I have a huge preference.

Not long ago, when I was painting Zhihu, I got to know a new term called megaphobia. People with megaphobia are afraid of huge things, such as tall buildings and behemoths in movies, similar to deep-sea phobia. However, I am just the opposite of this phenomenon. Personally, I am extremely interested in and even obsessed with huge things. Maybe I prefer giant things.

As an out-and-out monster fan, I rushed to the cinema on the first day of the release of Godzilla 2, and saw the huge monster figure on the screen, which was simply blood spray. Besides monsters, giant buildings, clouds in the sky and even the giant galaxies in the video fascinate me. I often wander into huge creatures in my dreams and completely ignore me.

I especially like Junji Ito's Hellstar. An extremely huge monster planet came over the earth, and its huge eyes looked down on everything on the ground and eventually swallowed up the whole earth. Later, I learned that the prototype of Hell Star is Gueiros, the ancient god in Cthulhu mythology. Taking this as an opportunity, I also searched the giant creatures in fairy tales, such as earthly python, Leviathan, Bahamut and so on.

On the internet, there is a set of analysis about phobia, but there is almost no information about phobia like me, but I am willing to believe that there may be many people like me, so I decided to reverse my phobia.

In the eyes of phobia patients, huge objects will annihilate their sense of existence and deepen their unsafe factors, thus causing anxiety and even panic. However, what giant lovers may need is to erase their sense of existence.

I feel that in my daily life, I am a role with no sense of existence. Even if I write words, most of them are mainly in the third person. As I get older, I want to keep a low profile more and more. For self-motivated, there is no chance.

In this way, I would rather take it with me in a narrow space and become an otaku without leaving home, just like hiding in a fantasy land to escape from reality.

I like observing clouds, and I also like observing the starry sky. I hope to realize my smallness and powerlessness, and the huge objects just give me a sustenance.

In fact, I will hardly mention my hobby to anyone, not because I am ashamed of it, but just because it is trivial.

Maybe everyone has a trivial but established little habit, like some kind of obsessive-compulsive disorder. In fact, analysis is illogical, but they want to pursue it, although others may not understand it. And these trivial hobbies are also part of our lives.