When talking, patting the other person's back or shoulder is an explicit psychological hint, and the subtext is that you are under my protection. Between animals, it is a protective action for parents to hide their children under their arms. This kind of action is very positive when the elder is against the younger generation or the superior is against the lower level. But if it is between peers, it usually means that the other party expects to establish a subordinate relationship with you or increase authority in the dialogue. Of course, the other person may just be full of protective desire for you, not necessarily consciously, and can't be simply regarded as malicious. The formation of this habit should have a lot to do with his growth experience, and it may not be changed in one or two sentences. I have a trick here. If your relationship is good enough, if the other person does this action again next time, you can fight back with the same action, which is more oppressive, and he will understand how uncomfortable it is.
(A) the use of language self-suggestion
1, the language is positive, concise and positive. "I can do it", "I will succeed", "I will study" and "I will do well in the exam". Avoid using "I won't fail", "I won't fail", "I can't pass the exam", "I won't get sick" and "I won't feel inferior".
2. Never say to yourself: I am stupid; I can't learn at all; I can't succeed; I'm in trouble; I am terrible; I absolutely can't, I will fail; I can't win. ...
3, the choice of tips, to consider whether it is in line with their actual situation.
4. When the number of "units" changes, the weight borne by the heart will also change: 60 days from the college entrance examination, two months from the college entrance examination; 60 minutes from downtown, from downtown 1 hour. The sports meeting is a long-distance race, with 5 laps and the last 5 laps.
When encountering setbacks, think of "I" as us: How was the exam? ..... We didn't do well in several exams!
(B) the use of environmental self-suggestion
1. When you are confused, quickly adjust the surrounding environment: Donald Duck's virtual cleaning screen.
People who get cold feet should bring more familiar things: pencil boxes and erasers. ...
When you can't concentrate, you should try to get rid of tedious things: don't put unimportant things in sight.
When you are depressed, you'd better read some humorous stories or cartoons: quote two jokes about learning English in the voice of economy.
5. When you are anxious, you'd better not put a clock around you: Rousseau, a French thinker, said: All troubles are your own.
6. When you are depressed, you might as well wear bright and light clothes: if you want to cheer up, you can use red (for example, when you are in a bullfight), and if you want to be calm and calm, you can use cyan ... 7. Monotonous sounds or stimuli can calm your nerves: you can't sleep well at ordinary times, but you can sleep soundly while listening to monotonous clatter on the train.
8. Fast-paced music makes people feel light and confident: you must have heard happy clapping songs. I will sing. Will you cooperate with me?
Clap your hands when you feel happy, clap your hands when you feel happy,
If you feel happy, clap your hands quickly. Look, clap your hands together.
Stamp your feet when you are happy, stamp your feet when you are happy,
If you feel happy, stamp your feet quickly. Look, everyone stomps their feet together.
If you feel happy, clap your shoulder, if you feel happy, clap your shoulder,
If you feel happy, clap your shoulders quickly. Look, clap your shoulders together.
9. Talking to another "I" in the mirror can make you observe yourself calmly.
10. If you associate with people who are familiar with something, you will like it even if you hate it: if you are near Zhu Zhechi, if you are near Mexico, you will be black.
(C) the use of self-suggestion action
1. There is no difference between relieving physical tension and relieving psychological tension: take a hot bath, put on comfortable clothes and pose relaxed.
2. Walking faster will make the melancholy mood cheerful: you can also hum a tune, whistle and give an example of an air conditioner repairman.
3. Loud tone can enhance your confidence: If we have time to play a small game in the future, are you confident that your team will win? Confidence seems to be insufficient. Do you have faith? ...
4. When you have stage fright, you might as well play with the little things around you: fingertip exercise can relieve tension and anxiety, and TV girls like to play with hair movements and expressions when they are shy.
No matter how difficult it is, shortening the physical distance is equivalent to shortening the psychological distance: students with strong self-confidence like to sit next to their teachers, and vice versa. Therefore, if you want to close the psychological distance, you might as well approach someone (talk to a classmate).