Sunshine is charming,
I took away the virginity of my first love,
Sunset slaps your cheek,
This situation, this scene,
It broke my heart,
Burn your image silently.
In the depths of memory.
Seeing you again at the beginning of the light rain,
Foggy and rainy,
I stare at you with old ideas,
Deep double eyelids,
Dark oil umbrella sets off your bronze color,
This man, like this,
Let me be firm,
When I was there, when you were there,
Never been polluted by life.
The crowd began to creep in the hustle and bustle, so I should step forward.
Or look back and see that the road is covered with water droplets. Can you tell me, Moru?
In fact, there is someone in everyone's heart that we can't bear to forget.
Even though our story is over, I believe.
Many people are willing to wait for the return of love in situ.
Love is humble,
But once you fall in love, you can't forget them!
Am I right?
Mo Lu, you are the biggest injury in my life.
Without the familiarity of childhood friends,
Without the excitement of love at first sight,
No, it's nothing,
But I'm still in love
∑ The first part "Mo Lu: How does love hurt?"
This small town in the south of the Yangtze River washed by Lan Yu has a clear picture. There are still many old people playing mahjong in the teahouse on the old street, and there is a lot of noise from time to time. The stone bridge on the river is still so quiet, and occasionally a few kittens nap on the pier; Nothing has changed. I still look at your direction through the old window in the attic. The sunshine is around my cheek, and you still pass by my jewelry store at three or four in the afternoon, but today you are indeed happier than yesterday, and a breeze blurs your face. You are still that pure white T-shirt, blue cowboy. After so many days, I am still so small in your life. ? Your brisk footsteps quickly passed through my door, but every time I have a full 24 hours to remember. Think of your scent, smile in the corner of your eyes, and serious expression.
The sunset slowly scribbled on the earth wall of my house, and I fell asleep in the hot flashes. After a while, I saw you and me standing on the roof of the school many years ago, and looked up to see your eyes. I clearly remember that it was the first time I met you.
Meeting is an inevitable accident! Everything in this Jiangnan town is unique, from retro houses to cups for drinking coffee. It's quiet here. Everything is unique. The only river, the only cinema and the only good school. That was my junior high school for three years, and it was the best junior high school in town. In fact, the town where I live is really a veritable town, and the students from junior high school are still those from high school. This is how you and I met in the inevitable accident at school. That day was the first day of the opening of the school's annual art festival. During the break, I was fascinated by the literary and art committee members in your class. You answered my question in a gentle voice, but why did you use Mandarin? You should use Trump, otherwise I won't think you are a little conceited and I won't pay attention to you anymore!
That year, our class performed badly in the art festival, so I vowed to take revenge the next year. The next year, I wrote a song with the guitar I had just studied for half a year, and was miraculously selected to perform in a cultural performance. To tell the truth, I didn't believe it at that time either. If you hadn't chosen our song, I might have always thought you were conceited. But I gradually found that you are a very gentle man, and you and the people around me have a different temperament. I wish the story would end here, but that Christmas I finally convinced myself to come to an incredible conclusion, that is, I fell in love with you, who is my teacher. A few days after Christmas, in the dusty rehearsal room, I saw you playing the piano, and the winter sun shone sharply on you. I didn't think highly of you at that time. I just told myself that I would try to remember you and this man I shouldn't love. Later, I learned that you are a whole round older than me. I also heard that your marriage is happy and your daughter is clever. Actually, you don't have to be so nervous every time you mention your daughter. At least for me, I won't hurt you and your family. If I were an ordinary woman, if I didn't love you so much. This must be the end of the story, but my love is so crazy.
You always like smoking when we rehearse. In winter, all the windows work normally, and the whole room smells of your smoke. I'm very sensitive to the smell of cigarettes, even a wisp can't stand it, but I expect your cigarette butt to light, which is your unique smell. After the performance, I stood in the corridor on the third floor, watching your busy figure on the first floor. I said goodbye to you in my heart. I thought, why do ordinary people like you make my world unbalanced? I'm ready to brutally delete you from my life, but why did you let our little band participate in the provincial competition? Your words warmed my cold heart. For the next two months, we rehearsed together every day, and I would find various excuses to go to your office every recess. I will carefully observe what style and color clothes you are wearing today. I will also care about whether you are happy or not. Those years were the most beautiful and innocent days of my life.
