Article | Melodious
Yi Nengjing bought 900 items online on Double Eleven, and her husband Qin Hao said: I will never let you worry about money in this life. Behind Yi Nengjing's willful behavior is a good husband. What is enviable is not only her husband's tolerance and care, but also the stable and happy marriage between the two.
Marriage is the harbor of love between two people. However, once a marriage is derailed, it will not just be as simple as the breakup of two people.
The famous British novelist, playwright, and essayist Somerset Maugham, in his novel "The Veil", tells people a story of a cheated marriage and the human nature behind the marriage.
Maugham is recognized as one of the most popular and popular British writers in the world in the 20th century, and is known as "the best storyteller". His novels are witty and humorous, and often contain pity and sympathy for human nature hidden in the sarcasm.
It is said that Maugham liked to listen to stories. Once when he traveled to Italy, the landlord's daughter told him a story based on a poem in Dante's "Divine Comedy."
Maugham adapted this story. He replaced the protagonist with an Englishman and the castle full of poisonous gas with a small southern town in China where cholera was rampant. Therefore, the novel "The Veil" was created, a story about the heroine's betrayal and self-redemption in marriage.
The heroine Katie of "The Veil" is a rich lady living in Vanity Fair. She has a beautiful appearance, but an empty spirit. She yearns for beautiful love, but only looks at the vanity exterior. She is helplessly trapped in her mother's In the arranged marriage plan, she was ridiculed and condemned for becoming a "leftover girl".
Unwilling to endure her mother's ridicule and outsiders' criticism, Katie agreed to the marriage proposal of a dull bacteriologist. Katie and bacteriologist Walter are not the same kind of people. They are in two different spiritual worlds.
The marriage relationship between Katie and Walter is only very rigid. They do not integrate with each other, and they stick to their own habits in life and emotions. Soon, Katie cheated on Walter's official friend, the vain and unrestrained assistant chief secretary Tang Sheng.
After Walter learned that Katie had cheated on her, he took extreme revenge. Katie's love fantasy was shattered by Tang Sheng's ugly soul, and she started her own redemption with a cold heart.
01
If you cannot escape the trap of your original family, your life is destined to go further and further
Katie’s unfortunate marriage seems to be an unintentional choice, but it is actually inevitable happened. The influence of her original family on her and her failure to transcend her original family doomed her view of marriage to deviate.
Katie's mother, Mrs. Justin, is a mean-spirited woman who is extremely dominating, ambitious but stingy.
When she met Justin, she married him because her father, a lawyer, predicted that he would have a bright future. However, his career hesitated after marriage and was despised by Mrs. Justin. Mrs. Justin is like a manipulator behind the scenes, struggling to control her husband's future and the fate of the family.
The dilemma her husband brought to her did not dampen her performance in the social arena at all. She pinned her hopes on her two daughters. She wants to rely on her daughters to find a happy husband and eliminate all the bad luck in her life.
She is ambitious and wants to find her daughter not a good husband, but an outstanding husband. In her eyes, her daughter's happiness is not as good as a decent reputation.
In psychology, there are over-functioning people and under-functioning people in family relationship patterns. At home, Mrs. Justine exists as a "hyperfunctioner" who exerts strong control over the lives of others. The husband and daughter exist as "deficient persons."
It has become a habit for "underfunctioners" to rely on "overfunctioners". Before Katie realizes herself, she cannot transcend her family of origin and can only submit to her mother's arrangements.
Katie did not have the ability to make the right choice, and actually married a man she did not love just because of "I love you". She just wanted to escape her mother's ridicule and other people's comments. What's even more tragic is that her life has deviated from the direction.
In order to avenge his wife's infidelity, the silent Walter began a crazy revenge. Katie was abandoned by the hypocritical Tang Sheng, and she had to follow Walter to Meitan Mansion, a small town in southern China where cholera was rampant.
There, Katie was surrounded by fear, and death appeared like a ghost at any time. Walter's heartbroken companionship brought Katie to the edge of collapse.
She knew that Walter looked down on her. She complained: "It's unfair for you to do this to me. It's unfair for you to blame me because I'm stupid, frivolous and vain. This is how I was brought up, and so are all the girls around me. ·······”
Katie plays the role of a dysfunctional person in the family. The choice of fate and marriage is not within her ability, and she will only passively accept what fate arranges for her. Everything, this is also the root cause of Katie's unhappy marriage.
Only by jumping out of the trap of your original family and understanding what you want can you not be manipulated by others and listen to others' arrangements. Only by learning to discern what you really want can you find a happy life.
If Katie had an independent and perfect personality, she would not easily marry Walter, whom she does not love, nor would she easily fall in love with the frivolous and hypocritical Tang Sheng.
