Full-mark composition with annotations:
Beautiful Butterfly, Life is not over
Original text and annotations of full-mark composition with annotations:
1. Beautiful Butterfly
1. Comments: The central word is beauty, the beauty of life. Grasping the central word captures the theme of the article; Inscription and ending, echo from beginning to end, profoundly point out the theme of the article.
2. The original
Beautiful Butterfly
Life is short, but the beauty of life is eternal.
-Inscription
As the shower gradually subsided, I went out of the stuffy room to get some air. My eyes suddenly flashed, ah! A colorful butterfly! Blue skirt, white ribbon, butterflies flying like fairies. Not far away, it is such a gorgeous flower that presents a different kind of beauty in the washing of rain. Butterflies fluttered among the flowers, disturbing my sight. Suddenly it flew again and landed on the trunk of a big tree beside me. Is it showing off its beauty to me? I stopped to watch.
"poof!" Butterfly was hit by a drop of rain beads and fell into the puddle under the tree. I froze, I didn't know whether to hold it, and my weak wings flapped feebly in the water. I suddenly found that my breathing was shortness of breath. Gradually, gradually, a miracle appeared. It climbed to a small flower in the puddle bit by bit, erected its wet wings and trembled slightly in the wind.
I am filled with joy. The tenacious life finally overcame the bad luck. Suddenly a breeze blew and countless raindrops fell on the tree. Once again, the butterfly was unfortunately hit and fell miserably. My heart aches. There are shallow ripples on the water, and this little life is still struggling, and it is still alive! I seem to feel the throb of a powerful life! Hurriedly carefully picked it up. The trembling wings opened and closed slightly, and my heart fell with them. Weak butterfly, can you survive?
another gust of wind blew, and it cleared up, and a rainbow hung in the sky. That brave butterfly tried several times, and finally jumped out of my hand and flew to Ran Ran ... < P > I stood quietly and watched it. Respectable butterfly, for beauty, breaks the shackles of silk cocoon, for beauty, overcomes the hardships of wind and rain, isn't it explaining to me the eternal beauty of life?
2. Life is not over?
1. comments:? The author selected three representative figures and their touching stories-writers and scientists; There are China and foreign countries; There are famous ones and ordinary ones-from which I sum up my own point of view: "There is no distinction between high and low life, and they play an immortal legend in their own different ways", and at the same time take care of the topic. What is commendable is not only the author's proper selection of materials, but also his mastery of materials, such as exact time and digital quotations, which shows that the author has made solid efforts in his usual accumulation.
2. Original text
Life is not over
A great soul stopped thinking in a new village apartment in Shanghai mainland and closed his eyes forever. However, after more than 7 years, his voice and smile still appear in front of people, and people are bathed in the brilliance of his thoughts all the time, and they will never feel his existence.
He fought all his life, taking a pen as a gun and tirelessly challenging the old forces. He is willing to be a willing ox, and always cares for young people selflessly. People are often horrified when reading his works, because their own shadows are often found in the characters in the works. It questions people's conscience like a whip, "as if to squeeze out the little things hidden under the fur robe", which makes people ashamed and urges them to turn over a new leaf.
The poet praised him for "some people are dead, but he is still alive"; In the hearts of the broad masses of people, he represents the national soul! He is Lu Xun.
He is a billionaire and an outstanding inventor. He devoted his whole life to the cause of human science, and obtained 255 kinds of patents alone, and left a will behind him, dedicating all his property to the cause of science to reward future generations.
Therefore, every year on December 1th, the day of the great man's death, a simple and grand award ceremony will be held in Stockholm, the capital of Sweden, to reward people who have made great achievements in human physics, chemistry, medicine, literature and peace in the world in the past year. The amount of prize money is very generous. He is Nobel.
He is an ordinary little boy, and people have long forgotten his name. At the age of twelve, he is unfortunately terminally ill and will soon die. However, on his deathbed, he proposed to donate his cornea to patients who needed it. "So I can still see you all the time, mom," he persuaded his mother. Mother agreed to his request with tears. The little boy left peacefully, but a lucky man was able to see the light again.
there is no distinction between high and low in life. They are performing immortal legends in their own different ways.