Not long ago, I read Tang Ji written by Su Shi for his friend Zhang Zhifu, which actually involved this aspect. Su Shi said: "If you are in the world, there will be no thoughts in the world." It happens when it happens, and I won't think about it. If you don't think about it, you won't arrive; It's vulgar to think about it, but ignorant all your life. "He also said," Words come from my heart and rush to my mouth. If you spit, you will go against others. If you do this, you will be against others. I thought I'd rather fight someone else, so I threw it up. "This is really a temperament middleman said, spontaneous, without scruple. It seems that Su Shi is also a spiritual school, and he doesn't agree with the truth that he always has to weigh repeatedly and think twice before acting. Readers should be reminded that a friend of Zhang Zhifu named his guild hall "Si", while Su Shi was entrusted to make fun of his friend. The meaning of laughing and teasing is obvious, so the author talks nonsense and the readers can't take it seriously.
On closer inspection, Ji Kang learned a heavy lesson in Wei and Jin Dynasties. He lives in an era of social unrest, and everyone is silent about right and wrong. His good friend Ruan Ji has to control himself and keep his mouth shut about current events. Ji Kang also wants to learn from Ruan Ji's introversion, but he is still "just jealous of evil, but he is outspoken and angry when something happens." He ran into the Red Bell Club in the eyes of General Si Mazhao with words, and finally lost his life. The death of a celebrity is already embarrassing, and he also brought his own piano music "Guangling San", and the beautiful melody has since become a swan song, which is even more embarrassing.
If you criticize, you should pay attention to art. If you compliment, can you go beyond the line and indulge a little? Otherwise. Blinking your beard can also make people look askance. Han Yu was accused because he couldn't stand the demands of others and was dragged to wash the white clothes of the dead. Eight hundred years later, when talking about Han Yu, Gu still insisted: "Korean official documents have declined for eight generations. If you write in the original way, the original destruction, the theory of contending for ministers, the Pinghuai West Monument, and the biography of Zhang Zhongcheng, and refuse all the inscriptions, it is indeed the modern times of Taishan Beidou; I still dare not promise today. " "I still can't promise" is on the floor. Who dares to question the master's remarks? It's really a reputation, and slander follows. A generation of great scholars who were originally "the decline of eight generations of literature" should be promoted to a great cultural man with lofty ideals, but now they have been severely criticized by Gu.
Wei Xiangshu, a celebrity in Kangxi period in the early Qing Dynasty, had the same experience. Wei Guan worships the ministers of punishments, with high status and good articles. As a result, the people looking for the inscription were in an endless stream, and the Wei family was exhausted and miserable. In a letter to a friend, he complained: "If you set up an epitaph for people and don't fill in the deeds, you won't want to ask for it;" If you fill in the story again, you won't believe it. I can't describe it, so I have to copy the vocabulary and copy the engravings of many families to cope with it ... I would like to do something good in the world and be a good person, and don't let the author of the inscription do anything for me. " In the face of the demands of family members, there is no room for manoeuvre in catching the author, and only good words can be said blindly; When you can't write it, you should look through ancient books and find something that can satisfy the aspirant. Unwilling and helpless, Wei Xiangshu implored grave sweepers who did not forget to leave their names to accumulate virtue and do good deeds while they were alive, so that epitaph writers would not have to fabricate those false deeds without conscience.
Derogation, flattery, crossing the line and going too far are all "nonsense" as the saying goes. Lang lang gan Kun, fair and square, how can anyone talk nonsense to get the upper hand? Speaking is a lifelong learning process. Returning to Confucius and practicing the golden mean is undoubtedly the right step. The golden mean is also called neutralization. Emotions and sorrows, emotions in the middle, there will be expression requirements, "hair in the festival"-speaking realistically and in line with the rules, is the correct expression. Of course, the doctrine of the mean is not "homesickness" and has nothing to do with it. The so-called "one mind and two tasks" of the ancients in China is by no means that they have no personal position, please all sides, and are so-so, and they are passive between praise and criticism. The most valuable thing about the doctrine of the mean is to uphold rationality, choose good and follow, do not go to extremes, and speak frankly.
It's really not easy to maintain a good proper limit. For example, don't deny it easily when you speak frankly, but considering the discretion, you must tell the truth strategically and rationally. As for touching the dragon to exhort Queen Zhao and Zhuge Liang to fight with Confucianism, their speeches are full of wisdom and alertness, and they have raised their speeches to the height of art. I am afraid it will take a lifetime of efforts to reach this level.