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"I have nothing to do with her. You can't help it if you don't believe me. "
"It's very kind of you, but it's my fault."
"I don't want to fall in love for the time being."
These are the traditional subtext of love rat.
Men sometimes don't speak as straight as we think. They often say specious things. If you don't understand, you are likely to fall into their routine.
02
A woman once asked me that my boyfriend cheated on me and wanted revenge. His company attaches great importance to the conduct of its employees, and my father promoted him. If he is in trouble with his company or my father, he will definitely lose his promising job.
But I wanted to make it right. In order to show a good sense of value, I held my breath and didn't make public. I only showed my cards to my boyfriend and his family.
My boyfriend's mother likes me very much. Although she has a little temper, she always knows wisely. Under her persuasion, her boyfriend broke up with that woman. When he made up with me, he said that the other party provoked him first. He happened to have sex with her. I believe him.
Later, less than half a year later, I found that he was still in contact with San Xiao. I cried and asked him why he did this to me. He said, I can't bear to part with you, and I can't let her go. Am I a bad person?
The woman asked me, I don't know what to do now. His career is booming, and I don't want to ruin him. Besides, he said he felt he had realized his mistake. Do you want to give him another chance? I've been with him for almost three years. I love him very much and don't want to give up all my efforts.
I said, don't think so much yet. If you understand what he means, please think it over.
The first time he cheated, he said another woman hooked him up first. He is very careless. He loves you, but if he doesn't want to cheat, can that woman force him by any means?
I ruled it out because of his career and his mother's influence, and tentatively said that the woman would do whatever it takes. Six months later, if he still has contact with this woman, he will be in trouble.
Generally speaking, a man will have an emotional affair because of his body. You think he is greedy for novelty, but he is wrong, because it is she who cheated after half a year, which shows that he is not just greedy for his body, and the emotional value she provides is higher than yours.
He said, I like both of you. Is he a bad guy?
I don't know if he is bad or not, but he wants to use your father to get promoted to a higher position and get the love of another woman, so he must be love rat.
According to you, you have a choice because of his family background. There is no need to feel sorry for a man who doesn't love you so much, just see if you are willing to give up.
03
The day before yesterday, my friend Xiao An invited me out for tea. It turned out that she had just quarreled with her boyfriend and didn't want to stare at each other at home, so she asked me out to chat temporarily.
Speaking of it, the reason is that Xiao An's boyfriend has changed jobs again, but as far as I know, her boyfriend has changed four companies a year, so it is not good for his career to change jobs frequently.
Xiao An said that the first is the contradiction between colleagues, the second is that the boss is unhappy, and the third is that the treatment is not good. The company that just resigned is well paid, and he always feels overtime.
At that time, he resigned without consulting. I was angry and said something to him, and he quarreled with me.
I asked, don't be too sad, men are proud, are you too harsh?
Xiao An said that on the day he resigned, I came back from working overtime. He told me that he had resigned. Seeing that he was still in the mood to watch the game, I instantly turned off the computer and asked him why he resigned. He said he didn't want to do it. He works overtime every day.
I asked what to do with this month's rent, and he said you were still here.
I said you felt tired, right? As for me, I work overtime almost every day, and sometimes I don't go home until ten o'clock.
For more than a year, I have borne the rent, water and electricity alone, and I have done all the housework of cooking and mopping the floor. What about you? Besides smoking and drinking, you stay in front of the computer and watch the football match every day after work? What have you done for our future? I'm disappointed in you.
Ann continued, do you know what he said at that time?
He said, you don't know that I am like this. I am used to being lazy. Don't say that. Well, suit yourself, and then take a shower and go to bed. I nearly broke up with him.
I said, if you listen to this, you are making money to support your family. He is responsible for being beautiful and telling the truth at home. Your boyfriend is so irresponsible. I really feel that you and he changed the hero's script. So what are you going to do next?
Ann said, I don't know. Sometimes I really want to break up, and sometimes I feel that he has no sense of responsibility and dedication now. Maybe things will get better if he is bigger.
I shook my head, Ann. Do you really understand what he said? He means that I am like this. You can stay with me if you like. I don't care about not being together. There's nothing to change anyway.
On the surface, he gave in. In fact, he made it clear that he would eat soft rice to the end.
When you talked to that point, he didn't even coax you, but he used a threatening and indifferent attitude to bet that you wouldn't say goodbye.
04
Some people say that women in love have zero IQ.
In fact, it's not that the IQ line has dropped, but that a woman who is in love usually chooses to trust each other and is unwilling to accept the fact that he doesn't love himself.
I once met my female university teacher, who is in her twenties and still unmarried. It's not that she doesn't want to get married, nor that she doesn't have a man to chase her, but that she is waiting for someone.
That man was not in China at that time. She went to see him off before he left. He said to her, 30 years old, let's get married before you marry me.
The school magazine also specially interviewed her at that time, and the article quoted the sentence that the man said, which was touching and extremely sad.
But she is now in her thirties, and the man hasn't come back. He failed to let her get married and have children abroad, and she missed many good men for him.
30 years old, you are unmarried, I am unmarried, so let's get married. The real premise of this sentence is that I am unmarried. I think you are ok, but I don't have to marry you. If I meet a better woman, I will marry her.
So this sentence is equivalent to-come on, be my spare tire.
To be a woman who is not carried away by love, the first thing to do is to understand the subtext of men, so as not to fall into love rat's routine.
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