Aya wants to be an enviable person.
After graduating from college, Ling came to Tokyo to be an editor of fashion magazines.
Unexpectedly, Takashi, who claimed to be unmarried, married a model, Mei Ai.
Later, Mei Ai and Long Zhi divorced and opened their own greenhouse.
Mei Ai said, "The ideal marriage partner, his own charm is not very important, but he will support his wife to do what she wants."
This sentence became Aya's life creed.
Aya found her ideal husband and married him according to this creed.
Later, Ling found a guide manual for courtship, and wrote this tutorial impressively.
Extramarital affairs, Ling calmly divorced.
Now, Aya wants to be a person who is interested in life, not an old housewife who only takes children as medals, which is no different from the elements of home decoration.
We can see that Ling, a woman in a small city, changed from a fashion magazine editor to an elite rich second-generation wife, from looking for an ideal husband to support her dreams, and finally gave up her family to become a strong woman in the city who is interested in life.
Behind this seemingly glamorous role change is a firm belief in life and endless fantasy and emptiness.
The person Aya wants to be is the one envied by others; People who are envied will be happy. This is obviously a standard to judge one's feelings by others' evaluation, and what is built behind it must not be [the real self].
Aya chooses a spouse according to the standard of "ideal husband" who loves beauty and "a man who will support his wife to do what she wants"-like a modern good man who respects women and appreciates their dreams. However, even if this standard sounds good, it can't change the fact that it is a criterion. Aya has never asked herself what kind of lover/partner/husband she really wants. She only looks at what kind of husbands others have, and then constructs her own selection criteria, and even directly "brings them".
"King Kong can be broken" says that all things are empty, and how we look at things depends on our marks. We must be aware of and alert to where our marks come from. Aya's impression of a perfect life is definitely not from herself. Then a thoughtful question is, whose puppet did Aya live to be? Whose interest are you making stepping stones for?
It is understandable to work hard in a big city, but the key is why do you come to work hard in a big city?
Tokyo is a big supermarket, full of necessities for a perfect life. By playing the game of monster upgrade, you can buy back good products that are worth the money, such as Takayuki, a rich second-generation business elite.
But why must the rich second generation business elite?
Is it love?
I couldn't help laughing when I asked this question.
When I first came to Tokyo, I met Naoki, a fellow villager. The life background of the two people soon narrowed the distance, got off work together and watched the moon together. Make a birthday pot, warm; Seemingly happy, Aya just walked away, just because she felt that this "Akita-style happiness" was everywhere. Since she came to the metropolis, such a fashionable and gorgeous city, she was too unwilling to end it so simply.
As the owner of a kimono shop, Xiaosan enjoys materials that are not up to her level like an escalator. The emotional demand for kimono shop owners is a red line that kimono shop owners will never continue.
Similarly, when Aya became an "upper class" economically, Haoping, a small fresh meat in the coffee shop, took the initiative to deliver it to the door. However, the "princess friend" in the port area directly started to soak Haoping, who had a good impression, but it really made Aya feel uncomfortable.
What kind of person Aya wants to be is not a specific person.
Aya wants to be a better person than others.
The source of strength here is [comparison], and the support of comparison is [vanity]. Comparison and vanity are bottomless, even Aya herself has been swallowed up.
Doing things because of resentment or fear will only bring more resentment and fear; Because doing things with comparison and vanity will only bring more comparison and vanity.
This explains why Aya has never really loved anyone. Because those contacts are only means and tools to satisfy material enjoyment and break through the class, naturally they will not bring true love and happiness.
This also explains why Ling doesn't have a sincere female friend. Because those friends are used to socialize, gossip and satisfy their sense of superiority. Nature will not bring true appreciation and friendship.
Ling's whole struggle process is a comparative process of constantly despising his own class and longing for the upper class.
Although urban love is romantic, there is no need to despise Akita Love Story.
Life is lovely, but there is no need to look down on housewives with garlic in their hands.
Life is complete without children, but there is no need to define all women with children as people without "medals" except children.
Did you get a look at him? [Contrast] It's terrible because it's a ranking relationship, a competition between hello and me, and an endless chain of contempt.
And this kind of comparative thinking, also doomed to twill people can't achieve great success at work after all. Because of comparative thinking, people can't let go of superiority and arrogance to cooperate. Comparative thinking makes people always love to prove who is right and who is wrong, who is higher than the individual, and in this case, we often establish an antagonistic relationship with others, cooperation can not be carried out, and will soon hit the ceiling.
In fact, Aya has not been promoted or accumulated any capital since she became a manager.
You must be careful when vanity and consumption are combined. Maybe I accidentally turned human life into a propaganda slogan. Wool coat for a happy woman, lipstick for a modern woman, You deserve the best. ......
Think a star has the same paragraph? You can soar three grades in face value, thinking that a Chanel suit can become an elite in the workplace, that a kindle can have connotation and depth, and that a pocket book is a little cute who loves life. .....
In fact, nothing will change, you are still you, almost fireworks. ...
Next, I will share how people build their true selves and live a wonderful life; How to get rid of the chain of contempt and jump out of the pit of comparison; And how to deal with the wave of consumerism and how to start the "primitive accumulation of capital" in contemporary society. ?