How to understand the word hesitation and loneliness in Rain Lane?

Loneliness implies that the poet's bosom friend is hard to find and lonely. I hope to meet the girl who is "as sad as lilac."

Original text (excerpt):

Holding an oil-paper umbrella alone

Wandering in the long, long

Lonely rain lane, I hope to meet.

A girl as sad as a lilac.

She is lavender,

The fragrance of cloves, the sadness of cloves,

Sorrow in the rain, sorrow and hesitation;

Extended data:

Creative background:

This poem was written in the summer of 1927. At that time, the whole country was in a state of white terror Because Dai Wangshu participated in progressive activities, he had to stay at a friend's house in Songjiang, chewing the disillusionment and pain after the failure of the Great Revolution in loneliness, and his heart was full of lost emotions and hazy hopes. The poem "Rain Lane" is an expression of his state of mind, which is intertwined with the dual emotional appeal of disappointment and hope, disillusionment and pursuit. This feeling was common at that time.

Appreciate:

In Rain Lane, the poet used symbolic images and image group to construct lyrical space, conveyed inner feelings, and integrated the artistic nutrition of China's ancient poems, especially the graceful poems in the late Tang Dynasty and the Five Dynasties. Besides, the artistic success of this poem lies in its harmonious musical beauty.