? Xu zixian
In the spring of 1208, Lu You came to Shenyuan in his later years. Things are different, the vegetation remains the same, and the waterside pavilion stands quietly. The water in the pond is calm, and the inscription on the wall is still clear. Lu You silently stared at the scenery in front of him, and memories of Tang Wan came to mind again.
A poem by the poet Li Bai, "When you, my love, ride a bamboo horse, run in circles and throw your childhood", vividly describes his childhood with Wan'er. Because her mother is Wan'er's aunt, Lu You often played with Wan'er since she was a child. Looking back at that time, it was full of pure memories, just like the lotus in early summer, which was intoxicating and fragrant. Good times always pass by in a hurry, and unconsciously, two people have reached the age of talking about marriage. In everyone's eyes, they are a match made in heaven, so there is no doubt that they tied the knot. From then on, under the cool breeze and bright moon, the two played hand in hand, and beside the spring forest, they sang poems in pairs. That's probably the joy of life; My husband is so affectionate, what else can I ask for?
The spring is bright and the years are quiet. So that the storm was coming that they didn't even notice it. As a male in the family, it is the first task to honor ancestors and pass on incense, but these two tasks are really lacking, which finally triggered the strong dissatisfaction of the mother, especially the anger that Wan'er did not inspire her husband's ambition to gain fame and fortune and her long-lost stomach. However, it is an open secret that he failed to get the title of scientific research before because of official fraud, so it is only a matter of time before he became famous, and now he has become the source of Wan'er's unwarranted accusations; Even more deadly, it seems that God does not intend to pity children, and there is really nothing he can do. However, this is the most intolerable mistake of mother, so she ordered Wan'er to leave Lujia.
It turns out that a pair of mandarin ducks have been committed to each other for a long time, but they have abruptly separated. The most precious gift they received when they got married was a pair of Feng Chai. It was agreed that each of them would take one. Now it seems that it's a pity that "Feng Chai" is really a homonym for "parting". But who can understand the pain of such a cone? Being too depressed will only make people crazy. I secretly dated Wan'er to ease the pain of lovesickness. At this point, the rest of the road was finally blocked, and parents and families on both sides forced them to find new marriage partners. Feelings are deep and shallow, passing by. No, that's too superficial. The pain of where you will go is still clear decades later. Lu You felt that every time he came into contact with this scene, it would be like uncovering the scabbed bedsore and reliving the burning pain of ulceration. Lu you looked blankly at the flowers and trees in the garden and muttered, but I didn't think about repairing them. Perhaps, only such self-abuse can relieve my guilt and yearning for Wan'er. ......
In front of outsiders, I am a national minister who cares about the country and the people, singing "Tiema Glacier is Dreaming" and calling for "Julian Waghann's Northland Day"; In my inner corner, I always have a bitterness of "and a moment that should last forever". I feel that I will never see you again in my life. However, seven years later, on a spring afternoon, I returned to my hometown after working in a different place for many years, and accidentally went to visit the Shenyuan near Yuji Temple in the south of the city. Unexpectedly, we met here. Maybe god has mercy on me. When I saw you, I couldn't help myself. I stared at you out of the corner of my eye and couldn't say a word for a long time. I met your present husband Zhao Shicheng for the first time that day. I can see that he is a kind and polite gentleman, because he generously invited me to drink with you in the pavilion of the waterside pavilion. I don't want to leave you so soon. I looked at you with lonely eyes, and he was slightly embarrassed. Thousands of past events are imprinted on my mind, but I can't get rid of it. So depressed, let's leave. I went to the wall of the wing and wrote down my frustration with a brush. I had a lot of feelings in my heart, but there was no other way but to leave.
When I returned to my hometown three years later, I was like a bolt from the blue when I learned the news. You disappeared shortly after our last reunion in Shenyuan. What happened to Shen Yuan is my happiest memory. Although I know this happiness can't be copied, now you have to discount this memory. God, why are you so cruel to me? No one answered me, and I don't need to answer. Perhaps the only shallow thought left by God is this place, because there are traces of our love here. The second time I came to Shenyuan, on the wall of the wing, the inscription next to me turned out to be a harmonious word, and the handwriting was so familiar-Wan'er's words made me feel like a treasure. Your heart, our past, bit by bit, inch by inch, are all unfolding before my eyes. Looking at the waves in the pond in front of me, I vaguely saw you coming to me with a smile as usual. How I want to immerse myself in this beautiful dream forever and never wake up. The breeze is rising, the sky is getting dark, there is almost no one in the garden, and the gatekeeper is wandering around to close the door. I should leave.
