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Away from my parents and the prosperity of the city, the life of rural collective households jumping the queue is hard and monotonous, but I have also matured and grown up in this land and got a different kind of exercise.
1September 1974, I was selected as a student of workers, peasants and soldiers to study in Jilin Forestry School. Excellent grades in school, actively participate in various school activities, and break the school record of women's 60-meter dash in the annual school sports meeting. I was a monitor in my second year at school, and was named "three good students" in Jilin Forestry School at the end of the year. At that time, I was full of vigor and vitality.
1September, 975, my sister wrote to me from Tianjin, worried that my family would be worried because I was far away in the northeast after graduation. I hope to find someone in Tianjin.
In the letter, my sister said that there was a young man named Marco Lin who used to work with his brother-in-law, and now he works on a drilling ship, several months older than me. He is a very nice young man, honest and kind, willing to learn, love to delve into business, teach himself business in his spare time, operate gas logging independently for several years, and teach himself English. At present, he can speak fluent English and write simply. Sister said that we can write to communicate first.
I am well aware of my family's concern for me, and I want to leave the Northeast when I have the chance, because I really can't stand the cold in winter in the Northeast.
At that time, changing careers through marriage was the only shortcut for female educated youth to solve their personal lifestyle.
1September 1976, I graduated from forestry school and was assigned to work in Dashitou Forestry Bureau of Jilin Province.
In February, I received Marco Lin's first letter and saw his beautiful handwriting. In a few words, he is polite and contented, just right, and I feel good about him.
It's the Spring Festival of 1977 in a blink of an eye. I used the Spring Festival holiday to visit relatives in Tanggu, Tianjin.
Because we have written several letters, we are no strangers. When our eyes meet, there is no words or actions, but there is a feeling of "holding hands and meeting for life".
1977 Spring Festival is an unforgettable Spring Festival for Marco Lin and me. In just half a month, we got to know each other and rippled along the coast of Bohai Bay. Every day, we walk on the Haihe River Bridge until dusk, leaving our footprints everywhere on the uncultivated saline-alkali land of the offshore oil exploration headquarters, our laughter and songs, the sweet piano played by Marco Lin and our yearning for a better life in the future.
We are all curious about each other's work. Marco Lin's "Bohai II" drilling ship is exploring for oil at sea, which is very challenging and difficult. A cycle of offshore work is more than 20 days, sometimes even one month. Apart from the sea, even ships rarely pass by. I work in the Forestry Bureau, where there are trees, mountains and winding paths. There are no roads and no people in the forest, and the work of forestry workers is hard and monotonous. Therefore, our correspondence made us realize the sweetness and happiness of love, just as Marco Lin wrote in his letter: "My wine can't make me drunk, but your letter can't make me drunk. I said my Bohai Bay, and you said your big forest, only our love flower can brew the sweetness we want. "
The leaders of Forestry Bureau learned that my lover was in Tianjin, so in September of 1977, they asked me to go to Tianjin and Beijing on business, just in time for Fan Linhai to rest in shifts on land, and we met again seven months later.
In just 8 days, we cherish every minute together, every minute is as happy as a holiday, and parting is always inevitable. Let's meet, see you in Zhanjiang, Guangdong during the Spring Festival of' 78!
1978 65438+ 10, I went back to Shanghai with my relatives. It happened that Marco Lin's father was on a business trip and passed through Shanghai after attending the meeting, so I went back to Zhanjiang with Marco Lin's father.
Marco Lin's father warned me that we should treat Marco Lin's current work correctly and focus on the future. Young people should exercise and test themselves in stormy waves and say, "Curie, you are party member. You should support Marco Lin's work and don't hinder him. The development of the motherland's oil industry has greatly promoted the development of the national economy. "
I know the expectations of the older generation of revolutionaries for the next generation, and I know the sincerity of the revolutionary old people who came from the war years to the revolutionary cause.
From then on, I seldom mentioned to Marco Lin the idea of changing jobs to work on the land at the right time.
1978 During the Spring Festival, the two of us enjoyed the scenery of the South China in Zhanjiang. Every day, we are in a warm little family, our mood is as happy as flowers, and there is beautiful Zhanjiang city. It's clean and comfortable here, and birds and flowers are everywhere.
When we meet, we always feel that time is short. A month and a half later, we each returned to work.