02
In marriage, loving and being loved should be two-way
In order to marry Katie, Walter said with a clumsy mouth: " I love you more than anything." "I know you are stupid, frivolous, and empty-minded, but I love you. I know your intentions, your ideals, your power, and your vulgarity, but I know you. You are a second-rate thing, but I love you." From the beginning, Walter used humble love to set himself an unequal role in the marriage.
Katie is just incomprehensibly tolerant of Walter. She felt that Walter was not attractive at all, and he was not her type at all. Not tall, not strong at all, small and skinny. Katie is naturally lively and talks non-stop all day long, laughing whenever she wants. Walter is dull, silent, and never responds to Katie's gossip. She felt like he was a dull gourd, and sometimes she really wanted to go up and shake his head.
Walter likes to read books, but the books he reads are boring to Katie. The two of them are tied to each other in different circles in the name of husband and wife.
Walter’s humble love received no response from Katie. After Walter found out about Katie's affair with Tang Sheng, his heart collapsed. His humble love was insulted, so he decided to take revenge. Take Katie to Meitan Mansion where cholera is rampant. After that, he remained calm towards Katie, but Katie felt that his love had died.
While living in the epidemic area, Katie saw a completely different world and got to know Walter again. The abbot and nuns spoke highly of Walter's bravery and seriousness in his work. She began to truly see Walter as a person worthy of love, and also began to examine the emptiness and loneliness in her heart.
The love between them is not equal. When Walter loved her at first, what he got was contempt from her. Even so, he still loved her without any complaints and as always. Until her sentence completely broke the heart that loved her, and she regretted that she could no longer restore Walter's original heart. In Walter's heart, his love for Katie is like a broken mirror that can never be restored to its original state. The love that was wishful thinking at the beginning is now "overwhelmed".
The best form of love is when you face life together, you see him in your eyes, and he sees you all. Only by learning to appreciate and love each other can your marriage be the happiest.
The marriage and love between Yang Jiang and Qian Zhongshu has made many people envious. They often praise each other and do not hesitate to say the most beautiful words of love to each other. Qian Zhongshu once summed up his love with Yang Jiang in one sentence: "A unique combination of three incompatible people: wife, lover, and friend."
Love in marriage should also be Two-way, equal, no one is dependent on anyone, they love each other and give to each other. Only this kind of love and marriage can be preserved for a long time.
03
Only by facing your heart can you find yourself
Walter unfortunately contracted cholera and died after learning that Katie was pregnant. In fact, it was his heart that could no longer The heart that can withstand any blow is completely in despair. With regret and reluctance, he said: "The dead dog is indeed dead" and passed away.
Katie knowingly made up a lie and told Walter that the child was theirs, which might save the fate of the two of them and even their marriage. But at this time, in this field of life and death, Katie had seen the powerlessness of life and the courage of living. She began to seek inner peace.
According to Freud's personality analysis theory, the human heart is divided into three parts: "id", "ego" and "superego". "I" is a kind of personality that exists when a person is born, with only the most instinctive needs. It follows the pleasure principle and strives to achieve the satisfaction of all desires, wishes and needs. In the past, when Katie cheated on Tang Sheng, she indulged her "self" and lost her "self".
In Kaitie, Meitan Province, we witnessed the tragic death of thousands of people. On the line between life and death, people’s lives were like dung. Some people are radiating brilliance, such as her husband Walter, such as the abbot and the nuns who stick to their beliefs and fearlessly sacrifice to save lives. At this time, Katie's "superego" awakened her self-ideal and conscience. She vaguely felt a mysterious power and struggled to find that power.
When the "id" and "superego" reach a state of balance, a new "self" is formed.
Katie returned to Hong Kong alone after her husband was buried. She felt an unprecedented freedom and a new yearning for the future.
However, the hypocritical Tang Sheng came to harass Katie again and captured Katie again. However, Katie felt deeply ashamed afterwards and could no longer tolerate indulging herself. Therefore, she decided to leave and return to her hometown.
My mother has passed away, and my father seems to have experienced unprecedented relief. Katie hopes she can give birth to a daughter, raise her alone and make her an independent girl who is not attached to any man. They will start a new life. At this time, Katie has transformed into a person who faces life independently. She has found her own role and the confidence to be a good mother and daughter.
In the novel "The Veil", we see the weakness of human nature and also discover the brilliance of human nature.
Under the veil of life, what is exposed is the ugliness of human nature, but in the end, it is the eternal brilliance of human nature that exudes the value of life.
To learn to love, you must first have the ability to love yourself, face your heart, and enrich yourself. Secondly, you must have the ability to love others, love for your family of origin, and responsibility and love for marriage.
Roland said: "Love is the flame of life. Without it, everything becomes dark night."
Only by learning to love and having love can you illuminate yourself, illuminate your life, and warm yourself. others.
Author introduction: Melodious, a mother who enriches her heart with reading and weaves her life with words. Read, write, love life.