanyang Middle School is a well-known private school in Shanghai. The school is located on the outskirts of the city on the banks of Rihui Harbor. It has a beautiful campus, excellent education, and complete facilities. It has teaching buildings, dormitories, physical and chemical laboratories, and a library famous in Shanghai for its rich collection of books. The management of students is relatively loose, and students are encouraged to be autonomous and self-reliant. Entering such an environment gave Ba Jin, who was far away from his hometown, a stable place to stay and study. On the one hand, he worked hard to learn foreign languages ??and read many original English works such as Dickens's "A Tale of Two Cities" and "Olevi Kuster". On the other hand, he continued to engage in literary creation, so at this time he compiled and published the work he had hatched when he came to Shanghai. The three short poems mentioned above.