Poetry in the newspaper

My dear, my love, my beautiful wife:

Marrying you ruined my life.

My dear, my love, my beautiful wife, my life has been ruined by your hands.

I saw your face when I was dreaming.

So I always wake up screaming.

Your face vaguely fell into the dream, so I woke up screaming.

Kind, intelligent, caring and hot;

This describes everything you are not.

Kindness, intelligence, affection and sexiness, but you don't take them.

I thought I wouldn't love anyone

-Until I met your brother.

I thought I only loved you all my life until I met your second cousin.

I want to feel your sweet hug;

But don't take the paper bag off your face.

I long for your gentle hug, but don't take off your mask.

My feelings for you are beyond words,

Except "go to hell"

My love for you is beyond words,

Except "step aside"!