I remember that when I was in the health school, I came across an anthology of Song Ci at the bookstore on weekends, so I bought it and read it carefully at home. Among them, Lu You's poem "Hairpin Phoenix", which was circulated for ages in the Southern Song Dynasty, especially made me fondle it. "Red crisp hands, rattan wine, spring scenery in the city, willow on the palace wall, east wind evil, a subtle sense of joy, a melancholy mood, a few years of separation, wrong, wrong!" I was instantly moved by Lu You's infatuation with my cousin Tang Wan, and I was also amazed by the kind words in her words. I seem to see Tang Wan's melancholy and bitterness when she retired because of her mother's opposition, and I also seem to see Lu You being unhappy all day because she misses his wife. "Spring remains the same, people are empty, and tears are red and sad. Peach blossoms fall, idle pool pavilions, although Shanmeng is there, it is difficult to hold books, Mo, Mo, Mo! " Lu You wrote this beautiful love without a trace of dust, full of helplessness in deep feeling, and I was moved by it after savoring it carefully. It seems that I have seen the tragic talents and beauties walking in dreamlike words, which makes me wish I had been born 800 years earlier to see the graceful characters in the words.
However, after all, life is not just poetry and distance, but also facing the present. I grew up in ignorance and have spent most of my life now. I have also experienced the trouble of being busy at work and no one taking care of the children to cook. I also experienced the sadness that I was too tired to save the patient when I was on the night shift. The tempering of life has made me not the little girl who only loves roses but not bread. On the way to and from work every day, I worry about my lover and children and care about three meals a day. Every day when I try to live with my heart, the once beautiful and ethereal dream gradually fades away. I sigh that fireworks are beautiful, but warmer. I began to accept and like these ordinary days, and the companionship of my family is the most beautiful fireworks. In the evening, under the warm light, the family had a delicious dinner, although it was not rich. Then the adults watched TV and read books, while the children quietly did their homework. At this moment, although there is no sweet talk or poetry, in my eyes, this is the little luck in the warmest life.
Although the song "Hairpin Phoenix" can still be recited backwards, after years of precipitation, the feeling has been very different. If Lu You really has a crush on Tang Wan, why does she do what her mother says? With such deep feelings, why can't you see a husband's responsibility and concern? ! Now that they are separated, they should be happy. But when Shen Yuan met him, he wrote this affectionate poem "Hairpin Phoenix", which plunged Tang Wan into it and finally made him disappear. "The setting sun on the city draws a corner to mourn, and the Shen Garden is not a pool. Under the sad bridge, the spring waves are green, which used to be a stunning photo. " In the tearful words, the author's regrets in his later years were swept away. Indeed, such feelings will only bring harm. On the surface, it is affectionate, but in fact it is selfish and has no temperature. Perhaps only by being infiltrated by the various flavors of life can we understand that on the long road of life, the romance of an affair can not reach the companionship of running water!
In fact, I often read Tang poetry when I was young. For Du Fu's poems, it may be because he is too inexperienced to understand the pattern of "reaching the peak, looking at the peak, other mountains are dwarfs in the world". I never really liked his poems. I always feel that there is less romance and more sadness between the lines of Du Fu's poems. "The wine in Zhumen stinks, and the road has frozen bones ..." The life he saw was always full of gloom, suffering and desolation, which I couldn't really understand when I was young.
It often takes time to understand an article and a poem, and it is also inseparable from the background of the times to understand the heart of an author and a poet. Just like we learned several articles by Lu Xun in junior high school and senior high school, even if we memorized them by heart, how many people can really understand the national mourning behind the human blood steamed bread? It was not until we, teenagers who grew up under the red flag, experienced countless human vicissitudes one day, that we suddenly understood that the suffering in the world was far more than flowers, grass and sunset. I also found that what I used to think was dull or even dark is actually the truest look of life.
Two years ago, my family and I went to Chengdu to play. In Du Fu's thatched cottage, I read the song Jiangcun written by Du Fu when he was in Huanhuaxi. "Qingjiang is a song that embraces the village. Everything in Changjiang Village is quiet. Since I went to the church to swallow, my old lady has drawn paper to play chess, and my younger son has knocked on the needle to make a hook, but an old friend has given me food, and I want nothing more. " The picture of a warm family suddenly caught my eye, and I suddenly felt that this was the real grounded life. Du Fu's life was full of ups and downs, and most of his time was spent in exile, and he was able to maintain his life with the help of his friends. He has only been married to one person in his life and has been with his old lady all his life. At that time, he was a rare good man. Someone once joked that ten poets have nine scum, and one is Du Fu. Although it is a joke, we can also see the high evaluation of Du Fu. With the growth of age and life experience, I feel that I prefer to read Du Fu's unpretentious poems about life now.
In fact, Du Fu wrote few poems, and he was more concerned about the country and the people. "There are thousands of spacious buildings in Qian Qian, and the poor in the world are happy and calm!" I accidentally read Du Fu's biography. He followed Li Longji all his life and experienced an Anshi Rebellion. Although he was full of enthusiasm for serving his country, he was depressed all his life. After middle age, his life was still poor, so he read the bitterness of the life of the bottom people and wrote poems that were very grounded and close to life. Perhaps only after experiencing ups and downs and hardships of life can we appreciate Du Fu's simple feelings. Indeed, life is not always ups and downs. Only in ordinary days, you can still feel the warm light shining in the sky and still be full of hope for life. This is the real temperament.
Nowadays, the favorite Song Ci has gradually drifted away, and beautiful words, like stars in the night sky, occasionally flash in memory, so consider it a beautiful dream. After waking up, I still work, study and eat, full of fireworks. Piano, chess, books, paintings, poems and wine are all a kind of mood. Who can lack rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea? One night I came home from work and saw my husband busy cooking in the kitchen. In the sunset, this scene is beautiful. Who says that time brings only tree rings? I see the heaviness and understanding behind life.
The sentimental and romantic feelings of the lush years are just because I don't know the real sadness. When I walked through a deep and shallow time, I realized that this practical and steaming day was not the life I wanted. Yes, stay away from those empty sighs, live a good time in front of you as you want, and you will find that life is beautiful after all.