01
"Give yourself time to be alone and do the things you like." This article comes from the book "Calm Life" I recently read and the current Qing Xiu combined with the psychological state.
Speaking of being alone, sometimes we worry about trivial matters in life and work, and hope to escape from our partners, children, or work. If we are alone for a while, we will feel that there are no interruptions, no responsibilities, only tranquility. , this is so relaxing.
But if you are alone for a long time, you will feel a little lonely and hope for someone to accompany you. Then I feel bored and turn on the TV, catch up on TV series, or grab my mobile phone and keep scrolling through the updates in Moments, or use chat tools to find friends everywhere.
Although we are alone, it is not truly alone with ourselves. We always need to be surrounded by other things or other people to feel fulfilled.
Perhaps everyone is afraid of loneliness. We are afraid of being separated from the environment and dare not face our true self.
02
This passage is described in the book "The Calm Way to Live", which is related to our resistance to "existing in the present". Because the mood or rhythm of the moment causes us to experience emotional discomfort, we hope to ignore the discomfort by interacting with others and keeping ourselves busy.
At the same time, society is also instilling in us concepts such as "time not working or busy is a waste and is inexcusable." In fact, no matter what others think, it is important to give yourself time alone to do the things you like.
Many people don’t know what they like. As long as they are alone, they feel bored and irritable, and are eager to get back to busy affairs. This is actually a sign of not spending enough time alone.
Being alone requires practice. It requires us to overcome loneliness and realize that the most important thing for us at the moment is to open our hearts to ourselves.
I gradually fell in love with time alone. When I am alone, I can do many things I like to do. For example, you can carefully cook a healthy and nutritious lunch for yourself; you can also play some soft music and read with a favorite book in hand; or you can quietly write an article at your desk; you can also go out to take pictures on a snowy day. A few beautiful photos...
Feeling like you are living in the moment, how long has it been since you were alone with yourself? We have not been aware of our own hearts, and we have not given time to ourselves, so when we are alone, we must make sure that time is spent on ourselves instead of other things.
03
It is also good to read when you are alone. I read a book "Suddenly Wandered to Tibet" a while ago, written by Chen Kun. The book mentioned that he often He likes to be alone, and his way of being alone is to meditate. The word "meditation" often appears in my sight recently.
I think it is best to experience solitude through meditation. A teacher has mentioned to me many times that meditation can be used to improve my practice. It may be difficult to focus on the present moment at first, but I consciously allow myself to do it every day. Meditation experience.
The book "Calm Life" also mentions that the practice of solitude can start with meditation, because meditation can explore and understand ourselves, and can bring us into a deeper experience of the present moment.
Due to chance, I received many meditation courses from a teacher. I will listen to one class every day and follow the exercises. I will share them based on the descriptions in the book. When I start practicing, I only need to give myself enough time. It is enough to spend some alone time just focusing on your breathing. Then, observe your breathing, counting from one to ten with each breath, and then repeat the process. The most important thing is to be in a calm state during this period of time, and don't worry about whether you are doing the right thing.
04
We often say, "One inch of time, one inch of gold" and "Time is money."
You can make money if you don’t have time, but you can’t make it back if you don’t have time. But in real life, many people are busy making money every day, and often equate success with making a lot of money, and forget to The care of the soul forgets to listen to the inner voice.
Maybe we should give ourselves some time to slow down. When we slow down our work pace, we can have time to think quietly, produce more efficient work plans, provide higher quality services, and enjoy a higher quality of life.
Learning to draw boundaries between work and other areas of life to create your own time is just as important as learning to transition between states.
Live in the present and respect the ordinary.
When trying to be alone, practice "unconscious beauty" in a private environment. You can change a new desk lamp, water the potted plants, tidy the room, rearrange the photos or pictures on the desk. It's the books on the shelf.
You can also try to write down your experiences, feelings or any thoughts of the day at a fixed time every day. It can also help us organize our thoughts and clarify the problems in our lives.
In addition, you can also listen to music, go for a walk in nature, read novels and poems, do some handicrafts, draw and practice calligraphy, etc. These are all things we can do when we can be quiet and alone activities.
Give yourself a space to let your mind and body return.