Eighteen years old is a blooming age, and it is also a period of confusion for many people. Not being able to see the future, not being taken seriously, having low self-esteem and feeling powerless are the most overwhelming things. So am I.
Because my academic performance was not good, I chose calligraphy, which I was pretty good at, as my art major. The eight months I went to the training camp brought about earth-shaking changes in me. When I first started training, I rushed to the battlefield that belonged to me with full enthusiasm and passion for struggle. However, the concept of not working hard for a long time made me relax very quickly, and I was as confused as in school day by day. Later, I made a lot of new friends and life became more exciting day by day. Oh, I mean after school, not my professional courses. I have grown a lot in these fiery days.
Our training institution has students from various cities in Shandong Province. There is a girl from Qingdao. I had the best relationship with her at the beginning. But until one day she told me that she liked the male teacher in the premium class who had been married for thirteen days, I thought she was joking. After all, the teacher was already married, so I didn't care. It wasn't until I was playing games on her mobile phone that I discovered that the male teacher had sent her a message calling her "darling." I felt something suddenly changed.
I can’t deny that that girl is very beautiful. If I were a man, I would also be attracted to her. You know that male teacher calls a girl little baby, and calls his wife big baby. It really made me feel like I was watching some nonsensical Mary Sue story. It was incredible. Later, the two of them were caught by classmates doing some inappropriate things for children in the girls' dormitory, and this unsightly thing was exposed. I think girls would find this disgusting, but the boys in our institution seemed to have discovered a new world and went to play with that girl every day. But later I heard that the girl slept with several boys and I was a little sad.
Eighteen years old, such a good age, it really feels worthless to have ruined my reputation, ruined my studies and friendships because of a single thought. Later, the male teacher felt that this incident was affecting his career, and he tried his best to stop it, but the bad news spread thousands of miles. He came to talk to me one day and said, I am a teacher, so I teach you calligraphy seriously, and I am also a man. If a beautiful girl strips off completely in front of me, I cannot do anything. He also said that every man is like this.
I am not an innocent female student. I also like some bad boys. Their humor and gentleness make me unable to extricate myself. I know I can't afford it, I will always be tempted and get hurt, but I'm just cheap and willing. Money can't buy me, but it's hard to buy me.
It is actually very easy for girls to like a boy, especially a scumbag. I wonder if this is a theorem. The more innocent girls are, the more likely they will meet scumbag men, while those so-called scumbag girls will meet people who are sincere to them. My eighteen-year-old life began to change when I met N.
N is that kind of high-end scumbag. He treats me very well. He is so good that I thought we were in love. He is so good that I am willing to do anything for him, including my first time. he. He's such a scumbag. He's on the phone and chatting with other girls when he's having dinner with me, renting a room, or practicing calligraphy together. I would question and get angry at first, but he said, "You are not my girlfriend, why should you care about me?" It really left me speechless. Yes, I'm not, so I'm not qualified. That feeling of powerlessness made me know that I already liked him. I knew that even if he had a girlfriend, I would not leave him. After all, I became the kind of person I hate most because of him. When he said he felt sorry for me and didn't want me to work part-time, I resigned. When he said he missed me, I went to him. When he said he didn't eat well, I made him cookies. When he said he would come to see me during the summer vacation, I said wait for him and keep waiting. Disappointed again and again and cried again and again, letting me know that I am humble and letting me know that I am wrong. But I can't change it.
When I was eighteen years old, I had many firsts and also lost many firsts. But I am still willing to insist that I have no regrets.
But I hope you don't. Eighteen years old is too precious. You have just escaped from childhood and are heading into the adult world ignorantly. I hope that you will take the right path, that you will not regret it, and that you will smile when you think about it.
I wish every girl who has a happy life.