The way women with high emotional intelligence deal with contradictions.

1. What smart women will never do after quarreling 1. It's cold war, and even if her husband makes peace, he's still indifferent. It's normal for couples to quarrel. When two people are angry, it is more helpful for them to vent their inner feelings. If a woman always chooses the cold war after quarreling with her husband, she is unwilling to bow her head and make up with her husband. Even if her husband took the initiative to make peace, he insisted and spared no man. I always feel that my husband should spoil himself, but I don't know that a man's patience is limited. If you don't give him a step, he will feel humiliated. No one needs to keep begging another person. When a man feels bored, he will naturally give up trying to please you and turn around and leave. If you continue to ignore your husband after the quarrel, you are undoubtedly pushing him out. 2, has been noisy, it is normal for couples to have disputes because of disagreement. After quarreling with a woman, I don't know how to stop. Always noisy and chattering behind her husband. Sometimes after her husband doesn't talk, she still insists and always feels that she has the upper hand. As a result, it became more and more exciting. A husband who has calmed his anger will be even angrier when he hears that a woman does this. Even continue to quarrel with his wife, in the face of his wife's behavior, some husbands really can't stand it, so they have to slam the door. After the quarrel between husband and wife, the woman still insists on doing such stupid things, which is undoubtedly crowding out her husband. 3. When quarreling, you will expose your husband's scar. Sometimes quarreling equals life, and quarreling over trivial matters is more helpful to the health. But some women are angry when they quarrel, even close to anger. When I spoke, I began to criticize my husband and even refused to accept his scar. The purpose is to make her husband speechless so that she can get the upper hand and vent her emotions. She always thought that she would win by doing so, but who knows, you made her husband speechless in front of her. In fact, because he doesn't want to talk to you at all, you will only make him dislike you. I always feel that I am not raising a wife, but a sharp knife. Once a man has such an experience, he will only avoid you and stay away from you. Try not to get close to you to avoid being stabbed. When you do such a stupid thing, men will never love you from the heart again. He will only empathize with other people's gentle hometown and will not go home. It is a sacred thing to always threaten each other's marriage with divorce. Even if you quarrel, don't say the word divorce at will. It hurts to say these two words. It is said that marriage is that two people support each other and take care of each other, in order to get to the end. If you always talk about divorce and separation, people will think you are unreliable. When you often tell your husband to leave, you are undoubtedly warning him that you are ready to leave. You often say that, and she is insensitive. In marriage, if a woman is not safe enough for a man, she will often say the word "divorce". It will make a man find his next home invisibly to make up for the damage caused by leaving. Second, the practice of smart women after quarreling 1, don't say that many women will break up after quarreling. In fact, the more women like this, the more fearless they seem, but after the real breakup, they are the ones who cry the most at night. Calm down and think about the days and nights you have experienced. Are you really willing to break up like this? So don't watch Ex-3 after a quarrel, don't listen to happy breakups, don't delete chat records in a huff, and don't say goodbye impulsively. 2, don't hurt yourself as a woman, don't think that quarreling means that the other party doesn't love themselves, and the sky falls and begins to give up. Because life goes on, women should learn to take care of themselves. Only with an open mind can you avoid being hurt after a quarrel. 3, understand the original intention of quarreling, women must learn to summarize after quarreling. What are we arguing about? What am I dissatisfied with? What do I want? What am I sad about? Think rationally whether you are really wronged or making a mountain out of a molehill, so as to resolve your emotions. For example, is this matter really that serious? Do you really blame him? Wait a minute. Only in this way can women avoid quarreling with men again. 4. Be calm, but don't have a cold war. The cold war is the worst mode of getting along with men and women, and it is also an endless cycle. The woman used the cold war to prove her sense of existence, and the man used the cold war to maintain his self-esteem. On the surface, the cold war was his own victory. In fact, the cold war is the biggest enemy in love. 5. Give him face and self-esteem. In fact, in a relationship, smart women all know how to find their own steps. In fact, men are not afraid of your toughness, but they can't resist your weakness. You stand in front of him with tears in your eyes, and men's heartache and desire for protection can't help but emerge. It's too late to feel sorry for you again, and there will be anger. 