This is also a disgusting thing.
There are some things that healthy people or patients will not think of, maybe they are not in conformity, maybe they are too subtle. After a serious illness, you will experience it; For me, the horror of fatigue and the comfort of rest are two good examples. I used to be very conceited and never knew the so-called fatigue.
There is a round chair in front of the desk. It is work to sit and concentrate on writing or reading. There is a cane chair next to it, which means chatting or reading newspapers at will; I don't think there is much difference between the two. I tend to be conceited. Now I know I'm wrong, so it makes no big difference, but because I'm not tired, I just don't work hard.
I have a relative's child who graduated from high school but had to be an apprentice in a sock factory. His mood is very unhappy, and his work is very heavy, and he has no rest almost all year round. He was so tall that he refused to be lazy and supported him for more than a year. One day, he suddenly sat down and said to his brother, "I have no strength at all."
Since then, he can't stand up, send him home, lie down, don't want to eat, don't want to move, don't want to talk. He invited doctors from Jesus Church to see him and said that they were all fine, but they were all tired. There is no cure. Naturally, this connection is accompanied by a quiet death. I once had this situation for two days, but for different reasons, he was very tired and I was sick.
I really don't have any desire. It seems that everything has nothing to do with me. All actions are troubled times. I didn't think of death, but I didn't feel alive either. This is the so-called "state of no desire" and the first step of death.
There are people who have loved me, so they secretly shed tears; However, I have become better. I want to drink some soup. I sometimes look around, such as walls and flies. Only then will I feel tired and need a rest.
It's a great pleasure for an elephant to lie with its heart stretched out, yawn loudly, put everyone in the right position, and then relax all the power points. I never liked it before. I don't think the strong or the blessed have enjoyed it.
I remember the year before last, I wrote an essay "Miscellaneous Talks after Illness" after my illness. There were five sections, and I invested in literature, but the last four sections could not be published, only the first section was printed. Although there is a word "one" in front of the article, it suddenly stops behind, and there is no "two" or "three". It's strange to think about it carefully, but it can't ask every reader, or even expect critics.
So someone based on this section, I came to the conclusion: "Lu Xun is in favor of getting sick." This kind of disaster may be avoided for the time being, but I might as well declare here first: "My words are over."
Four or five nights after my connecting flight, I woke up and called Guangping.
"Give me some water to drink. Then turn on the light and show it to me. "
"Why? ..... "Her voice was a little flustered, and she probably thought I was saying something stupid.
"Because I want to live. You got it? This is also life. I want to see it. "
"Oh ..." She came up, gave me a few mouthfuls of tea, lingered for a while, and then lay down gently without turning on the light.
I know she doesn't understand me.
The light of the street lamp came in through the window, and the room was faintly lit. I saw at a glance that the familiar wall, the ridge at the end of the wall, the familiar pile of books, the unfinished photo albums, the ongoing night outside, the infinite distance and countless people are all related to me. I exist, I live, I want to live, I begin to feel more practical, I have the desire to act-but soon I fell asleep again.
The next morning, when I was watching in the sun, sure enough, the familiar walls, the familiar piles of books … these, which I often watch at ordinary times, are actually a kind of rest. But we have always looked down on these things. Even if it is a part of life, it is after drinking tea and scratching, or it is nothing at all. We pay attention to the special essence, not in the branches and leaves.
People who preach to celebrities generally exaggerate their characteristics, such as how Li Bai wrote poems and played tricks, how Napoleon fought and didn't sleep, but they won't say how they didn't play tricks and how they wanted to sleep. In fact, you can't live without playing tricks or sleeping. People can sometimes cheat and stay up, just because sometimes they don't cheat and stay up.
However, people think that these ordinary things are the dregs of life and don't look at them.
So the people or things you see are just like the blind touching the elephant's feet, that is, they think the elephant looks like a pillar. The ancients in China often wanted everything, that is, to make "Wuji Baifeng Pills" for women, and to put the whole chicken in the pills even with hair and blood. The method is ridiculous, but the idea is good.
People who cut off branches and leaves decide not to get flowers and fruits.