Shen Yuan, you bear my unforgettable memory of Wan'er. I will definitely come again.
He was ordered to go to Fujian and Shu, and then to Jiangxi and Huai, and the military affairs were hectic and moved. Along the way, I was over 60 years old. Although I am far away from Qian Shan, my dream of being promised in the Imperial Academy is getting deeper and deeper. Back in Lin 'an, I am eager to come to Shenyuan just like an old friend who is eager to meet after a long separation. However, the more we yearn for it, the less recourse we have, Wan'er. Maybe time really dilutes our telepathy. Looking for it, I still can't see you. I don't complain, I'm not disappointed, I just want to savor our past, even if there is only a penny left, it's better than silence. Nothing seems to have changed in Shen Yuan, except that I am getting older. I don't know when I will come here next time, so I will try to think more. Although the story remains the same, you are among them. Although I have mixed feelings, I am very moved every time I recall it. I know you like poetry. I copied the poem "Hairpin Phoenix" that we sang together, and I also brought the poem that I wrote after the last garden visit. Let me recite it for you:
My original "Hairpin Phoenix":
Red crisp hands, Huangteng wine, Mancheng spring willow. Dongfeng evil, with a faint heart and a cup of sadness, has been separated for several years. No! No! No!
Spring is the same, people are empty, and tears are red and sad. Peach blossom falls, idle pool pavilion, although the mountain alliance is there, it is difficult to hold books. Mo, Mo, Mo!
Guihe ci "Hairpin Phoenix";
The world is thin, human feelings are evil, and it is easy to fall when the rain is sent late. The breeze is dry, the tears are gone, and I want to worry about it. Difficult! Difficult! Difficult!
People become different, today is not yesterday, and sick souls are often thousands of miles away. The bugle sounded cold, the night was dim, people were afraid to ask questions, and tears pretended to be happy. Hide, hide, hide!
And two poems I wrote last time: Shen Yuan.
On the city, the setting sun draws a corner to mourn, and the Shen Garden is not a revival pool platform. Under the sad bridge, the spring waves are green, which used to be a stunning photo.
After 40 years of broken dreams and fragrance, Mr. Liu of Shenyuan doesn't blow cotton, but this body is a tribute of Shan Ye's soil and water, and there are still traces.
Wan'er, did you hear that? It began to rain unconsciously. I face the rain and let the muddy tears flow freely. Once, I didn't believe in reincarnation, but now I'd rather that life can really be reincarnated. Maybe I will have a chance to see you again in the near future. I use this idea to comfort myself, stumbling along, hoping to meet you again at some corner along the way.
The weather in the imperial court is getting worse and worse. I will fight to defend the country and the frontier against the Jin Dynasty, even if I die in battle. If so, it will be a relief for the miserable Li people and themselves. However, the imperial court did not give me such a special experience. I still returned to my hometown in my twilight years and watched my old friends leave one by one. I feel that I have few days left, and I am secretly glad to meet you in another world, which often makes me look forward to the coming death, but God has been slow to give me such an opportunity. In that case, I'll try my best to come to the shrine and tell you the truth so as not to be unfamiliar next time. Wan'er, do you think I'm a little ridiculous? I know that when people die, everything becomes empty. Then let me carry out this memory thoroughly, because without the afterlife, there will never be this memory. There is only one place left in the world-Shenyuan. So, let me finally write a passage for our story as a memorial to Shen Yuan:
The flowers of Shenjiayuan are like brocade, and I knew half of them that year.
I also believe that beauty will eventually become soil, and it is too late to dream!
After writing, Lu You in the twilight stared at the green waves in the pond, thinking back to the figure of Tang Wan in the waves, and fell into endless reverie, and a happy smile gradually emerged on the poet's face. ...
More than a year later, Lu You passed away. ...
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