Mo Lu, Mo Lu. Sounds like you and I will always be strangers. I was a little girl when I fell in love with you. I can only hide behind you and watch your happy family silently. That helpless mood makes me feel so happy, because I can see your happiness. Isn't this the fate that God gave me? . My love is very humble. Moru, I didn't expect you to do anything to me from beginning to end. I just like it very simply. Just like a wild lily on the roadside, it never expects the prince floating around it to stay for it, but it is always waiting silently. Although it doesn't know what it is expecting, it has been waiting firmly.
My friend Jia Jun invited me for an outing, which was the seventh day after the senior high school entrance examination. Blue sky and white clouds, tacky to the extreme. A group of friends who have known each other for three years are listening to songs and chatting on the grass by the river. Without a trace of earth-shattering, it seems that the world has never turned, so I graduated without even saying goodbye to you! Goodbye is to meet again. You may never want to see me again. I've been your stranger from the beginning. I don't know who put the song "Mo Zhi" that I wrote a year and a half ago in my little tape recorder. Familiar melodies and stinging lyrics make me want to go back to that shabby rehearsal room and feel your breath again. "Mo Lu, will this song remind you of me after years of ticking?" I asked stupidly in my mind.
"Hui expression, is your birthday in a few days! How are you going to spend it? Do you want us to attend your birthday party? " Jia Jun asked casually.
"I think I still live with my mother! Last year, you fell out with my family. Spend your sixteenth birthday with your mother! "
"Sixteen years old is the flower season! Why do you put such a sad expression on your lips? "
Then there was my long silence.
How can sixteen be unhappy? This means that I am one step closer to you, but Mo Lu, time makes me grow, but it also makes you old! I have always liked and feared the sentence "I was born before you were born, and I was old when you were born." How I wish I could be friends with you. I don't want to make you unhappy for a second. I want you to know that even if the whole world abandons you, I still love you and am still willing to listen to you, but you won't even give me such a small chance. Even if one day you are old, I will regard you as the most precious corner of my life.
I once fantasized about what would happen on my sixteenth birthday, but when that day really came, I just wanted to go back to the night of my fifteenth birthday. I met you by accident in the noisy stone street in town. What a carnival that moment was! In a busy street, in such a small town, among so many people I know, why did I meet you, but you were the only one? Why did you make me unconsciously tell you that today is my fifteenth birthday? Why did you insist on buying me a drink? Why did I chat with you for an hour? Since life has separated us forever by age, why did we meet like this again? That night is my sweetest memory of you, the dim light in that bar, the strong alcohol in that milkshake and your gentle eyes. When the crowd gradually dispersed and recalled what I had said to you, I stumbled back to my home and my heart was still beating. This is my best first love. I stayed on the wooden bed repeatedly, didn't sleep a wink all night, and my mind was full of your figure.
In fact, the story has been told for so long, and I have to tell you honestly, Mo Lu, on my sixteenth birthday, it was rainy and rainy, and I buried everything about you in my garden, including the program of the cultural performance, the honor roll, the music score you helped me correct, and the photos of our little band with you, which were linked to my thoughts about you. I think this mindless story should also have an ending! I covered the soil bit by bit with a small shovel, but your gentle smiling face kept flashing in my mind. I suddenly felt useless and even forgot how painful a person was. Do you know that?/You know what? Do you know that?/You know what? At that moment, my heart seemed to be cut off from the complicated world, just as my memory of you was proved to be cut off from the world by dirt. But you don't know, and you don't know, because I am so humble in love from beginning to end, and I am afraid to mention this absurd love to others. I am careful to protect my so-called dignity. But once you are in love, will you still have dignity?
High school. I still chose this town, in fact, there is only a small part about you. I am really a stupid turtle sister. I think in a small town, there may be more opportunities to meet unintentionally! Three years in high school, I learned to forget every second. The new music teacher is a beautiful girl in her early twenties. Jia Jun said that what I miss so much about Molubi is much better, and I can't swear in Mandarin. I couldn't help laughing after listening, yes! I have several Sichuanese who speak Mandarin in my life! What a sad smile.
