The rhyme of the first poem is quite good, but I don’t know if it is for the sake of rhyme, which dilutes the elegance of the poem, and the meaning is too simple. If it must be expressed so clearly, then in terms of meter More attention should be paid to make up for the shortcomings of the poetry itself. , it is not enough to just stop at rhyming. Take your first sentence as an example, describing autumn rice, you can try not to write it so colloquially. You can compare it to golden waves, which will be more vivid. By analogy, there are also more colloquial expressions below. You can change the sentences accordingly.
The contrast between the front and back of the second song is a bit uneven. The correct sound should be the sound of the flute instead of the sound of the whistle. I think the word "Heart Has Been Sealed" should be changed to "Heart Has Been Sealed" or "Heart Has Been Sealed". It won't look too abrupt. There is also the issue of 廄廄. The last word of each sentence is unclear and there is no sense of rhyme in reading. The last sentence didn't express the twist of meaning well. The wind in early spring should be relatively cool. It's not good to be blown by a cool breeze when you're cold. I know you originally wanted to express warm wind, but you didn't specify the time. Misunderstanding.
The third poem is okay, but the second half needs to be studied
The fourth modern poem has a deeper conception, but the final meaning is a bit vague, that is, the entire poem The part is not closely related to the theme. I know that modern poetry is largely about free expression and giving its own meaning, because I also write some ancient poetry and modern poetry, but in the end it still has to be read by others, and I have to consider what others will do after reading it. Do you understand what you want to express? In particular, do not forget the origin of poetry just for the sake of its beauty.
My humble opinion... Some places may be harsh, please forgive me.