It consumed the best time of my life,
This long fallacy proved to be empty,
I got nothing but wasting time.
Now I forgive this pleasant job,
Because only it can heal the wounds in my heart,
Because of this, as always,
Will not be driven away by me in the storm.
Although poetry was a bad habit when I was young,
But this is also my comfort in my later years:
This is my madness, this will be my reason,
This is my trauma and will be my pain.
Poison used to kill me, but my indulgence
Only this effective scorpion can be treated.
(translated)
Precautions:
Refer to the legend about Dreyfus: Dreyfus was stabbed by Akchir's spear, but was cured by the rust of the spear.
Make an appreciative comment
Du Belle is an excellent lyric poet. In his excellent poems, we can often see his surly sigh about fate, his sadness about vicissitudes of life and his attachment to the scenery of his native land. Starting from his own life experience, he combined all the true feelings that touched his heart into a delicate poetic language, expressing his thoughts and pinning his feelings. This poem is my sustenance, and it is the thirteenth sonnet in Homesickness Collection, which clearly shows this feature of Du Belle's poetry creation.
In the first two poems, Du Belle told us bluntly that he would "forgive" it. So, who is this "it"? Or what is it? He didn't tell us directly. For Du Belle, it "exhausted the best time of my life" and "only it soothed the wounds in my heart". It is "sweet fanaticism" and "happy work". It is like a set of corresponding structures, which contains two different and interrelated parts: one makes people feel sad and the other makes people look forward to it. The emotional experience it brings seems contradictory, but in fact it is harmonious. For such an object with rich connotation, Du Belle skillfully uses contradictory modification to set off complex inner feelings, and get it off her chest quickly.
In the third section, Du Belle finally points out what she wants to forgive, that is "poetry". Du Belle thinks that the awakening of her life began with poetry, and once lamented that she wasted her youth in doing nothing. About 25 years old, he was ill in bed and occasionally leafed through ancient Greek and Roman poems. He deeply felt the power of poetry, and a kind of reverence and yearning for poetry slowly grew in his heart. When he met Ronsa and became close friends, he soon became brilliant and talented. He shifted the focus of his life to poetry, actively promoted the theory of "Seven-Star Poetry Society", created a large number of lyric poems, and made great efforts to promote the art of French poetry. However, during his detention in Rome, he was busy with the life affairs of the Cardinal Palace, tired of dealing with soulless people, and began to suspect that his poems were being consumed by secular things bit by bit. At the same time, those friends who stayed at home didn't waste time, they all made a difference. In contrast, he is more likely to have doubts. After so many years of hard work, is it "empty" and "nothing"? Du Belle didn't get the corresponding return of wealth and reputation before her death. From this perspective, the pursuit of poetry really scarred him.
However, poetry also made him "not lose his mind in the storm". Writing poetry is a kind of spiritual sustenance, which can help people cultivate their minds, enhance their perception, and let their hearts talk to themselves and everything in the world. This is a process of facing the heart directly, and it is also a process of emotional catharsis. Therefore, when Du Belle turned his feelings into poetic language, he also gained inner knowledge. From this perspective, poetry is a panacea for life trauma.
In the last verse of the poem, Du Belle used a good metaphor, that is, he compared the poem to his own "akhil". Akchir, Achilles in ancient Greek mythology, was invulnerable, only his ankle was his achilles heel. This weakness leads our hero to death and eternal glory. In addition, there is another saying about the spear of Achilles. It is said that his spear is so powerful that anyone who is stabbed by it will be in danger, but the rust on the spear can heal the wound. "Achilles' ankle" and "Achilles' spear" both embody a formal paradox and inherent rationality. Du Belle wrote about ink and wash economy, but it influenced our emotions with philosophical and logical meanings, and strengthened the expression effect of language. At the end of the poem, he wrote: "My downfall/Only this effective scorpion can be cured." From this, we can easily see the key point he has been emphasizing: poetry is his sustenance.
(Cai Haiyan)