In sunny September, I saw you again in the gym of my new school. You're still leading the game. The weather is fine and has a natural smell, just like when I first met you. You brought me to the same gym, but we must compete for a place on this familiar stage. That year, I was a sophomore and wrote a musical by myself (I forgot to tell you that I stopped writing songs after junior high school and never picked up my favorite guitar to play). I thought you would still play small bands and original songs, but why does fate always torture me so much? In the noise of that day, I have forgotten where I was, but I still remember the day when your white shirt with aperture was so dazzling many years later. When my friend shouted happily in my ear, "Han Dao, Han Dao, we entered!" " I told you! Your play is so good that you are sure to get in! "I should be very happy. This is the first musical written and directed by myself in my life. I spent two months with the actors to overcome many difficulties, and now I finally have a good result, but I can only look at you with sad eyes. You came up to me slowly and said in my ear in a light Sichuan dialect tone, "Wei Wei, well done!" "Not the kui is my student!" When I woke up, it was like a lifetime ago, leaving your back in the street. "Liu Mo, why did you bend over to say those words in my ear today! This makes seemingly ordinary words so confusing. " This is the mood I wrote down that day, and I am really confused. What happened after that made me even more puzzled. That winter, you came into my life again as the instructor of our musical. This time, I am even more anxious because you appointed me as the heroine of the musical. That's a story I wrote about youth and the legend of shells. The heroine in the play is a sad and sentimental Dream Girl. There is no denying that when I wrote this play, I wrote it according to my prototype. However, it is difficult for people who don't know me to connect me with the heroine in the play. At that moment, I was very happy and confused. At that time, I entered the crew with a very uneasy mood. In the first game, I pretended to be relaxed and talked and laughed with everyone, and I was not nervous at all. Even the senior sister next to me said that I have a good brain! But God knows how nervous I am! My legs are shaking. At the beginning of the quarrel, you took me aside and said to me with your trademark smile, "Don't be nervous! Yes! " I said to him unconvinced, "How do you know I'm nervous?" ! I easily told my senior that I had a good attitude! ""don't try to be brave, it's okay, come on! "I thought strangely for a long time. Why do you know I am nervous? Actually, we don't know each other very well, do we?
It turns out that some people can't be washed away by the torrent of years, because they already have the same time plate as you. This is a wound that we can't escape! Even if he never loved!
The days passed like this. Sometimes we rehearse on the beach at dusk. You still use the tone that emphasized swearing four years ago, but you never yelled at me. You always treat us haughtily. Many people say that you are the devil's guide behind your back. I always feel lukewarm in front of you, but I can't bear to part with you. My heart will always follow you to every corner. You are still riding the motorcycle four years ago, with a blue body and a red trunk. You still like to wear T-shirts and jeans. For this reason, many people say behind your back that you deliberately pretend to be young, but I like your style. At that time, you always walked in front of my house, and I was used to your steps. Every afternoon at three or four o'clock, I always hide in my attic and wait for your arrival. I have always loved you humbly, without any expectation, and I never know what I am waiting for silently. Actually, the answer is that I went to your house to get the script that day.
I left the script with you that day, but you accidentally took it home. Unfortunately, there is one place that must be changed immediately. I put on my new white sweater and rushed to your house excitedly. As a matter of fact, your house is opposite mine. When I found your house number, I found the door unlocked. I pushed the door in and saw a super embarrassing scene. The living room is a mess. You and your wife are very violent. When you saw me, your eyes hurried away for a few seconds, and you regained your old smile. You turned around and found the script from the mess and handed it to me, but I took the script and hurried away without saying goodbye. I'm so disappointed, because your house doesn't have the big floor-to-ceiling glass and piles of musical instruments I expected. In my subconscious, artists should have these things! Later, I gradually realized that we are all ordinary people struggling to survive in this world. No one is like anyone else. There is no difference between artists and ordinary people, only between men and women.
On the morning when we went to the province to compete, you told me to arrive a little earlier than others, and the sky was clear as blue. You invited me to eat fried dumplings and solemnly apologized to me for what you saw at your house that day. I tried to ask you why, and you said, "My wife wants to divorce me, and she wants to take her daughter to Canada." Your tone is calm, as if it didn't happen to you. I asked, "You love her, so you don't want her to go, do you?" You said "I love my daughter" seriously, then patted me on the head with a smile and said, "Forget it! What does the little girl know? " I refute you disapprovingly; "I am not a little girl, I know what love is!" Then there was our long silence. I think your silence means that you know what I think. I was in a panic. how do you know You are sad because your daughter is leaving! What you said the other day made me extremely doubt that you don't love your wife at all.
