In June, the soft wind blew away the powder, in July, the light rain swept away the residual red, and in August, the stars sent away the blessing-guitar plucking. Before looking back, all the glitz went down with the wind.
This is a conversation between my former roommate and me.
From May, 2065438 to May, 2009, I switched from nursing to general practice, and since then, I have embarked on a different platform with my former roommate.
Undergraduate nursing is a four-year program, and clinical medicine (general practice) is a five-year program, so we entered school together on 20 17, and we have to go to practice and graduate in different periods.
My former roommate entered the internship life one year earlier than me.
It's hard to vent the bitterness of my heart when I see my friends going to my own small world one after another, and the words recorded in my leisure time today are also rooted here.
Deep words, shallow words.
"Xinglin" is synonymous with the field of Chinese medicine. Since ancient times, the word Xinglin has been used to refer to the medical field, so doctors often pretend to be "Xinglin middleman".
Hu Yi is a medical college integrating traditional Chinese and western medicine. In Hu Yi, there is a tunnel called Xinglin Tunnel.
Somehow, apart from the autopsy room, the student building, the hanging pot hall, the library and the lake, the deepest and most sticky memory left by my alma mater is actually this 68-meter-long tunnel.
It's like a wonderful box, which can hold joys and sorrows and store secrets. Everyone comes to it.
I met the tunnel cleaner. He got up early and was very happy.
He wants to clean the tunnel before a large number of vehicles pass by, but as far as his action of sweeping leaves is concerned, he has never been in a panic.
"Sand-sand-sand-",the voice is long and far away, and bamboo brooms are rowing on the ground one by one, like a wise man practicing calligraphy, flowing and flowing, born from the heart.
I know that his family lives in the stairwell of several square meters in the basement, but he often hums songs from the 1970s and never finds life hard.
I have seen young couples quarreling in the tunnel. They are reckless but true.
In the verbal struggle, they count each other's shortcomings and are extremely contemptuous; Lover's tears fall with sobs, and every drop turns into blood, hysterical.
In this world, it may always be a quiet behavior to dare to love and hate, but these reckless stories only happen a little more in the ivory tower.
Walking out of the campus will be another common sight. Time flies while sharpening the edges and corners of young men and women, and then don't throw away love and hate.
I met alumni who walked in the tunnel to discuss medical problems, and they were all eager to get to the bottom of it.
Detailed Rules for the Difference between Phenobarbital and Diazepam, Combination and Identification of Five Items of Hepatitis B, Tricarboxylic Acid Cycle Shorthand Skills ...
Four or five years is too short. When the knowledge learned in school is put into clinical practice, it is always difficult to apply.
Four or five years is a long time. Some days are even longer than the pages of domestic and foreign parenting textbooks. The more complicated the knowledge, the more humble people are, and they can automatically dilute their childishness and recklessness without waking up.
Compared with ordinary students, Xinglin Tunnel is a warning to me.
Every time I pass the Xinglin tunnel, I always think of the ignorant girl who once curled up at the mouth of the tunnel and wiped her nose and shed tears.
On the evening of August 26th, 2007, I was deeply impressed with Xinglin Tunnel for the first time.
In late August, I didn't apply for freshman year, and I was an exception. That night, I had a big fight with my father who sent me to the lake doctor downstairs on the second floor, and my mood fell to the bottom.
That night, on my way back to Huizi Building (dormitory) alone, I passed Xinglin Tunnel. It was eleven o'clock in the evening, and all the lights on campus were turned off, except Xinglin Tunnel.
I curled up at the mouth of the tunnel, sobbing, and repeatedly recalled what my father had said: "Since you don't want to make the same mistake, you have two choices: either don't come back or come back to be human!"
I was too young to understand the importance of "coming back". Even now, I may not fully understand it. But every time I think of "coming back", my expectation is branded with my heart.
It's always been like this: After ten o'clock in the evening, the lights on the campus of Hu Yi University will go out for the second time, and the crowd will disperse, leaving only the lights of Xinglin Tunnel, holding them alone.
I think, no matter how to "come back", whenever there is light in this apricot forest, the night sky will be complete again.
Today, when I think of parting, the scene is not so clear. Memories are not melodies, but strong feelings, too strong.
In the winter of 20 19, I went to the hospital for an internship, so I changed the campus and moved my luggage in a hurry. My roommate Pepe has been asking me when I will finish moving to the dormitory, whether I need help, and when I will leave.
At that time, Pepe was already an intern in the doctor's office, and he could only come back to see me when he had time.
Pepe said, "I want to see you again. I'll see you off when you leave. "
On the way to the station, Pepe helped me with my dark blue suitcase. I am wearing a pink scarf, and two people are standing on the cold wind in winter, without much words.
On the bus, the car drove out of a dozen meters away, and I carefully looked back at her shrinking figure in the window:
Just submerged in the cold wind, like ginkgo dead branches on both sides of the road falling into the sound of traffic.
It was not until I got on the green leather train that my body began to tremble. It turns out that if you go here, you won't be together; It turns out that the cold has been moving.
In life, most of them have no clear nodes. This situation is so similar to Xie Chunhua's lyrics:
I have a bad memory, and trivial things in life always rely on post-it notes. I have to recite and learn again and again, and I have lost most of my life without a trace.
But I remember the atmosphere and feelings when the past happened, especially the lights of Xinglin Tunnel, not only the lights, but also the people who warmed me in the cold.
They may also be little girls and boys like me, who are thousands of miles away from home, signing up for a group to keep warm, walking side by side and patiently-exploring this apricot forest.
Should come, will come.
The days in 2020 are always a bit chaotic, and so are the seasons; But you see, this year's rainy season came late, but it also came, in this June and July (lunar calendar).
There is a thick rainy season every year. Every time after the rainy season, a large number of interns and graduates will walk out of this Xinglin tunnel and then scatter into stars all over the sky, emitting strong or weak light in their respective fields.
Whenever we meet, there will always be separation; Returning is a poem, leaving is a word.
Xinglin Tunnel has two rows of light bulbs, with 60 light bulbs. On weekdays, only 15 bulbs are emitting light. Those who leave early and return late can walk through the darkness to the other end of the tunnel by the soft orange light.
Someone will ask me: since you write tunnels, do you know what is at the other end of the tunnel?
Actually, I don't know, but I'm sure that after we walk through the tunnel together, we will say goodbye and exchange blessings at the other end of the tunnel.
Since then, the light of Xinglin Tunnel has gone away. Without the light of the ivory tower, we are our own light.
Outside the ivory tower, looking up at this piece of Xinghai, it is peaceful, quiet and seemingly gentle, but in fact it is like a swamp, and it is difficult to step out when it sinks.
Some stars disappeared and became silent illusions; Everything else has become the thorn of the times. Step on one foot and you can slander others later.
The light of the ivory tower is borrowed. I hope we can give off our own light from the heart to keep out the wind and stifle the possibility of extinction.
Apart from this shallow remark, let it be turned into a blessing.
For example, the picture above.
Topic: Wenhai Forest