In order not to turn on the light for me, I was very dissatisfied with Guangping and attacked everyone; When I can walk around, I go through the publications she has read. Sure enough, during my illness, there were many publications full of essence. Although some things are beauty tips, the glow of ancient trees or the secret of nuns, there is always a little passionate article on the first side.
There is a "central theme" in the composition: even Sai Jinhua, who slept with German commander Vadexi for a period of time in the Boxer era, has long been named the queen of protecting the country for nine days.
What is particularly shocking is that the Spring and Autumn Annals, which are used to tell the Qing court's Shen Bao with relish, are also quite different from time to time. One day, in the "Didi" at the end of the roll, when people eat watermelon, they should also think of the fragmentation of our land, just like this watermelon.
Naturally, this is unpatriotic and has always been beyond reproach. But if I think so and eat watermelon at the same time, I'm afraid I can't swallow it. Even if I swallow it hard, I can't digest it, and it will bang in my stomach for a long time.
This is not necessarily because I have a nervous breakdown after my illness. I think, if compared with watermelon, I talked about national humiliation handouts, but immediately I happily ate this watermelon and became a flesh-and-blood nutritionist. I am afraid this person is a little numb. No matter what lecture notes are given to him, it is useless.
I have never been a volunteer, so I'm not sure. But I ask myself: if a soldier eats watermelon, is it a ceremony to think while eating it? I think: not necessarily. He probably only felt thirsty and wanted to eat, which was delicious, but he didn't think of other good reasons.
I feel refreshed after eating watermelon. Fighting is different from when my throat is dry and my tongue is open. Therefore, eating watermelon is indeed related to resisting the enemy, but it has nothing to do with the strategy formulated by Shanghai. So I ate and drank sadly all day, and before long, my appetite dropped, and there were no enemies to fight.
However, people often like to say some strange things, and even a watermelon is unwilling to advocate ordinary eating methods. In fact, the daily life of soldiers is not all touching, but it is related to the touching part. This is a real soldier. (This article is included in Luan Jieting's Prose Collection. )
Extended data:
In the 14th year of the Republic of China (1925), the "women's normal university agitation" was further upgraded. Lu Xun was dismissed by Zhang, the chief education officer, for supporting the just struggle of progressive students. In the same year, Lu Xun reported Zhang to the research institute.
In the 15th year of the Republic of China (1926), in March, the "March 18th Massacre" occurred. In April, Lu Xun wrote "Death" and "Remembering the King", criticizing Duan government for killing students. He was chased to take refuge in Yamamoto Hospital. I have been writing during my refuge. In August, "Wandering" was published, and he went to Xiamen University as a professor of Chinese Department. 65438+resigned in February. ?
In the Republic of China 16 (1927), 1 June, he went to teach at Sun Yat-sen University. In March, I met with Chen Yannian, secretary of Guangdong and Guangxi District Committee. On April 1 day, he gave a speech "Literature in the Revolutionary Era" at Huangpu Military Academy. 12 in April, there was a "412 counter-revolutionary coup". On the 29th, he resigned angrily to save the progressive students. In August, published "Wei and Jin demeanor and articles and the relationship between medicine and wine."
In September, he wrote to Tai Jingnong, refused to be a candidate for Nobel Prize in Literature, left Guangzhou for Shanghai, and began to live with Xu Guangping in Shanghai. In 65438+February, there was an argument with Liang Shiqiu and others about "the third person" and "the free person", which lasted for a long time and had great influence.
In the 17th year of the Republic of China (1928), he joined the China Revolutionary Freemasonry in the spring. This year, we had a debate with most members of the Creation Society and Sun Society on the issue of "revolutionary literature". It was in 1998 that a large number of Marxist works were collected and translated. At the same time, he began to advocate revolutionary art and modern woodcut movement. ?
In the 18th year of the Republic of China (1929), Xu Guangping gave birth on September 27th, and Lu Xun named him "Zhou Haiying". At the end of the year, he negotiated with Feng Xuefeng many times to form the "China Left-wing Writers Union".