6. When your words are finished, you should also consider his emotions emotionally. A clever woman, you should guide her to express her needs. You have to understand that quarreling is not without reason. Since he will quarrel with you, he must be wronged. Knocking on the blackboard is also the core purpose of the quarrel: to find out the other party's needs and show his own needs. 7, don't mention the past, don't turn over old scores, don't mention predecessors, don't involve the other family and friends, talk about things. Many women will bring up the past when they quarrel, either settling old scores with men, or taking office early, and even mentioning each other's privacy. In fact, this is not only the fuse of the second quarrel, but also shows that you are narrow-minded and irrational. 8. Create a surprise You can create a small surprise, such as a candlelight dinner, a pleasant date, a small gift, etc. It's hard to feel a little sweetness after a quarrel, and it's hard not to heat up feelings! 9. solving the problem since it is noisy, it is worth arguing. You still have to solve the problem after the settlement. If it is not solved this time, it is very likely that the next quarrel will be here. In fact, if you want to fall in love and get married, these small problems have to be overcome one by one. 10, controlling emotions Women must learn to control their emotions after quarreling. Quarrel seems very aggressive, in fact, because both sides have been hurt, people will instinctively protect themselves. You know, quarreling is not a special communication, and smart women will make good use of it to warm their feelings. Fighting is not a debate, you don't have to win, you win the truth, you lose your feelings, you win the truth and you lose. Ways for women with high emotional intelligence to deal with contradictions II. Don't say whose fault it is. When two people quarrel, they usually pull their husbands to reason. When someone gives an embroidery needle, my husband doesn't use it as a wooden stick. Understand that beautiful women are unreasonable even if they don't quarrel, so don't "fairly" emphasize who is wrong. In the eyes of mother-in-law, you don't need a 1 fair and just referee to pull you to reason. It depends on who you love. It is not a third-party platform suggestion, but a "paving stone" that is extracted from each other. It goes without saying that whoever is wrong is often wrong. Second, it is necessary to separate and persuade the uncles and aunts in the community to quarrel. Are people getting more and more energetic? Beautiful women are crazy. It is important not to make a fool of yourself in front of the enemy, so persuasion is separation. Even if the wife and wife are willing to get along, it is difficult to give them a step in private and be patient with the other party who has differences in public. Persuasion alone can also "give full play" to put in a good word for each other. In short, it is difficult for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to get qualification certificates, and there is no need to worry about which side many people think will be biased, which will intensify contradictions. Third, show the authority of the head of the family. In many disharmonious families, it is common to hear the mother-in-law scold her children for "marrying a wife and forgetting her mother, and always listening to her wife everywhere", and the wife scolds her husband for "protecting his mother and crowding me out together". Generally speaking, in a family with a contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, both parties feel that the child (husband) is weak and cannot vent for himself. Therefore, in daily life, some boys had to show the dignity of the head of the family at that time, in order to deter the "mischief" between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, stop the beauty with violence, and solve the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law overnight. Fourth, transfer concentration to make mother-in-law and daughter-in-law consistent. There are many sayings about "foreign countries". At that time, the relationship between friends and enemies was changing. Today they will be friends and tomorrow they will be opponents. Similarly, today's opponents can also be transformed into basin friends who will tide over the difficulties tomorrow. Therefore, to solve the differences between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, we must choose their similarities, let them forget the same internal contradictions and open to the outside world. It goes without saying that the only similarity between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is that they love the same boy-themselves. If you "stay out at night", "have bad hobbies such as gambling" and want to "run away for peace" ... At that time, your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will automatically shake hands and solve the most critical "family crisis" together. In the long-term difficulties, are you still worried that you and your wife can't establish a solid revolutionary friendship?