Our love is developing healthily and maturing day by day. With the consent of both parents, I came to Tanggu, Tianjin from Jilin on June 1978+00, and went through the marriage registration with Marco Lin in Tanggu District People's Government.
Due to the regulations of the state at that time, the three municipalities directly under the Central Government, namely Beijing, Shanghai and Tianjin, did not accept agricultural and forestry port workers. This means that there are still some obstacles to transfer to Marco Lin. In desperation, I can only transfer from Dashitou Forestry Bureau to Zhanjiang Construction Committee.
1May, 1979, Marco Lin's drilling ship "Bohai II" was overhauled, and they could work on land for two months. During their rest, I asked for leave and went to Tanggu, Tianjin. In July, the hospital checked that I was pregnant. The news made us very happy. We are so happy that tears will overflow, waiting for the birth of the baby, waiting for our reunion, and everything is in a beautiful waiting. ...
Home leave and sick leave have expired one after another, so I went back to Zhanjiang alone and everything went as usual. The weather is getting colder and colder, even in the picturesque south of China.
1979165438+1In the early morning of October 25th, the "Bohai II" drilling ship working in Marco Lin was in distress during drilling, shifting and towing operations. In the rescue for more than four hours, all the employees on board, regardless of their own lives and deaths, finally failed to withstand the wind and waves, and 72 employees were killed.
The bad news came as a bolt from the blue. I don't believe what happened in front of me, and my heart is broken.
Dear husband, didn't we agree that in another month, you will go home with your relatives? Didn't we agree to watch the baby be born together and be the happiest parents in the world? Didn't we swear from the day we got married that you would hold my hand and take good care of me and never part? Didn't you say you would hold me in your hand every day and love me? Why is this the result? ......
The baby in my arms has been crawling in my stomach for almost six months, desperately moving, moving, moving, kicking, kicking ... does he know that he will lose his father he has never met forever?
The biggest sadness in the world is losing the people I love, but I lost them. Incredibly, in peacetime, it pains me to watch a posthumous child be born. ...
I know that in a country, there will be many people, and many sacrifices will bring peace, prosperity and adequate food and clothing. Must it be him or my dear husband Marco Lin? My husband, who has only been married for a year, and the father of the child in my belly. ...
At the memorial service, two big men supported me, which made me unable to struggle. I had to pass by in a hurry, before I could see his face clearly, before I could call my dear husband again, before I could say a word, before I could touch my already cold body. Your 26-year-old life came to an abrupt end and turned into a wisp of smoke. ...
At the memorial service, Marco Lin's father wore a military uniform, a national emblem on his head and his fingers together, and paid a high tribute to his beloved son in the most noble way. A revolutionary soldier who liberated new China was wounded in the war years and gave his beloved son in the peacetime, leaving people with sad and heavy pictures.
After the drilling ship is in distress, they can choose to abandon the ship and escape. At that time, they were thinking about state property, and the only choice for the whole crew was: people were on board and vowed to live and die with state property.
I have kept most of Marco Lin's letters since we started correspondence from 1976 to 12. Although the writing paper has turned yellow and the handwriting has faded, I still cherish it as much as I cherish it. Marco Lin wrote in the letter that NO4 wrote to me in March 1977: "I demand high standards from myself. If I have a thousand pounds of strength, I can't leave a pound of strength. In this way, when the interests of the party and the people require me to sacrifice my precious life, I, Marco Lin, will never retreat half a step, fearing death and be a shameful deserter! "
The life and love I long for, I really just tried it, and how I hope to have it forever. But I know better: deserters on the battlefield are shameful scum.
"My dear, I want to tell you two things. You see, I'm relieved of Li Ju. Remember, first, if anything happens to me, as long as you really love me, you must turn grief into strength, don't be too sad, and work hard. At the same time, I allow you to have another love. Second, if you are a deserter and a git, my love will take a 180 degree turn. Li Ju, you are a smart girl and a affectionate woman. Don't cry when you see this, you will understand later. "
This is a letter that Marco Lin wrote to me on March 1977 10. From1979165438+1October 25th, it has been two years and eight months since he died heroically for the offshore oil industry.
Yan Xuejun, a survivor of Bohai II, said many times in recent years that Marco Lin was very brave in emergency rescue. As soon as there was danger, he rushed to the front and was almost swept away by the huge waves. Marco Lin is worthy of the Party's teaching, his parents' hope for him, and his simple, honest and noble soul. He didn't embarrass his parents.
