Li Wei is a doer who is keen to communicate with parents. She does everything for the children, fights with her son and learns from other parents. She has been trying to find a way to meet difficulties and never gives up. These are all the places I need to learn from her.
Compared with Li Wei, I am a person who gives up easily when encountering difficulties. Sea and land are also my character. In the process of accompanying Hailu, I learned one thing and threw one away, which wasted a lot of money. I didn't have the habit of forcing Hailu, and she didn't want to forget it, so she studied painting, calligraphy, Go, English, Chinese, dance, piano and drum set, and finally only insisted on dancing.
Now Hailu is in art school, and occasionally she is late, and her state is not very good. I know that I am the biggest reason for my child's state. I have no gentle insistence. I gave up easily.
So when Li Wei shared her parenting experience in front of me, she had a sense of superiority. I didn't answer the phone, just listening. She spoke for more than ninety minutes, very excited and triumphant. Her child-rearing result is self-evident, while mine is a failure so far, and the process and result are not satisfactory.
I often feel that there is a whip behind me and I am actively moving forward. How many whips are beating behind Li Wei, but her journey is positive, full of anxiety and hope. And my child and I were beaten to the ground and resisted. We can't lie on the ground and seek freedom. what can I say? Did Li Wei adapt to the society, or was my daughter and I finally abandoned by the world?
Obviously, Li Wei and I took different paths. Li Wei severely criticized me, saying that I hurt my children by saying so. Indeed, my daughter went to art school before finishing junior high school. Li Wei's son is definitely going to take the senior high school entrance examination, and everyone else is going to sunshine avenue. My daughter may have taken a detour. Then who can guarantee that children have the ability to be happy?
I accepted Li Wei's criticism with an open mind. After all, I took a detour in the process of raising Hailu, a very tortuous road. Because my child was depressed, I was married to my child once, and now I just want to keep my child alive. Now children go to art school by subway, and they are also faced with their studies and life at the end of the day. In this way, I am satisfied. Children have dreams, dreams and things to do. What can I pray for?
If you don't compare, just observe my children. She didn't give up her life. She is emotionally stable and her life is safe. There is no problem at present.
I can also find that my heart is becoming more and more stable, which is inseparable from my constant study and reflection. I accept myself more and more. I am a mother, the earth, and I need to pursue the realm of thick accumulation and thin hair. When the child is in trouble, I can stand here firmly, trust and respect the child. The child needs my help and try my best to help the child immediately.
As a parent, I can't accompany my children to the end of my life, but I can walk to the end of my life by myself.
When Li Wei criticized me, my feeling of not being good enough faded. Maybe this is my progress!