In fact, what I remember most clearly in this memory is the faint fragrance floating on your body when you put a scarf around my neck. That's the smell of cigarettes that I'm familiar with at ordinary times. Very elegant. Very elegant. When missing has become a habit, I will try my best to find a perfume shop to smell and find your smell, but I still don't know what it is, whether it is your facial cleanser, your hand sanitizer, the smell of your daughter, or the smell left by you and your wife at night. On that day, the sun came out and your slender fingers fluttered between my neck. I was fascinated by the smell and posture. At that moment, I really wanted to hold you tightly and say to you in a gentle voice, "Molu, in fact, I have loved you for a long time." But I never have, and I can't. I am a very traditional girl. This will also bring you trouble, won't it? You are my teacher. If I do that, what are we? Besides, we won't even have a teacher-student relationship then! When I came back, the whole bus was taking a nap, but I looked at you in the front row and talked with another teacher very speculatively, because I clearly knew that when the bus entered the school, the moment I said goodbye to you would be our last and only conversation. Although I was extremely disappointed, this was fate. Mo Lu, you are the eternal pain of my youth.
At the end of our story, I hurried into the third year of high school and had no spare time to miss you. I will only shout at the bottom of the empty fifth floor when I solve a 3+X math problem in four hours: "Mo Lu, let's cheer together!" " Ironically, when I first walked into the college entrance examination room, in an unusually quiet classroom, I saw you sitting on the podium and smiling at me, and my heart missed half a beat. Moreau, how could it be you? The whole town, three or four middle schools, each with more than 50 examination rooms, why should we be together? Is our fate good, or has fate been playing tricks on me? When I was collecting papers in my last class, you said in my ear, "Wait for me at the school gate, something has happened." Oh, my God, you have something to tell me. What could it be? I guess in my mind in despair and look forward to it. This is the first time I have expected anything from you. Ten minutes later, you parked your sapphire motorcycle at my feet, saw me sweating profusely, and said with a smile, "How can the college entrance examination make you nervous?" Yes, you were nervous when you rehearsed! Little girl! "I thought for a long time and responded to you with silence, because I didn't have enough courage to say to you," I became like this because of you! "Idiot!" You take me to the seaside, I sit on your motorcycle and listen to the wind whizzing past my ears. My hand gently hugs your waist, and my face sticks to your back. It still smells like that. You gave me a bag of things in the surf, and then you said:
"Wei Hui, you are my favorite student. You are a woman as soft as water. Although you always pretend to be strong, I know your heart wants to be comforted. You are a kind girl. As soon as I saw you, I thought you looked familiar. So I trust you very much. Listen to me quietly: I don't belong in this town, and I shouldn't marry my present wife. I should go, but I have something for you to take care of for me, okay? " There is a confused emotion in your eyes, which I can't see through and I don't know what you are thinking at the moment.
"Why did you leave? Even if your wife has taken your daughter away, you and your daughter still have many wonderful memories in this town! You don't need to leave to vent your inner thoughts, do you? Is there really no person or thing worth remembering here? "
"I can't. I have to go to Canada. I miss my daughter very much. Can you help me? If not, forget it. I don't want to force you! "
"How could I not want to help you? Only what do you do to make sense? "
"Help or not, you will know the rest later?"
"Help, let me help you."
Moro, why do you want me to keep that thing for you? You gave us a reason to meet again. Why should I spend every day of the next year with great expectations? Your daughter is all you have? Does this mean that no woman can really walk into your heart? Can I wait forever?
Fate is so wonderful and profound.
You just disappeared from my life, without a trace, but let me watch it from morning till night, from night to night.
