As the saying goes: "Unsatisfactory things often happen, but you can tell people the same thing."
In fact, when things go wrong, it is a long vacation given by fate. When one day the vacation ends, Life has truly begun.
We must learn three things to "please ourselves" when things are not going our way, so that our future life will become as we want.
01
Read yourself: Look at yourself and know the direction.
Life is like a long march of thousands of miles. Low points and confusion are inevitable. Those who complain will be trapped in place, but those who look at themselves will be reborn.
Zeng Guofan, a famous official in the late Qing Dynasty, made full reflection and found the direction of his career during the low period of his career. He finally "saved the Qing Dynasty from collapse" and achieved immortal merit.
At first, Zeng Guofan believed in the Confucian thought of "Heaven moves vigorously, and a gentleman strives to constantly strive for self-improvement." Therefore, he was straightforward, did not show face to others, and even dared to threaten Emperor Xianfeng.
In 1857, the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom was at its peak. Only the Hunan army trained by Zeng Guofan in the Qing Dynasty could resist it.
Zeng Guofan's father passed away. According to regulations, Zeng Guofan had to stay in Dingyou for three years. However, the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom's offensive was fierce, so Emperor Xianfeng persuaded him to stay.
Zeng Guofan didn't know what was wrong and took the opportunity to blackmail the emperor into giving him the power of governor.
So, the emperor waved his hand: "Then you go home to Dingyou."
Zeng Guofan was stunned. He thought that the emperor would compromise when employing people, but who knew that his wishful thinking would come true? Wrong.
Zeng Guofan's career reached a low point.
After returning home, Zeng Guofan kept thinking: "The emperor did not trust me and my colleagues did not go with me. What did I do wrong?"
When he was depressed, Zeng Guofan read the Confucianism he had read. I read the classics again, but still couldn't find the answer.
Finally, he set his sights on the thin booklet "Tao Te Ching".
With his life experience, he discovered that the so-called "weakness overcomes the strong" in the Tao Te Ching is the truth that should be upheld in the world.
What seems to be a passive rebirth, is actually a positive entry into the world, because the purpose can be better achieved through a roundabout way.
Thinking of this, Zeng Guofan had a profound enlightenment and excitedly wrote eight characters on the title page of the book: "Great softness is not soft, and extreme hardness has no hardness."
This ideological point Changes made Zeng Guofan more and more stable in his later period.
Many times, troughs are gifts from fate, which allow you time to reflect on yourself and then start over with a new attitude.
02
Go beyond yourself: surpass yourself, break first and then build.
Some people say: "Those who dare to struggle will find their way on earth, and those who dare to break will find their way everywhere."
The great Confucian Wang Yangming of the Ming Dynasty spent his life constantly making breakthroughs. Continuously building up, finally found the direction and established the Xinxue.
If people want to surpass themselves, they can only achieve self-transcendence by getting involved, breaking old rules and establishing new ones.
When Wang Yangming was very young, he told his teacher: "The first thing in life is to study and become a sage."
This sentence laid the path for his life development.
In order to find the way of sages, Wang Yangming went through a period of "five drownings", that is, he lost his way in five things.
They are knights, cavalry and archers, Ci Zhang, gods and Buddhas.
These five aspects were of great help to Wang Yangming’s career development, but they are not the way of a sage.
During this period, Wang Yangming also staged a play "Shou Ren's Study of Bamboo" based on Zhu Xi's theory of studying things to achieve knowledge. He stared at the bamboo for seven days, but not only did he not see any reason, he fell ill.
This made Wang Yangming doubt Zhu Xi's Neo-Confucianism.
Until the age of thirty-five, he offended Liu Jin because of his righteous speech, and was sent to Longchang, Guizhou.
When he was in such a situation, he began to reflect: "I spoke out for justice but was sent to Longchang. The way of sage has never found its direction. Now my life is in danger. Is it wrong to pursue the way of sage?"
< p>The fierce conflict in his heart finally turned into truth one night and appeared in Wang Yangming's heart.A burst of laughter pierced the night sky, yes, he had enlightened.
He said: "It is a big mistake to seek truth from external things. The way of a saint lies in everyone's heart."
As the saying goes: "Only when external things are broken can the vacuum be seen.
”
Looking at the process of Wang Yangming’s enlightenment, it is a process of getting rid of external objects and seeking the true heart.
First break and then build, transcend yourself. Break old habits and create new trends.< /p>
03
Please yourself: Pleasure yourself, feel at ease physically and mentally
Some people say: "People work hard in society, and in order to keep themselves free of stains, they will inevitably sacrifice for favors and fame. Tired, but people who understand life will put physical and mental freedom and pleasure first. "
Mr. Ji Xianlin once said: "There is no 100% life, only imperfection is life."
Since life is not perfect, just live the rest of your life freely.
At Peking University, Mr. Ji is a famous professor, but in life he is like a free and humorous neighbor.
The publication of "Tsinghua Garden Diary" is the best proof, which is recorded in the diary. Some of Mr. Ji's thoughts and emotions when he was in college, including some extreme words
When publishing, the publisher took into account Mr. Ji's image and suggested that it should be appropriately deleted.
Mr. Ji said: "I will not change a word or delete a word. I am not a saint. I exposed myself to the broad daylight." "
This straightforward move won unanimous praise.
Mr. Ji often eats as he pleases. He said: "To hell with calories and vitamins, I think I will eat if it tastes good. I have no burden on my heart and my appetite will naturally be good. "
One year during the Mid-Autumn Festival, Ji Lao made a special trip to Beijing Moscow Restaurant and tasted their most famous beer and ice cream.
My friend quickly told me: "You are not in good health. Well, no ice cream or anything like that. ”
Mr. Ji replied humorously: “I am a pig, so I can eat anything.” ”
In academia, Mr. Ji is recognized as an academic master. In order to break free from the shackles of fame and fortune, he resolutely does not want any title.
In 2007, Mr. Ji gave up three titles in one fell swoop ——Master of Chinese Studies, academic leader, and national treasure.
He said humorously: “Winning three laurels gives me freedom. ”
The greatest willfulness in life is to do what you like regardless of everything. Only in this way can you say that this life is worthwhile.
Only when the body and mind are at ease can you see your true colors. Everyone is very happy.