In his only 26 years of life, Marco Lin's time has become condensed and refined, because his limited life is worth living for hundreds of years for ordinary people.
He learned to play the violin during his service in the army. After learning calligraphy, I regard one day as a few days to learn business and English. It is impossible to practice the violin for two hours every night (unfortunately, the violin sank with him in Bohai Bay).
The unfortunate death of Marco Lin has brought lifelong changes to our mother and son. From then on, in my life, no one will love me like Marco Lin. My son will never be accompanied by his father's love again in his life. Such bitterness between people, such sadness and helplessness, our mother and son have experienced it, have been forced to experience it, and will always experience it ... Write here, turbid tears flow from my eyes, slip through my eyes, and are printed on paper like filar silk water drops, melting in my memory. ...
Recall my last parting with Marco Lin. 1July, 979, Beijing Yongningmen Station, the train bound for Guangdong, I burst into tears. Outside the train, Marco Lin looked at his newly pregnant wife and went to work alone in Zhanjiang, Guangdong, but he wanted to stay in Tanggu and leave the last strength for his beloved motherland. At the moment the train started, Marco Lin ran after the train and then ran. I cried and cried ... Lin Fan ran faster and faster, and ran faster and faster. He has 10 million regrets, and his pregnant wife left him. I lay in front of the window, my eyes blurred, and then blurred until I could not see. At that moment, it became a memory and regret of my life. I let go for a few minutes, but I couldn't call my relatives back. Marco Lin waved and pulled up his sleeves to wipe his tears. Since then, Marco Lin has stayed in heaven forever. ...
This is twenty-three years.
In the cold winter of June 5438+February 2002, our mother and son went north to Tanggu, Tianjin. In a dilapidated warehouse of Offshore Oil Bohai Company, the ashes of dozens of victims of Bohai II were placed in different compartments. At the bottom, we found Marco Lin's urn. Twenty-three years later, we met in a small box After 23 years of dust, the 23-year-old son carefully wiped it with a small towel. Watching my son get in close contact with his biological father for the first time, my heart was completely torn apart, and a loud wail shook the world. Crying in a dark warehouse is even more sad and cold. ......
Sitting on the plane back to Shanghai, my son held his father's urn tightly to his chest and refused to let go for a moment. I stroked my son's hand and kept shouting: Is this a reunion of our family of three? Is this a reunion of our family of three?
Afterwards, I once asked my son if you were afraid when you first held the urn on your chest. He said, no, not at all. It turns out that kinship and blood relationship are so wonderful.
This is related to the poem After the Storm written by the poet Shu Ting in August 1980 to commemorate 72 comrades-in-arms killed in Bohai No.2 drilling platform.
The poem reads: Seventy-two sons made my father miserable in his later years; Seventy-two fathers have become distant memories of younger sons. On the road that must pass every spring, waves and remnant winter conspire to block the breathing of 72 people. Who said that the future of human modernization must make such a bloody sacrifice with life, when 72 pairs of eyes covered with red coral are tightly fixed on your pen? ...
Thanks to Shanghai, a city of rivers and seas, Marco Lin's ashes were placed in the best place in the tomb area of Binhai Ancient Garden. I spent a little of my savings and designed the best tombstone for Marco Lin. There are models of pine trees, seagulls and drilling boats in front of the tomb. Thank the writer Chen Cun for making a short but good epitaph for me.
Every time I go to Tomb-Sweeping Day, standing in front of Marco Lin's grave, looking at Zhang Yongyuan's face and thinking about our beautiful love, I can't help but sigh. ...
Out of the window in the middle of the night, the autumn wind blew the yellow leaves down, and the dancing leaves bid farewell to the branches, so sad ... My yearning for Marco Lin is like leaves attached to a big tree. Time is merciless. I thought of Marco Lin's kind eyes, sincere smile, his faith, their sacrifices, and Marco Lin's favorite pregnant wife and children. When he stopped breathing, he would never see them again. Marco Lin experienced an unforgettable love with his short life.
A photo of Marco Lin martyr before his death.
Marco Lin, my dear husband, if there is an afterlife, we will spend the rest of our lives together. We will grow old together from black hair, and no one can leave anyone behind. This is our agreement in the afterlife!