The day when the news of your death came, it was a year later when my birthday was approaching, and the sun was still shining. Your ex-wife called me from Canada and said that when you were crossing the street in Canada to buy chocolate for your daughter, your daughter kept clamoring for chocolate from her ex-wife, so you stepped up, but a fast jeep came to you and you were hit by a jeep before you could dodge. When I heard this, my brain suddenly collapsed, but your ex-wife said that you kept calling my name when you died and asked your ex-wife to show me that thing so that I wouldn't be sad. I didn't go home immediately after hanging up the phone, but walked along the direction of your home to the seaside, where we had too many memories. I just want to continue to love you very humble. Even if you don't love me at all, you won't give me a complete future. I can still love you silently and humbly, but why is fate so cruel that I don't even have the opportunity to love you?
In the dead of night, I slowly opened what you gave me, and I cried while watching it. It turns out that you and I have the same program, the honor roll, the music score you helped me change, our little band and your photos, some photos when I arranged a musical on the beach and a blue envelope. I was in tears. So you love me silently? I fell asleep in tears, but I still heard you say in your ear, "Wei Wei, you are a gentle woman." As soon as I saw you, I thought you looked familiar. ...
Mo Lu, Mo Lu, love hurts so much. Now that the plot is over, why do you leave me alone in the world? Since you say you love me too, do you take me as a substitute? You haven't answered too many questions!
Miss youth, miss youth.
Wrong, wrong.
When I am far away from love, I have forgotten my mind.
Sad, affectionate, charming
The world wants to forget you.
How is it possible to sway for a thousand years?
Remember your heart and face yesterday.
My heart burns with joy.
I only love you in this life.
Don't forget the implicit complaints.
Some people are meant to be, and you can't escape;
Some people are born with birthmarks that can never be forgotten;
Some people are humble in love;
Some people are always associated with youth.
It is wrong to read youth.
It is a fatal mistake for you and me to miss youth!
∑ Part Ⅱ Han Weiwei: You are the person I want to take care of most in my life.
Dear Wei Hui:
When you read this letter, it means that I finally got up the courage to confess to you!
I love you! But I want to invite you to listen to a love story first.
Ten years ago, a young couple came to this town with a three-month-old baby girl. They are so young and happy that their wives like the peace of this town. They have agreed to raise their children quietly here. Wife is so pure. Although she is the mother of a child, her face is still childish. They love each other very much. A wife always pays silently to her husband, without a superfluous word. Her love seems humble, but it is great. The days passed day by day, but just one year after I had a sexual dream on my pillow, my wife unfortunately fell into the sea and could no longer feel her husband's passionate love for her. Men are heartbroken and crying silently with their children in their arms.
Later, the child grew up gradually, and the man worried that the child lacked maternal love, so he asked someone to introduce him to another woman, who looked dignified and beautiful and loved the child in various ways. They are married, but how can a marriage without love be happy? A man still thinks of his dead wife every day before he meets another girl. That girl is as kind and gentle as his wife. He saw the shadow of his wife in this girl. He once vowed to take care of the girl who looks like her all her life, but what can he do? The girl is a little younger than him, and he can't give her happiness. He can do too little, so when the girl took her own music to participate in the competition, he let the girl participate without thinking, and the musical she rehearsed with later was also a hard-won opportunity for men. However, after five or six years, the woman really couldn't stand it and filed for divorce. The man always asked his daughter to be happy, and finally compromised and agreed that the woman would take her to Canada. Because he wants to stay and take care of the girl. But after his daughter left, he couldn't bear to miss her and decided to let her wait for him.
Wei Wei, you know now! How much I love you and want to care about you!
Do you want me to take care of you?
Moru
Miss youth, miss youth.
Wrong, wrong.
When I am far away from love, I have forgotten my mind.
Sad, affectionate, charming
The world wants to forget you.
How is it possible to sway for a thousand years?
Remember your heart and face yesterday.
My heart burns with joy.
I only love you in this life.
Don't forget the implicit complaints.
Some people are meant to be, and you can't escape;
Some people are born with birthmarks that can never be forgotten;
Some people are humble in love;
Some people are always associated with youth.
It is wrong to read youth.
It is a fatal mistake for you and me to miss youth!
The sun still shines on the town, but the mood at that time has long been disrupted by time and fate!
Who will tidy up my mind?
How long do I have to wait to welcome you back?
Mo Lu,
I can't treat all this as an understatement!
I think I will use my life to thank you for your best care for me!
This is the final answer to the story!