Besides, who are the comments for? Students and their parents. Can they understand this seemingly ancient poem? Do you understand what the teacher thinks of himself or his fake child? Is the teacher using such "poetry" comments to show off his language skills, or to stimulate students' love for ancient poetry?
I think comments should be direct and to the point. As for whether it is an ancient poem or not, it is not that important. Based on students' daily performance, evaluate realistically and put forward requirements and hopes. Because the purpose of comments is to let students and parents know their own advantages and disadvantages in order to go further.
At the end of the semester, every primary school head teacher is making a phased evaluation of the students in this class. I have been teaching for more than 20 years, and the writing of reviews has also changed. In the past, I used to start with the words "The students are at school …". In the comments, I will write about the advantages and disadvantages. Some strict teachers may write more about the disadvantages and expect to write more. The tone of the comments is a bit condescending and blunt.
Later, the education department asked students to be evaluated with encouragement and expertise, so when the evaluation begins with "You are a child of xx", the language such as "The teacher hopes …" will also be used. The teacher's evaluation tone became more equal. I think we should take care of children's psychology, let them realize their own advantages and find confidence.
However, the evaluation of this kind of ancient poetry is also a new attempt. Judging from the teacher's comments, it also pays attention to encouraging praise and discovering the advantages of children. If children can understand it, they can also infiltrate the knowledge of Chinese studies into students. However, the content of the poem is limited, and it is difficult to write the child's performance clearly in only twenty words. Therefore, it is best to use encouraging language and professional knowledge, and the infiltration of Chinese knowledge can be carried out in ordinary classrooms.