I suggest you start by practicing brush calligraphy.
Calm down, practice bit by bit, and write big characters first.
You can follow the facial copybook. Wait until you have a certain feeling, and then practice Pang Zhonghua's hard pen calligraphy with a pen! Usually write with less ballpoint pens, and always pay attention to the structure.
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Work hard, your handwriting will look better every day!
Come on! Where there is a will, there is a way!