According to your description, whenever the pressure approaches, you will feel fear, loneliness or depression, which may be a slight anxiety or an excessive pursuit of perfection.
I suggest that if you have time, you can read Harvard University: Happiness Course (/special/positivepsychology/), which is opened by Netease or Sina. Should be helpful.
Besides, no matter when you live, philosophy will help. If you want to get started, you can watch Sophie's World.
Finally, I hope I can help your troubles and wish you happiness!