Notes on Amir (45)

People! Being kind to others is your first duty: be kind to people of any status and age, as long as they are no different from human beings. What virtue can you find besides kindness? Love children, help them play games, make them happy and cultivate their lovely instinct. Who among you has not always been attached to that childhood that is always smiling and quiet? Why not let naive children enjoy fleeting time and deprive them of extremely precious wealth that they will never spoil? The first few years of their lives, like those of your life, are gone forever. Why should those fleeting years be filled with sadness and pain? Fathers, do you know when death will take your children away? Never deprive them of the short time that nature has given them, or you will regret it; As long as they can feel the happiness of life, let them enjoy life; No matter when God calls them, don't let them die without tasting the joy of life.

There is nothing wrong with loving children, but not only happiness is love. Rousseau seems to be a happy supremacist. It seems that he once said that everything can't follow the child's desire. Why doesn't it seem so advocated now? Sometimes pain is necessary. As long as it is conducive to the growth and health of children.

How many people will rise up against me! I heard the cry of the false wise man from a distance; They constantly make us lose our nature, they despise the present, and they constantly pursue the future that we cannot catch up with. They insist that we leave our present state and go where we can never reach.

No one is against you, Rousseau. Don't make enemies.

You answer me, it's time to correct people's bad tendencies. In childhood, they feel the least pain. It is at this time that they should be made to suffer more, so that when they reach a sensible age, they will suffer less. However, who told you that you can arrange whatever you want, and who said that you won't do more harm than good to a child's tender heart in the future? How do you know that torturing children can save you some trouble? Since it is not certain that the present pain can alleviate the future pain, why does he have to bear so many disasters that he can't bear now? How can you prove to me that the bad tendency you are trying to cure is not from your wrong practice, but from nature? Your hope is that he will be happy at least one day, but at present, you have made him miserable. What a terrible foresight! These vulgar theorists confuse children who indulge in freedom and happiness with spoiled children, and we must make them understand that there is a difference between them.

Indulgence and freedom and happiness are sometimes difficult to distinguish, but the result is certain.

In order not to pursue fantasy, we must not forget how to adapt ourselves to our own environment. In the order of all things, human beings have their own position; In the order of life, childhood has its place: adults should be adults and children should be children. Assign everyone a position, fix him in that position, and deal with people's desires according to human nature. That's all we can do for people's happiness. The rest will be transferred by various external factors, but external factors are not our decision.

Rousseau emphasized the orientation of people at different stages, but this orientation needs to be determined according to external conditions, so it is difficult to have a set of universally applicable parenting books, only some general basic principles. Adults should be treated as adults and children as children. This assertion is very accurate. It's just a little difficult to operate.